To think that its a bit rude to change the place cards at a reception?

[CrysPally]

Sorry it this is retreading old ground, but this was brought up in the thread about separating couples at a wedding dinner, and I was surprised at the casualness with which some people suggested just swapping the place cards around. Surely there's far more to this then a guest could ever know about? The places might have been carefully chosen so that a shy/awkward person isn't on their tod, or that that Uncle Wandering Hands is kept safe, or any number of other things.

Leaving aside the couples together / apart etiquette, isn't it a bit rude to assume that you know better than the B&G?

I don't think it's that.

I'd rather sit with my friends at a wedding, but I still think it's inconsiderate to move name places.

You are messing with a plan that had a lot of thought go into it - and the risk of people getting the wrong food has become very real for me and not a minor incidental.

It wouldn't have bothered me.

Unless you had specific dietary requirements at our wedding you got what you were given food wise- do weddings really have hundreds of food choices so that moving one place up would make a difference? If so, maybe you should have a rethink. It really shouldn't be so complicated, and you really shouldn't be putting your guests to a lot of trouble. When organising the wedding, the first thought should be for your guests. Some people have made a lot of effort, spent a lot of money, travelled a long way, given up their time to get there.

I agree swapping between tables for the meal is rude as someone else may be put out. But swapping the cards on the table itself should be a fairly minor thing. If guests are swapping cards about a lot though, whoever did the table plan has failed. No-one swapped at our wedding, there was no need as everyone was sitting near people they knew and felt comfortable with. The attitude of "'I've paid for a new hat so I'll bloody well sit where I like'" is rude, but so is also "I am the Bridezilla, all bow down to ME, you will sit where I put you".