to think that DDs school is obsessed with attendance levels and feel offended?

[msjones80]

DD is in reception and she has been ill several times in the last term. Even though all absences were justified, I recently got a call from the school and the advisor from the council to discuss her absences. They suggested I was maybe being "too soft" and that children her age like to "exaggerate" to stay home and watch telly. I told them I only kept her home when she was clearly unwell (fever, diarrea, vomiting...) or there was a risk for the other children. I also let them know that each day I kept her home was a day lost at work. Still, they said that children sometimes could go to school with a little paracetamol, that that's how they build their immune system, and requested that I keep providing them with evidence whenever she's sick.

Now she's ill once more. She has had high fever (37-39C) since last Wednesay. I took her to the GP but she said they don't do letters, only appointment slips, and that my word should be enough and the school had no legal right to ask for evidence.

AIBU? Isn't is outrageous that the school cares more about attendance levels that the wellbeing of children? Do I have to give them proof everytime she's ill? Has anyone experienced the same?

Have never heard of a child going to the toilet just to blow their nose...ridiculous. Germs happen regardless of your child going to the loo, and dignity? We all blow our noses! That's just encouraging weird OCD habits!

I really wouldn't worry. I have had these for the last two years and the attendance officer now feels like a friend.

It's the rules. Your dd is 5 and we are practically the only country in the world who sends our kids to school this early.

I work in a reception class and hate to see poorly children dumped at school to spend the day lying in the book corner and crying as the calpol wears off.

If she's sick she's sick. You don't have to justify yourself.

My school, in theory, asks for medical evidence every time they are off. But she has rarely needed a gp, it's been d and v, fever with sore throat etc. They haven't insisted, and I wouldn't be arsed if they asked me. They have to. Generally they know the difference between reasonable genuine illness compared to can't be bothered to bring the children to school/a week off sick with a broken flask.

Sending my child to school with fever no way! I think fever is there for a reason/cause and, regardless of Calpol, she would still feel pretty miserable and might get worse. To me, that is giving more importance to what the school to what the school will say or to your need to carry on rather than to the child's wellbeing.

DD's absence last term was slightly above 15% - she wasnt sick every week, but some kids get sick more often than others. I would say she'd be unwell every 2-3 weeks for a few days.

Does anyone know if I have to present them with proof of having gone to the doctor?

Our practice only gives same-day appointments if it's an emergency, so I feel bad firstly for taking my child out of bed when I know what they will say (keep her home, give her ibuprofen/paracetamol if fever gets too hight etc) and secondly for using an emergency appointment that someone else might need more.

Is she your pfb op. That attendance is pretty poor. Don't you worry that her social life/ friendship groups will suffer.

Mine have to evidence at least broken limbs to get time off school.

sorry didn't make that clear - her absences were over 15%, her attendance was around 80-85%.

I think 85% is quite low so I'm not surprised school is concerned tbh. Our school sends out letters when it hits 90%

DD2 had glandular fever at the end of the summer holidays a couple of years ago and ended up with the first 2 weeks off school. We had doctors letters and everything but the school still got involved.

The unfortunate thing was that it happened right at the beginning of the school year, so for the first term her attendance was awful, but as the year went on, she wasn't off sick again and the % righted itself

Far too often children are kept from school for nothing less than a runny nose and as schools are judged on their attendance then is it no wonder they are concerned with low levels of a child who does not have underling medical issues

This ^^

And I personally would pay more attention to how your child actually feels, than to numbers on a thermometer.

Wow, 80-85% attendance is very poor. I'm not surprised they are concerned either given those figures.

Most children with a mild temperature are actually fine to go in with a dose of calpol. A few days off every 2 or 3 weeks without an underlying medical condition is ridiculous frankly.

YANBU

When DD1 was in reception/y1 she had recurrent tonsillitis. Her attendance was 70%. She was antibiotics for at least two weeks of every month for over 2 years. Part of the problem was that the school would "forget" to give her her doses whilst she was there. This meant the only way for her to recover was to be off.

The doctors would not consider a tonsillectomy. I begged the school to write to the doctor about the level of absence but they said it was normal for a child of her age. As did the doctor.

Fast forward to end of Y1 and I get a call as you did! The doctors refused to write a letter as they said everything was normal. I would have thought the fact my DD was constantly on antibiotics would have been proof enough that she was ill.

If you have maintained contact with the school at all points I would carry on as you are. What do the doctors say about it all? I would pass on their view that the school has no right to intervene. Is your child keeping up with the work?

Ignore all the stupid "pfb" comments. Ridiculous.

But she should go into school if has a slight temperature and no other signs.

was so busy writing my rant things moved on several pages!

85% attendance means your child misses the equivalent of one and a half days every two weeks.

80% attendance means your child misses the equivalent of one day every week.

That's an awful lot to miss.

Sending my child to school with fever no way! I think fever is there for a reason/cause and, regardless of Calpol, she would still feel pretty miserable and might get worse

Yes but there's a huge difference between a child who has a temperature high enough to make them clearly unwell and just a slightly raised temperature which, on its own, it not necessarily a forerunner of anything.

Quite honestly I think far too much attention is paid to numbers on a thermometer, not least because individual temperature can vary anyway. But if all your dd has is a temperature of 37 you give her a spoonfull of Calpol and send her in. She might get worse but equally, she may well be fine and if a temperature reading of 37 is the only symptom then you should send her in. Save absences for when the illness is worthy of them.

^ exactly Worra that's why I kept asking for a tonsillectomy! The doctor felt that was perfectly acceptable!

wiley your specific and personal experience does not mean the OP isn't being unreasonable. You knew there was an underlying/recurring condition. The OP hasn't mentioned antibiotics or recurring conditions, just very slight temperatures and calpol.

No one has said she shouldn't keep her child off for the d&v.

oops just seen your follow up post too!

However in the OPs case if she has constant D&V could this be something that the doctor should be looking in to?

OP what is your daughter doing at home on all these absence days?

The problem is though that if you keep your Dd off school every single time she has a higher than normal temp at this age she may never go in! My SIL has a very similar attitude and keeps my nephew off school when he has a cold. She took him out of his previous school as she felt 'bullied' by the teachers regarding his attendance.
He's 15 now and all he's learnt is that if he fancies a day off he just has to look at his mum with big eyes and tell her he feels poorly. Fortunately he's incredibly intelligent and can keep up with the work but at your Dd's age she does need to be in unless she is clearly unwell otherwise she will lose so much time at such an important age. A slightly raised temp can be dealt with and a word to the teacher at drop off if she has had a dose of Calpol should be enough. If you show thT you are willing to work witht the school they will probably back off.

Sorry folk and worra I keep x posting and getting mixed up.

Am going to hush now .... But folk you are right.

80% attendance is the equivalent of an entire year at Junior school missed.

Wiley

Actually thinking back to the OP saying "her attendance was around 80-85%".

Well what exactly was it? They must have been specific when they rang?