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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be utterly disgusted with the father on Child of our Time?

76 replies

Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 21:27

Who "had a phobia of needles" so he fucked off the Scotland and eventually shagged someone else because he "couldnt deal with it". Thereby, making his affair, him breaking up the family and breaking his wife and his childs heart, the fault of his child who got diabetes.

Even as he was speaking I thought "YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!!! Even after all this time you are making excuses!"

"Looking back, possibly it wasnt the best thing to do"

Oh, you think?!

OP posts:
Sirzy · 28/02/2013 21:28

The poor child, I'm recording it so not seen yet but I hope he hasn't told the child that?

Original poster
Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 21:30

The kid pretty much knows that yes. Although I think that is possibly to do with the mother who admitted that she really struggled to hold it together and once the kids caught her cutting up his shirts.

He said that his dad had an affair and then defended his dad saying that he tried his best. Not impressed with the mother either tbh, but the father is a cowardly shit head.

OP posts:
hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 28/02/2013 21:31

That's just an editted snapshot though. How can we judge without the full facts?

ShatnersBassoon · 28/02/2013 21:32

Yeah, the insulin made him do it Confused

He's obviously a massive slackbrain. The kid seems to have sussed him out though. Glad his mum's new partner seems like a decent sort.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 21:32

Hell because he admitted it? That was enough for me.

OP posts:
hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 28/02/2013 21:37

I'd still like to know how much of that conversation was left on the cutting room floor though.

lisad123everybodydancenow · 28/02/2013 21:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 21:41

Yes, his dad admitted that he couldnt cope and took a job that meant he worked away so he didnt have to deal with the diabetes, which led to him having an affair.

I did say "eventually"

And even taking the affair out of the equation, running away and leaving your wife to cope alone with something you dont want to deal with is shitty and cowardly in the extreme. Seems to me that the diabetes was just an excuse for running away when life got a bit tough.

Forget the affair, the guy is still a shit, especially to be still making excuses about it.

OP posts:
Rushyswife · 28/02/2013 22:31

Yanbu that part made me cry. The little boyooked so vulnerable.
What about lovely Eve whose mum died? She is such a lovely girl! Wept and wept through her section!

Rushyswife · 28/02/2013 22:32

Sorry boy looked
Stupid iPhone!

thekidsrule · 28/02/2013 22:35

not impressed with the mother bloody hell her life had shattered in front of her and she cut some shirts up Shock

SashaSashays · 28/02/2013 22:37

I think yabu, you've seen a snapshot on a tv show, you clearly don't know the full story.

He started working away when the boy was visibly young, he had an affair when the boy was 10. It stated the mother had depression and the relationship broke down over the time he worked away. I'm not defending his actions but I think you don't have any reason to be so worked up.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 22:37

I am not impressed with the fact that she really doesnt seem to have protected him from it. She told him that his father had an affair, she needn't have done that.

I have been cheated on, and there is nothing that would make me tell the kids what really happened at least, until they are adults and able to understand.

OP posts:
NotADragonOfSoup · 28/02/2013 22:38

I'd still like to know how much of that conversation was left on the cutting room floor though.

I agree.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 22:38

He admitted that he chose to work away because he couldnt deal with the diabetes and used the needles as an excuse. I reserve the right to be angry with a coward who would abandon his depressed wife and his children when it got a bit tough.

OP posts:
SashaSashays · 28/02/2013 22:40

We all parent differently. I told my child when his father had an affair, what exactly is the problem with that, aside from it being a different parenting choice?

TallulahTwinkle · 28/02/2013 22:41

I think you need to not be so outraged.

Yes, it is sad for the family concerned.

TallulahTwinkle · 28/02/2013 22:42

Walk a mile and all that...we only know what they have shown us.

ifancyashandy · 28/02/2013 22:44

You can cut elements of a conversation from an interview but you cannot change the narrative / remove elements that alter the meaning when editing. Lawyers will have gone over this with a fine toothed comb due to the fact it involves a minor. They may well have asked to see the transcript.

The 'real' story will not be on the cutting room floor. Producers have to abide by both OFCOM & BBC rules on this.

MrsJREwing · 28/02/2013 22:45

At least he admitted it.

My exh fucked off with ow when he couldn't cope with dc symptoms, he lied about affair, lied about me, and tortured us.

thekidsrule · 28/02/2013 22:46

the boy was 10 when the dad had an affair

the mother would clearly be upset for along time i should imagine

what should she of done,lied to the boy?

DonderandBlitzen · 28/02/2013 22:46

I reserve the right to be angry with a coward who would abandon his depressed wife and his children when it got a bit tough.

Yes totally agree with that, but then my own dad had a hell of a lot to deal with with my mum and he stuck by us through it all and didn't bugger off with someone else. So I guess I have high expectations of fathers!

Original poster
Bogeyface · 28/02/2013 22:48

Ok I agree that I am not being fair on the mother, I suppose I projecting there. Sorry.

But I stand by everything I have said about the father.

OP posts:
onthemetro · 28/02/2013 22:49

I cried loads during the two episodes, mostly during the section with the grandparents that had always been close to one of the boys, but the grandmother had to go into a home because of her Parkinson's...I'm welling up just thinking about how sad the granddad looked Sad

And Eve's bit was so sad too, but she's such a lovely girl with such a great head on her shoulders. I love COMT, I remember watching the first episodes Smile

DioneTheDiabolist · 28/02/2013 22:52

YAB totally U.

If you believe that the intricacies of this couple's marital break-up was com