Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse to pick dd's friend up from her dance class tomorrow?

504 replies

stormforce10 · 08/02/2013 12:16

Just had a call from DD friend's mum asking if I could pick up her DD and look after her after dance class for an hour or so as she has to take her DS to a birthday party.

Normally I wouldn't hesitate BUT last time I did that for this particular mum she turned up for her DD over 3 1/2 hours late and her explanation was that as both children were at friends she and her DH had decided to go out for lunch. No response to phone calls or text messages and I was desperately trying not to let on to her DD that I was getting worried something terrible had happened. That was 6 months ago but I was so angry with her I still haven't forgotten it let alone her DD's tears when she realised mummy wasn't coming when she said(6 years old)

I managed to say "sorry I can't we're busy tomorrow" and she's come back with a text message saying "please please please I've asked lots of people and they can't either really need someone or I won't be able to take DS to party and he'll be really upset".

What the hell do I text back now. I really like the little girl but I don't want to be taken advantage of again in this way let alone deal with the upset. I'm guessing if lots of other people can't (? won't) do it I'm not the only one she's done this to.

OP posts:
LemonBreeland · 09/02/2013 08:25

Wow there are so many of them out there. Rooney it was nice of the other Mum to give you a heads up on yours.

LtEveDallas · 09/02/2013 08:27

Just be careful she doesn't try to turn this against you, you know the type of thing - how rude, how unhelpful etc.

Do you have good friends that know about last time? If not, you may need to get some people on side.

(Well done though, hopefully it will make TCM2 think twice in the future)

SpringBulbs · 09/02/2013 08:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

girlsyearapart · 09/02/2013 08:36

Wow well done op.
Very good text.

I have a friend like this & have to be very firm with her.

I was taking my nieces to a theme park for their birthday and she wanted to invite her dd along even though she would be at work so would either leave her with me to take for the day or come & leave early.

I said no its not an outing for dd and her friends it's a family outing I can't manage that many children. I had already got the younger two at grandparents for the day & didn't want to increase numbers!

I was told her dd had cried and sobbed ALL weekend cos she hadn't been included..

Given that my dd does not go to the same school as hers & they only knew about it as we drove up to the gates of the theme park & the only conversation about it was via text the dd would only have known about it if her mum had told her..

NotSoNervous · 09/02/2013 08:36

Well done OP Grin I wish I'd seen her face when she got reply

My money is on there being no party

PurplePidjin · 09/02/2013 08:40

Op, I'm impressed! I used to have a friend (years ago, before i met dp let alone had dc) who would ask me to look after her 9yo so she could go for a drink (hard working single mum) until one night she rocked up at 6am coked off her head. I bitterly regret not reporting to SS, but was young and naive Sad

Original poster
stormforce10 · 09/02/2013 08:40

OK received a very strange passive aggressive response that came in around 4am Hmm.

"Thanks for letting me know you can't help today. Sorry for troubling you. I will ask X, maybe she'll be more helpful. Regards Y"

DH wont take any nonsense. If hes asked to take any of the children from ballet as sometimes does happen at last minute, he always says - I've just got to phone stormforce first to check as she's in charge. DP is well trained Smile

OP posts:
Hissy · 09/02/2013 08:41

Text back 'Don't contact me again'

the utter bitch. those poor children.

NotADragonOfSoup · 09/02/2013 08:43

Well done!

Hissy · 09/02/2013 08:43

Oh and if you have X's number...... text her a head up! Grin

Rockchick1984 · 09/02/2013 08:43

Op she sounds like a nutter!

giraffesCantEatNHSPotatoes · 09/02/2013 08:44

"maybe she will be more of a pushover"

fryingpantoface · 09/02/2013 08:44

What a cow. I second the ",don't contact me again"

DuchessFanny · 09/02/2013 08:45

4am ????

NotADragonOfSoup · 09/02/2013 08:45

TExt back make sure you don't piss X off by swanning off for an afternoon with your DH then. Otherwise you won't have anyone left to help

Wink
FamiliesShareGerms · 09/02/2013 08:45

I think this is the point to ignore her texts...

GwendolineMaryLacey · 09/02/2013 08:48

Well bloody done!

TobyLerone · 09/02/2013 08:49

This thread delivers.

Don't text her back.

Coconutty · 09/02/2013 08:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 09/02/2013 08:50

How did I miss the update? Confused

Cheeky cow. Who the hell does she think she is?

SpringBulbs · 09/02/2013 08:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PurplePidjin · 09/02/2013 08:51

Text back "Glad to hear you've found someone x" The kiss at the end is very passive aggressive important

Original poster
stormforce10 · 09/02/2013 08:51

I was thinking in bed last night that when dd was 3 I had a situation when another mum was about 5 hours late picking up her dd from us. The difference?

  1. She phoned - 3 times very apologetically and I agreed to keep her dd as long as necessary
  2. Her 6 year old ds have fallen and broken his wrist and they were sitting in A&E all that time
  3. She turned up with a box of chocolates, a ds in plaster and endless apologies.
  4. She offered to have dd for an afternoon a couple of weeks later.

We are still really good friends and look after each others children quite a bit.

Feeling all cross this morning. Poor ds had another bad night so I did too. DP has jjust taken dd to ballet I wonder what will happen next. I'm glad this is such a source of entertainment to you all Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
stormforce10 · 09/02/2013 08:52

and I'm not texting her back. Had enough now

OP posts:
CaseyShraeger · 09/02/2013 08:53

Amazing how yesterday she just had to keep badgering you because she'd asked soooo many other people and none of them could do it, whereas this morning she can just move on to "asking X".