To refuse to pick dd's friend up from her dance class tomorrow?

[stormforce10]

Just had a call from DD friend's mum asking if I could pick up her DD and look after her after dance class for an hour or so as she has to take her DS to a birthday party.

Normally I wouldn't hesitate BUT last time I did that for this particular mum she turned up for her DD over 3 1/2 hours late and her explanation was that as both children were at friends she and her DH had decided to go out for lunch. No response to phone calls or text messages and I was desperately trying not to let on to her DD that I was getting worried something terrible had happened. That was 6 months ago but I was so angry with her I still haven't forgotten it let alone her DD's tears when she realised mummy wasn't coming when she said(6 years old)

I managed to say "sorry I can't we're busy tomorrow" and she's come back with a text message saying "please please please I've asked lots of people and they can't either really need someone or I won't be able to take DS to party and he'll be really upset".

What the hell do I text back now. I really like the little girl but I don't want to be taken advantage of again in this way let alone deal with the upset. I'm guessing if lots of other people can't (? won't) do it I'm not the only one she's done this to.

I feel sorry for the inconsiderate mum's DD. She will never get asked for a sleepover by anyone and all her awful mum's fault.

Where on earth have you seen a scarf depicting owls copulating?

Of course... This is Mumsnet :)

My mum would be terrified of the owls one...she is scared of small fluttery things
Anyway, I ahve never got the knack of scarves, apart from wooly ones tied in a huge knot when it's cold

scarf with attitude

Oh, I have a friend who would go ape over that scarf!

That was a brilliant text op. absolutely loved it. These people get away with because they are allowed to, no one has a go at them and tells them no, love those stories where you do.

There is a mum at my dd's school, apparently you can tell when she's gearing up to ask you a favour because she'll insist on doing you one first (whether you need it or not) or be all nicey nicey to you. If you are unable to do what she was after all along, she blanks you until next time. I've not been aske duet, am feeling snubbed

No to the skull scarf, I'm 32!

In order to stop hijack - link to thread about new Mumsnet scarf :)

STDG I would be well up for that. I could be a verbal exocet if I never had to see the people again. It's the years in the school playground bit that makes me wibble

Gossip gossip gossip

I had a VERY interesting conversation with X earlier when I rung to thank her for having DD.

Guess what? She had partymum's dd a couple of months ago after dance class at partymums request. Partymum turned up to collect nearly 3 hours late without a word of apology saying she'd been shopping.

X's dd is at the same school as partymum's dd (my dd is at different school) and apparently she's done this to quite a few families including on one occasion telephoning at 7pm when she was already 2 hours late to ask if her dd could stay the night as it wasn't worth picking her up now so she may as well go to school with her friend in the morning!!

Poor little girl I feel really really sorry for her. Almost wish we'd had her just so I could scoop her up and give her a cuddle :(

Love the idea of a mumsnet task force. I want to tell Freddie's mummy what I think of her

Oh that's awful. Please don't do as others suggested and make sure your dd and x's gloat in front of her?
Do the parents love her as far as you can tell?

SPB - I don't know if you're talking about what I said but I wasn't for a minute suggesting that the children should be involved! Really - I don't think anyone would. That would be massively unkind and unwarranted

I don't think anyone has suggested involving the children

There was "Be sure to have DD skip up to X DD on Monday and gush about their playdate in front of UserMum." although that didn't suggest doing it in front of partymum's DD.

Sad OP :(
Just wondering, with the texting at 4 am etc, do you think there might be alcohol abuse or something similar in this picture?

So as we suspected, she's done it to nearly everyone else and alienated them all, used up all her "chances". Stupid stupid woman, and poor little girl. :(

How sad for the little girl. No wonder she was so upset when her mum was a no show (again) at yours.

The little girl of partymum must feel really insecure with her mother dumping her all the time and not turning up to get her that must actually be so upsetting for her.

The kids must be used to it - this behaviour isn't going to be a first. Still, it's not stormfront's problem.

Yes, it sounds like the parents are a bit crap. But looking after the children when the parents can't be arsed to isn't going to build their self-esteem. It's just going to legitimise the parents

No I agree kiri I wasn't saying the OP should 'take pity' on the dd and look after her.

I just think it's a bloody shame. That little girl must be constantly on edge waiting to be collected and feel really unwanted.

I was the little girl constantly at clubs and at people's houses uninvited because my parents didnt like me much. It turned me into a very needy young adult; constantly after reassurance and praise.

No sorry, wasn't taking issue with any one poster, and at the time I read those comments (you weren;t the only one to say that sort of thing IIRC) I was nodding along. But having read the update I just feel so sorry for the little girl.