Not wanting to be invited to a lunch if there is someone I don't talk to?

[Neverland2013]

I will try to keep it short. I had a big fall out with one of the mums from our 'mumsgroup' over a year ago. In the past, during a B'day party, I managed to be civil to this person but I am rather annoyed that one of my friends invited me as well as the other person to a Saturday lunch although she knows how I feel.

Hully. I am with you. I regret on here that trusting other peoplemis een as hopelessly naive and old fashioned.minwouldn't do what the firend did, therefore i would feel hurt if it was done to me. Can't imagine any of my friends doing that to me.

Blimey.

That was possibly the most incoherent post i have ever done. Bloody ipad sausage fingers..

The upshot was: do as you would be done by

I'm not calling you a bully earlier

I said that she spending up ostracized from her group despite doing nothing wrong, just as so often it is the bullied child that leaves the school

she is ending up

yy James, damn phpne

Yes...I suppose you are right Hully.

Completely agree Hully. I find it sad that anyone thinks thats ok. Whatever happened to friendship and being honest with people.

Mary, she told het friend, the friend bought the house

Earlierintheweek,you seem to think your way of non-disclosure of information like this in a chat with a friend is the norm,it actually isn't. I'd wager that most people would feel safe discussing such details with a friend,which the OP genuinely considered the other woman to be.

Your ex-friend is a sly arse,OP.You're better off being away from her,how could you possibly ever feel free to discuss anything without being aware she is listening and possibly figuring out how she can use that info to her own advantage.?

You don't need a doctor,you need some new friends.

(*earlierintheweek,some of your posts towards the op could also be considered rude and vulgar,perhaps you should read all that 'manners' manual???)

earlier, you are entitled to your world view, bit it is a mighty depressing one

I think my pov is not focusing on the friendship as much as the house itself. Having house hunted myself, I have never allowed myself to get too emotionally involved in a property until completion. I see it as pretty cut throat tbh.

Well if it had been me instead of the OP I wouldn't have spilled my guts.

But the other family might have bought the house anyway.

I think the fact Neverland has avoided answering all the questions is that she wasn't gazumped at all.
Neverland did you put an offer in? Did you then go higher? There seems to be a lot your not telling us.
Maybe your friends think you're being petty and don't want to get involved.

shes not being a drama queen

she is hurt by the first friend

and then lack of consideration from the second

But she's being a drama queen over very little.

but its not little to the op. It wouldn't be to me either. Very harsh to disregard her feelings in such a flippant manner. Treat others as you want to be treated yourself.

Pictish - that's how I feel. Until the deeds are done, as it were, it's not a done deal. I wouldn't lose sleep. And haven't when buying houses in the past. Been outbid and done outbidding, once even by and with a man who played football with my then husband. We lost. So did they. A cash buyer trumped us both.

it is irrelevant whether she had offered or not

she had told het friend of her interest and intention and was entitled to expect her to respect that

in a decent world

if it was all so fine and great, why didn't the friend tell her she was going to whack a higher offer on?

I think the OP is dwelling on this far too much a year later by demanding that her friends choose. The danger is they won't choose her. But I honestly wouldn't have lost a minute of sleep over it - it happens when you're buying a house.

And yes my attitude to discussing money and personal things may be old fashioned. I don't particularly care about that - it's my attitude, it's what I'm comfortable with and in this sort of situation it would have served me well.

the fact she said nothing, despite meverland telling her of her interest, says it all, sneaky slyboots

your friend treated you very badly and you were right to end the friendship.

my god, where are people's ethics???

it does seem like the others just want a quiet life. i've seen this so many times: group of friends, one treats someone like shit, the other friends shrug their shoulders, 'not our business blah blah', shat on friend gets sidelined. shit friend continues to be included in group of spineless shitty friends.

move on op. i like the sound of you. want to meet for coffee?

she isn't demanding

I think you are trying to pit her on the wrong to justify your own dog eat dog outllok