To ask why do people 'loud parent'

[ElevenCent]

This woman from my NCT group does it all the time with her DS when we all meet for coffee and it's just ridiculous. She literally verbalises every thing they do with a question at the end and some sort of lesson. Eg mummy can't find her phone in her handbag can she James? Phone, James, PHONE. We ring daddy on the phone don't we? / Mummy is going to get you a rice cake, isn't she James? But we only have three left don't we, till we get to the shops. One, two, three. Shops. SHOPS.

I do engage with DD, naturally, but nowhere near on this level!

Sorry, I know this isn't a new topic, but it is so ridiculous. A couple of times I've echoed it with "what is mummy going to do tonight DD, drink gin, that's right, GIN. What does mummy like with her gin? Tonic, that's
right isn't it DD? But she might need to have it neat tonight, isn't that right?" however she is usually too absorbed in explaining to him why coffee is hot, HOT, and why it is sometimes in a mug MUG, sometimes in a cup CUP and why only mummies MUM-MIES drink coffee and not babies BABIES and why and why and why and why and why

Even my non-verbal ds managed to master yodelling.

It is a very under-estimated skill.

saskia is tackling french slowly, non-fluent but maybe fluent by P1,otherwise how will she say croissant in an exaggerated manner

Saying croissant should be natural by now, Scottish, I am worried that you aren't taking Saskia to Costa cafe often enough.

doesnt say it say it like a parisian,low guttural tones evocative of gauloises and black coffee

But surely one should only expose one's precious dahhhhrlings to small independent tea shops?

independent only, yes selling free trade over priced artisan wares
places that reek of jo malone,were the prams are reassuringly big and expensive
and even thoiugh one can say croissant,no one eats em.transfatty poison to weans

But Manic, our independent tea room is too small and we can't fit our Bugaboos!!

And you must try these wonderful homemade biscuits. They are made from organic, artisan, free trade sawdust and beetles.

gosh yes my fleet of bugaboo in all colours palette and reassuringly expensive
well simply block the door,and or pavement with bugaboo.what everyone else does

'Loud parenting' to me is about what you're saying. If it's 'let's phone Daddy and tell him we need more milk' it's just the general narration thing that's good for child development.

Noisy parenting is 'No, put that one down darling, we have the organic hummus don't we!' We wouldn't want all those nasty chemicals in our food.' Or 'Look at the lovely picture. It's quite like the nice Manet we saw at the gallery isn't it darling?'

I do to my dd 5 who as ASD e. g well dine good waiting, or do you want orange juice or water (loudly)

Exactly Narked-I can't see why people can't tell the difference. The child certainly can-they get the 'glazed over look' with the performance parenting. It also stops when the parent comes to the realisation that it isn't achieving anything.

loud parenting is the unnecessary arent we sooo v clever commentary.
Hummus darling,like we had in turkey.do say Hagia Sophia again saskia
no hagia sofia ok,lin-gwee-knee for mummy

I experienced performance parenting at the year 2 Christmas party - 'Oh no [insert precious child's name] we don't have anything with additives. Here's some yummy organic breadsticks and homemade hummus'. All said very loudly, while her poor dd looked mortified at having a very small cup cake snatched from her hands.

exotic but if I want to talk about art, sushi or nutrition with my child then I can! don't care if people judge. I want my DC to understand more than hop, hop goes the frigging froggy.

I don't talk too loudly but yes...I might mention "Not that one, we have the organic one....in the green packet." as I'm educating them about how to eat and shop.

my kids went to a party was all hummus,carrots.asked loudly for cake and chocolate
even worse when offered a baked unflavoured crisp imposter. cried for pom bears
went to macdonaolds afterwards.for additives, and hydrogenated fats

Never heard of loud parenting before- I definitely talk a lot to dd... Really hope people don't think I do it for anyone else's benefit other than dd's. Mind you, I've got quite a quiet voice so hopefully no one hears me when I'm walking down the street singing twinkle twinkle [thinking of all the times of done that and cringing]

Good for you, Scottish.

It's all fair enough to feed children well but to deny cake at a birthday party is barbaric. Their kids will go mad for 'forbidden' food as soon as they are old enough and stuff themselves with cake.

I think that singing Twinkle Twinkle is very sweet.
Explaining a 10 months old how to wrap sushi... Well... !

at party no cake,no chocolate.but really nice home made fruit ice lolly though
but no the mum doesn't do cake,chocolate,it was all dips and crudities
her kids up to her! just mine have expectation of something from m&s thats chocolate

Good on you Scottish . A party without proper party food is not a good party imo

Oh god! An ex friend who i had the misfortune of bumping into was doing this recently. "oh wingey wingey wingey, we don't like wingey do we? No we don't, we don't like wingey wingey wingey noise . . . " and on and on and on. The wingeing was actually fairly quiet and unobtrusive but the bloody woman saying so loud that she didn't like wingey wingey wingey was much more annoying! Was so loud no one could concentrate on what we were talking about and eventually all just stopped and sighed.

Winge hating woman is an arsehole generally though.

Twinkle twinkle is lovely but if you were really on the ball you'd have incorporated a rhyme about how to make sushi to the tune.

how slack you didn't sing twinkle in french.you clearly dont care enough

My loud parenting is put in use when trying to get ds round the supermarket without being nagged for magazine/sweets/toys.
"Right, go and get a baggy and get me 4 carrots. Over there, look, carrots. Four. THANK YOU!!"
"Now, where are the eggs? I can never remember. Over there? Show me then"
etc.
I get him to help me pack the shopping too. It's not showy offy, it's just a distraction technique.
My sister does the constant narration thing though. Everything is a lesson. Her children are immaculately behaved though. unlike mine!