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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to start maternity leave as soon as I can just because I hate my job?

29 replies

LetMeAtTheWine · 26/03/2013 22:05

I only have 5 more weeks then due to start mat leave however, I really, really dislike my job and am desperate to finish sooner.
Financially it makes sense to stay longer (and my OH wants me to maximise earnings before leaving) but it is unlikely I will have a job to go back to, due to the current position of the company, so not sure it will impact on time spent at home with baby LetMe after the birth (which was another of OH's concerns).
Would it be unreasonable to finish sooner despite feeling well and being physically capable of working?

OP posts:
mamababa · 26/03/2013 22:08

Yabu. It's 5 weeks. Surely if you are well the money is useful.

LindyHemming · 26/03/2013 22:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

peppabacon · 26/03/2013 22:09

YABU, you get terribly bored waiting in the house for a baby.

Original poster
LetMeAtTheWine · 26/03/2013 22:10

The money is useful but am feeling desperate! Kind of expect to be told I am BU but trying to convince myself otherwise...Sad

OP posts:
willyoulistentome · 26/03/2013 22:11

Stick it out.

Footface · 26/03/2013 22:12

Do you have any holiday you can use

Blessyou · 26/03/2013 22:12

Can you use holiday to take a couple of days off per week til finishing?

LindyHemming · 26/03/2013 22:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

queenofthepirates · 26/03/2013 22:14

Nah... run like the wind

ceeveebee · 26/03/2013 22:14

I was about to suggest the same as footface - I took 6 weeks annual leave before my due date as I had just had enough and needed to get in a relaxed frame of mind and basically just doss around before the shock of motherhood!

Original poster
LetMeAtTheWine · 26/03/2013 22:14

I see a theme occurring Smile

Nope, unfortunately no holiday to be taken - have had to use it up already.

OP posts:
ceeveebee · 26/03/2013 22:16

When does your holiday year start? I used my holidays in advance for the year I was off ie if your year starts on 1 April won't you get a full 5-6 weeks to use (which normally you tag on the end?)

AuntieStella · 26/03/2013 22:17

Sorry, but another one who thinks stick it out.

Especially if you think you won't have a job to go to - a redundancy payment would come in handy and perhaps buy you a bit more time at home when your baby is actually here.

AuntieStella · 26/03/2013 22:19

BTW, which week is your ML due to start? If later than 29, could you negotiate to bring it forward?

lastnightidreamt · 26/03/2013 22:19

I was the same as you, and left as soon as I could because I knew I wouldn't go back.

However, when it came to it, I could have stayed on for a few more weeks - the pressure was off, I just did the bare minimum (I know that sounds awful), and just knowing I only had a few more weeks to go made it bearable.

LilyAmaryllis · 26/03/2013 22:19

Are there any nasty clauses about coming back after your maternity leave otherwise you have to give your extra maternity pay back?

If not, then yes, I'd leave early. You only live once! Also, you only have maternity leave as a relaxing experience, once. If you have a second child, you will also have first child to continue to look after during your "maternity leave".

If you do have to go back to justify your maternity pay, then of course the earlier you go, the earlier you'll have to return (and the younger your child will be). (What happens if you have to return, but the company has folded??! But I guess you don't KNOW that's going to happen.)

Original poster
LetMeAtTheWine · 26/03/2013 22:19

Aah, cross posts and a few telling me what I want to hear!

I hate it because I am totally unsupported by management and have a difficult time get agreement on decisions I don't have the authority to make myself. This means that I don't really achieve much day to day as I am always just chasing people up and waiting for others. Soul destroying. Have tried to speak to them about it but they never follow up on anything, despite saying it will be sorted. Other minor issues as well but I guess everyone has to put up with those.

OP posts:
DaisyBug · 26/03/2013 22:22

I'd get out if I were you. There's all sorts of research out now about how your stress levels, mood and even general happiness can impact on your unborn baby. It may be 'only' 5 weeks to you as a working adult, but 5 weeks is a long time in fetal development and could be very significant. You'd be much better off using the time to put your feet up at home, relax, meditate, think positive thoughts, etc. You're also more likely to have a better labour if you don't begin it exhausted. There is far, far more to life - and certainly to creating new life - than money.

Good luck!

Viviennemary · 26/03/2013 22:22

Of course YANBU to want to leave a job you hate as soon as possible. However, if money is a big issue then try and endure the five weeks. If not leave.

Original poster
LetMeAtTheWine · 26/03/2013 22:24

It's due to start at 36 weeks so will have a decent amount of time off already. If I do go back I would need to do 3 months return of service as a result of receiving enhanced mat pay.
They aren't keen on giving me holiday that hasn't already been accrued - have already tried that one!

OP posts:
DarcyRhone · 26/03/2013 22:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

daisydalrymple · 26/03/2013 22:26

Finish early!!! - I loved my time at home when I started ML at 35 wks. - and DS was 11 days late too. Yes, the time the other side might be useful, but you will never again have the time to sit on sofa, read books, watch box sets etc. without somebody needing something Smile. If you want to do it, then do it. Not everybody does - a lot of women prefer to work up until 38/39 wks and maximise time the other side - I totally respect that. BUT, I never wanted to do it Grin and if you really want to finish early, then go for it.

FishfingersAreOK · 26/03/2013 22:27

If you are not sure your job will be there when you get back make sure you get agreed before you start ML then take the chance now to make sure you have an up to date job description/grading agreed. If role is made redundant it is v useful to be able to demonstrate your old role rather than them trying to pretend a much junior role is "equal". This happened to me. They tried to say a more junior role was the same. It was to what i had been recruited to 5 year previously but I had doubled responsibilities and salary....because I spent the time getting my job desc updated I could prove it. I got redundancy payment.

BonaDrag · 26/03/2013 22:28

Take it. Stay home, watch Jezza Kyle and eat pastries.

My four weeks of leave before I have birth were great. I stayed in bed and watched Homeland.

BonaDrag · 26/03/2013 22:29

Gave!

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