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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that TESCO should be held accountable for selling something like this?

112 replies

ChipTheFish · 16/03/2013 21:43

I was shopping in Tesco tonight for a Birthday card for my brother. My DP was looking through the humour section and drew my attention to a disgusting card that was on display in the front row of the section. It read:

BEWARE

INSIDE IS A

FILTHY

LITTLE BITCH JUST

FOR YOU TO LOOK AT.

Inside is a picture of a dog. I assume that is meant to be the 'humorous' aspect of it.

Have I had a sense of humour failure? I don't find this at all funny. It gives the the creeps. That kind of language - ''filthy little bitch,'' is what I think most people would associate with hardcore pornography. The 'little,' to me, implies young, which just makes it even worse.

Who would give this as a Birthday card? And why do Tesco think this kind of thing is acceptable for a place where families shop?

Please tell me I'm not being unreasonable!

OP posts:
BoffinMum · 17/03/2013 10:56

Yes, that's a bit crap of Tesco tbh.

bangwhizz · 17/03/2013 10:58

The fun police are out early today

It is a joke! maybe not all that funny, maybe very predictable but it is still a joke.
Really some of you are heading for an early grave to get so worked up about such trivialities! Pick your battles!!

PassTheTwiglets · 17/03/2013 11:01

bangwhizz, what if the joke was racist or homophobic? Should we let that go too?

MyDarlingClementine · 17/03/2013 11:13

I dont like Rappers refering to women in derogatory ways no.

It is possible to not like or like or like and not like quite a few things at once in the brain?

AmandaPayneNeedsaHoliday · 17/03/2013 11:16

I do pick my battles. Reducing sexist misogynist shit is important to me, so it's one of my battles.

I absolutely cannot stand this 'it's just a joke' thing.

It's just a joke is the standard societal excuse for continuing to behave in appalling ways. So not only do the perpetrators get to continue doing it, they get to take the moral high ground that those affected 'can't take a joke'.

It is up there with the "I've seen your boobs" Oscar sketch

Nanny0gg · 17/03/2013 11:28

What AmandaPayneNeedsaHoliday said.

Why do people need to be told which 'battles' are important? Surely it's an individual's choice?

MyDarlingClementine · 17/03/2013 11:44

Yes agree with Amanda.

ReluctantBeing · 17/03/2013 11:55

It doesn't bother me. If anything, it forces someone to think about the real meaning of the words.

AlistairSim · 17/03/2013 11:58

Ditto what Amanda and NannyOgg said.

DianaTrent · 17/03/2013 12:07

My little sister tells me stories from her high school (catholic) where young boys have used language like this in texts and facebook messages to girls she knows. It's becoming too common to hear women and girls spoken about in a derogatory and sexualised way.

^ This.

What bothers me is that in a year or two DD will be shopping for cards, reading these things for herself, and encountering these messages in all kinds of places. On it's own, this card means very little, but combined with all the other references to women as disposable sexual objects she will encounter in music, advertising, television etc. I do worry what this all does as a girl develops her ideas of what female sexuality is and what she may begin to feel that it should be. I am sure there are many who can read this as a joke and feel nothing derogatory towards women by doing so, but even if you find it amusing and want to argue that there is a place for this kind of thing, the front shelf of a supermarket really isn't it.

soverylucky · 17/03/2013 12:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FutTheShuckUp · 17/03/2013 12:43

Absoltutely spot on soverylucky.
Those insisting its harmless and just a bit of fun im pressuming you will be happy for your dd's to be refered to in this agressive misogynistic way?

SnotMeReally · 17/03/2013 14:22

I think that card is a disgrace. It has nothing at all to do with cards for dog lovers and everything to do with smut and men who think of women as objects.

I agree with all those who say crap like this is normalising and making acceptable derogatory sexist remarks and behaviour - and we wonder why men think it is OK to speak as they did to the lady in the chip shop thread (cheltenham race week, vile sexual innuendo being spoken to a stranger). Anyone who dares to complain is told they have sense of humour! My DDs are 13 and 11 and it terrifies me what sort of world they are growing up in.

It is not funny. Tesco should be ashamed of themselves.

SnotMeReally · 17/03/2013 14:26

soverylucky - the only thing I disagree with you on is the bit where you say
expecting to see a nice looking woman inside the card - a nice looking woman (ie pretty, nicely dressed?) is not IMO what is being alluded to - it conjures up an image of a scantily clad girl in a provocative pose, all boobs and pouting in a "come and get it boys" porn mag style, IMO

SnotMeReally · 17/03/2013 14:28

oops, my 14:22 post is missing a vital NO in the sense of humour sentence! Blush

ReluctantBeing · 17/03/2013 14:45

I think the 'dim' people would be those letting their children look at cards in the area with the aforementioned title.

Original poster
ChipTheFish · 17/03/2013 14:50

ReluctantBeing It is in the 'Humour' section of a greeting cards stand in a supermarket. It isn't a place where parents or anybody would assume to see misogynist shit like this.

OP posts:
Original poster
ChipTheFish · 17/03/2013 14:54

I have added a picture of the card to my profile.

OP posts:
AmandaPayneNeedsaHoliday · 17/03/2013 14:56

It won't let me click on your profile. Have you made it public?

soverylucky · 17/03/2013 14:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 17/03/2013 15:01

I work for a supplier to Tesco and Tesco are very sensitive (at least in my line of work) about being seen as family friendly retailers. Although you would hardly think that from looking at the magazines & cards section so maybe that category is run differently. I think a complaint would definitely see results. Coincidentally a friend of mine has just FB posted a picture of another nasty misogynist greeting card available at Tesco. I would definitely complain.

Thanks too to all the people coming on to explain that the word 'bitch' also means 'female dog'. Us pearl-clutching humourless types really would not have known that otherwise. Hmm

AmandaPayneNeedsaHoliday · 17/03/2013 15:07

Oh, I can see it now. Even worse that I imagined. Horrid, really horrid.

HarrietSchulenberg · 17/03/2013 15:29

For all those of you who think this isn't offensive: how about if I pop out at you next time you're in a supermarket and call you or your dd a "filthy little bitch"?

lljkk · 17/03/2013 16:01

Context is everything, Harriet. Calling a child a rude word is extreme.

I presume that bitch as a verb is just as objectionable? So no bitching about things in general. Obviously never confess to "cocking" things up, or having a "bastard" day at work or confide that your SIL is a "witch" or FIL is a "dick". "Talking bollocks" would be a rather outrageous accusation, too. If someone else used language like that you all would definitely call them on it as unacceptable sexism, too. Sure you would. Hmm

None of you ever posted on the "Shallow but I think Oscar Pistorious is fit!" thread, too. Since you mentioned treating people as objects.

What next, we can't accuse someone behaving immaturely of being "childish" because that's derogatory to children?

pigletmania · 17/03/2013 16:03

I dont see a problem with this, as long as there is a male equivalent