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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To think it is ridiculous that a woman with 11 kids is getting a £400,000 house for nowt

999 replies

angelos02 · 19/02/2013 09:59

Especially when most working people couldn't never afford to live somewhere costing that much?
Link: www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2280385/Home-fit-dole-queen-Mother-11-gets-BRAND-NEW-400-000-house-built-council-shes-struggling-current-homes.html

OP posts:
Seabird72 · 19/02/2013 14:49

It's not unsafe housing - it's 2 houses knocked together by one door - I agree with her statement that there is a safety aspect because she lives in one house with her older children living in the second house and only having one door to connect the two is inconvenient although the elder children are in fact adults and the eldest daughter has a child or two of her own (paper mentions woman has 2 grandchildren living there but only mentions elder daughter having one child??) - the elder daughter should ideally have moved out to her own home to give that family more space. It is the woman's attitude that stinks but also apparently the neighbours can't wait until she moves out so that suggests that it's not just the mother who is unpleasant - let's face it - how many people on this site actually do live next door to a large family? I live on a council estate with several large families and their general attitude is have lots of kids and then kick them out to roam the streets at all hours collecting ASBO's like medals of honour - I suspect all the people who comment on this thread along the lines of "how dare you judge these people - they have a right to claim a beautiful, specifically built home on benefits" either claim benefits themselves and think that if you disagree with this then you must disagree with people receiving benefits fullstop (which I don't - there are plenty of people who clearly need benefits to survive) or the other half probably live in nice houses well away from council/HA estates and don't suffer the kind of problems we do. It's a case of well let's throw money at these people and hope they stay away from me.

countrykitten · 19/02/2013 14:49

I would be interested to see a link to the stats on that Amberleaf - link?

Nancy66 · 19/02/2013 14:50

She pays nothing towards the house. How is that not free?

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 19/02/2013 14:50

Country They already have to go to "courses" that expect this but they just have them sit there on computers all day Hmm. These things are already happening.

The system in place doesn't help people get back into work, I believe it makes it harder in some ways.

JakeBullet · 19/02/2013 14:51

I hate the "dole queen" comments in the article. My exSIL once referred to me as a "benefits queen" Hmm. Apart from the past year I have worked non stop since 1982 so was mightily pissed off with her.

AmberLeaf · 19/02/2013 14:51

stats on what? how many benefit claimants are involved in community volunteering?

I doubt you'd find any as they wouldnt make a jot of difference to employment figures.

Or are you doubting that it happens?

Seabird72 · 19/02/2013 14:52

another point is why THIS family - there are lots of families on benefits who will never get to live in a home that has been specifically designed for them (we'll just ignore the fact that there are millions living in houses that they're paying the rent or mortgage on themselves but can't afford to move due to lack of finances because the thread is about this particular woman and her attitude)

Chattymummyhere · 19/02/2013 14:53

The holidays have not been recent but they where while on benefits so cheaper then than what they would cost now but still costly I know one of them was paid for part by a compo claim for an injury one of them got while on a uk holiday for a week. However that first holiday to get injured cost around £800 anyway. Then the top up on the compo for one of the holidays was around £600 and the second holiday cost 2k.. Spending money they make sure is a min of £100 per day

I'm not sure exactly what they claim I've never asked the names but have gone though bills with them which I why I no their out goings

countrykitten · 19/02/2013 14:53

I am merely wondering where you get your information from on this - just because you say/assume something does not make it true does it?

countrykitten · 19/02/2013 14:54

In fact I think that the DM has been criticised for the very same thing on this very thread....

JakeBullet · 19/02/2013 14:55

Can I add to the stats? I am a Carer so claim Carers Allowance and Income Support etc. I volunteer as a Parent Supporter for an education charity. We offer courses for families who might have been out of education for some time. They are fun courses designed to build confidence and get people out if the house, several people have used them as stepping stones into further education or work. My volunteer role is more around befriending families going through difficult times....whatever the reasons for this.

OverlyYappy · 19/02/2013 14:55

I am in an eco house. It's lovely and warm and I haven't had to put my heating up full all winter.

I did feel a tiny bit bad as my house is huge and there are only 3 of us, we have a bedroom each, I do however have to pay 14% of my £72.00 per week rent soon as one child is not 16 yet and they are same sex.

I worry more about the job I have to get to pay my rent and council tax and be a single parent.

I have a complaint, I cannot have a HOT HOT bath. (Eco friendly shut off system)

There was a house built nearby 2 of these into one, the lady had 9 DC but some had moved out, she has trained herself via our Council and works now (was in the local newspapers)

My friend has 6 DC and although I can never understand it, it's a fantastic atmosphere at her house.

I haven't read the thread so best do so as it's quote long....

OverlyYappy · 19/02/2013 14:56

I have PTSD btw Would give anything not to have it and to have a normal functioning brain that is capable of work.

AmberLeaf · 19/02/2013 14:57

Im not assuming anything, Im talking from actual personal experience.

I have been involved [while on benefits] in several community projects/services, all done off my own back for 'free' I was not the only person doing it whos circumstances were the same as mine either.

Various things that were for the benefit of all working and non working, old and young.

Who else do you think has the time to do these things?

Is that enough or would you like me to pm you exact examples?

AmberLeaf · 19/02/2013 14:58

There you go, JakeBullet gives another perfect example.

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 19/02/2013 14:58

Country I am on ESA and DP is on my claim, I have been told I will be expected to go to workfare even though I am considered unfit for work. DP goes to these courses, so I do know.

We have both volunteered.

Chattymummyhere · 19/02/2013 14:58

What can help those who want to help them selfs is the drop in centres that run computer/English and maths courses. Although the only people who seem to turn up are the elderly bless them. I volunteered at one for a few months between my own college courses lovely places but sadly under used

countrykitten · 19/02/2013 14:59

That sounds fabulous but your personal experience and anecdotal evidence does not mean that this is widespread does it?

Orwellian · 19/02/2013 14:59

YANBU at all! Completely nuts and just shows you can earn a better living having children than working hard and following a career path. Also makes me wonder why they are teaching kids that hard work = house, car etc when actually this woman has got it all by basically doing nothing except having sex.

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 19/02/2013 15:00

Considering the place I volunteered was a youth service I have seen that there are many other people in the same circumstances. :)

countrykitten · 19/02/2013 15:00

That was to Amberleaf btw.

JakeBullet · 19/02/2013 15:00

Sorry Chatty but they HAVE to be getting money in from elsewhere. No way are they doing all that just on benefits....no way, I know this as I am having to live on benefits at the moment. I cannot even afford a holiday never mind £100 a day if I could get somewhere. The last holiday I had was paid for by my in laws and included all food. Even then I didn't have £100 a day to spend on lunch or any other things...a fact I had to explain again and again to DS who being autistic takes time to understand.

I am not saying I am living hand to mouth...we manage but there are no extras at all. Any luxuries I have are from my years of work....but I would not be able to replace them if they broke.

AmberLeaf · 19/02/2013 15:00

It is widespread though, as I say who else do you think has time to do these things? I know lots of people involved with this sort of thing.

BridgetBidet · 19/02/2013 15:02

My husband grew up in Ireland in the 1970s and he always gets a bit perplexed about this. Large families were common and it was normal to make do with bunkbeds and 4 to a room, one of the extra reception rooms was often turned into a bedroom. Didn't do them any harm. I think there is a difference between accommodation which is genuinely harmful eg damp, insanitary, unheated and accommodation which is simply not what the claimant wants in an ideal world.

I think that building a house so that there is no more than two children to a room and a selection of reception rooms is going a bit overboard to be honest. I think if you choose to have a family that large you need to accept the fact that it's going to be a bit cramped and the kids will have to share.

countrykitten · 19/02/2013 15:04

I think that there are dangers in over generalising from our own experiences Amberleaf and as I have said, your anecdotal evidence is meaningless in the context of the whole of the UK.

To draw any sort of conclusion from that would be as ridiculous as drawing any sort of meaningful conclusions about all benefit claimants from the woman in the DM story - two sides of the same coin.