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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be judgy pants about people that have tattoos and keep getting more, especially women??

532 replies

dontsqueezetheteabag · 28/01/2013 09:08

I hate tattoos. Whilst I appreciate everyone has a right to their own taste and choices I still cannot get over the fact that people have them in places where they are visible.

A colleague of mine has just returned to work after M leave with a horrific tattoo from her wrist to her elbow. How can she go out and meet clients looking like that?? It can be seen through tops and obviously below short sleeved tops.

What I really don't like is seeing lovely brides on their wedding days, strapless dresses and tattoos on their upper arms and backs..... urgh!!!!!!

Anyone else with me??

OP posts:
LtEveDallas · 31/01/2013 11:18

I can far more understand paying hundreds of pounds for a good tattoo than for a Burberry handbag

Oh yes, yes. I supposed I meant "relatively" expensive, like your example (and should have pointed out that mine are over 20 years old now, so cheap by todays standards!)

Dahlen · 31/01/2013 11:23

I don't have any tattoos nor any desire to get one. I think some look really cheap and nasty while others are incredibly artistic and beautiful. I'm afraid I would make assumptions about someone with LOVE/HATE stamped across their knuckles, or a dagger dripping in blood on their forearm, but I'd be just as likely to admire a well-crafted, interesting and unique tattoo.

Ultimately, people's choices in tattoos tell you something about that person, in just the same way as their choice of clothing, jewellery and hairstyle, etc. Which is, of course, the whole point in having them and something that has been characteristic of large parts of society since at least the Bronze Age.

No feelings about male/female either way.

chocoluvva · 31/01/2013 12:03

So, some tattoos would be acceptable in a professional situation and others wouldn't.

bringmeroses · 01/02/2013 10:05

David Beckham is a professional footballer and he's got plenty. I'd still go there. Heh heh.

Totally agree with the tattoo/hair, clothes in general analogy - a cheap tight outfit with bra straps and muffin top on display is not a good look whether you have a tatt or no. But a white collar employee could probably get away with any kind of tattoo if they were sufficiently polished/professional as appropriate to their industry.

Moistenedbint LOL at your name and post!

chocoluvva · 01/02/2013 10:51

I suspect the OP is, like me, not one of the younger MNers and therefore grew up with tattoos denoting hardness or a display of non-conformity. I'm amazed at how quickly they became so popular. I wasn't joking when I said I feel slightly scared of heavily tattooed people!

To generalise, younger people probably have no problems with tattoos in a professional environment as they're so widespread now, unless the particular tattoo is inconsistent with the nature of work.

AgathaF · 01/02/2013 11:37

How old are you choco?

I'm 45, so not one of the "younger MNers", but I don't have a problem with them.

MrsDeVere · 01/02/2013 15:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AgathaF · 01/02/2013 15:33

MrsDV Grin

chocoluvva · 01/02/2013 16:19

Wayhay - we need a quiche for posters who're 45! I'm 45 too.

I often think I have old-fashioned tastes - nothing necessarily wrong with being old-fashioned (defensive!) I'm quite liberal though.

Thinking about this thread I've come to the conclusion that the apprehension I have on meeting heavily tattooed people is because I think they're going to be very, very outgoing/forthright/uninhibited or something like that, which makes me uncomfortable as I'm shy - it's a that person's not like me thing - tribal theory again. I suppose I don't want people to know much about me until I'm ready.

MrsDeVere, when you get your tattoo will you welcome people asking you about it? I'd be very happy to hear the story of your tattoo. It's going to be a very special tattoo, but things like rock bands, peace/love, snakes, flowers etc.... well, I don't know what to say that would be appropriate.

MurderOfGoths · 01/02/2013 16:28

"Thinking about this thread I've come to the conclusion that the apprehension I have on meeting heavily tattooed people is because I think they're going to be very, very outgoing/forthright/uninhibited or something like that, which makes me uncomfortable as I'm shy"

I have 4 tattoos, planning a half sleeve and I am painfully shy! Grin

VestaCurry · 01/02/2013 16:34

I would never get a tattoo. Mainly because they will look grim on my old wrinkly body if I'm fortunate enough to live beyond 60.

Each to their own though.

EmmaBemma · 01/02/2013 16:36

choco, it's OK if you don't know what to say - you don't have to discuss someone's tattoos with them! Some people don't mind talking about their tattoos but others say it can get a bit annoying - it's probably the only thing that makes me reticent about getting more visible ink: dealing with people's curiosity, even if it's politely expressed.

AgathaF · 01/02/2013 16:48

Who'd have thought so many olds on MN?

chocoluvva · 01/02/2013 16:53

Oh. :) What a fantastic insight into 'people with tattoos'. OP - where have you gone?

I would just assume that a visible tattoo was there to be noticed, but I can completely see that questions/comments could be annoying if you're not in the mood.

Bunbaker · 01/02/2013 18:37

I'm 54 and when I was a teenager only very rough people had tattoos and it was practically unheard of for women to have them. It took MN and a couple of friends to make me realise that just about anyone can have a tattoo.

I still don't like the overdone look, but a discreet tattoo that can be hidden if required can be rather attractive. But I still don't like the bride with a strapless dress and tattoos look, sorry.

I wonder what all these heavily tattooed people will look like in their 80s and their tattoos have gone all wrinkly.

freddiefrog · 01/02/2013 18:39

I wonder what all these heavily tattooed people will look like in their 80s and their tattoos have gone all wrinkly.

I hope I'll have far more interesting things to do than worry about what my tattoos look like

GrumpyOldWomanToo · 01/02/2013 18:43

AgathaF:I'm 45, so not one of the "younger MNers"

I've got children older than you, and I grew in the era when tattoos were associated with sailors, bikers, and convicts. How times change.

I personally don't like to see tattoos, but no one cares what I like.

EmmaBemma · 01/02/2013 18:55

I love the way people regularly trot out that "what will you look like when you're 80" line as if they're the only person ever to have thought of it.

I imagine we'll look the same as other 80 year olds, except with tattoos? Just a wild guess. Actually I like tattoos on old people, but then I like tattoos.

what tattoos look like when you're 80

StuntGirl · 01/02/2013 19:02

Gosh yes Emma. I think I'll have far more pressing issues when I'm 80, if I make it that far, than some wrinkly tattoo!

My tattoos can grow old with me. I'm ok with that.

MrsKoala · 01/02/2013 19:17

I'm not keen on tattoos, mainly for the reason that they date you terribly. Everyone I know with a tatto will maintain they think theirs is unique, unusual etc. but they aren't they are all very specific to a period where a trend was fashionable. Therefore, they have a 'unique' Maori, Native American, Celtic, Chinese, stars on random places, etc design, whichever was the fashion at the time. They are also completely uninteresting, but used as some kind of a replacement for individuality or as a conversation piece.

They are more frequent now I know very few people without one, yet everyone with one feels they are unusual. It's a bit like apple products, they are so common yet still for some reason make people who own them feel they are some kind of counter culture rebel. Same with belly piercings - you are not an individual snowflake!

The current trend round here are tats of your babies names and dob in scrolly writing across your neck.

The thing which I can't stomach to look at - actually make me feel queasy - are the flesh tunnel earlobes. I don't know why, I just have a physical response to them.

I also have reservations about the cherry picking of 'exotic' cultures. In an 'ooh aren't I spiritual and mysterious with my inca tattoo' without any real understanding or care for the culture. Tattoo tourism.

Some tattoos are very beautiful tho and I do appreciate them from an aesthetic perspective.

AKissIsNotAContract · 01/02/2013 20:04

GrumpyOldWoman 'I've got children older than you, and I grew in the era when tattoos were associated with sailors, bikers, and convicts. How times change.'

Winston Churchill's mother had a tattoo as did quite a few members of the aristocracy in the 1900s. You can't be older than that surely?

EmmaBemma · 01/02/2013 20:16

"They are more frequent now I know very few people without one, yet everyone with one feels they are unusual. It's a bit like apple products, they are so common yet still for some reason make people who own them feel they are some kind of counter culture rebel."

I don't feel like a rebel, and nor do I feel particularly unusual. You make some rather confidently sweeping statements there! I think the length of this thread and the strong opinions expressed in it demonstrates that there is still a lot of prejudice against people with tattoos, so there is no doubt a counter-culture element to being tattooed, for some people. But for me I did it in spite of what my friends and family would think, not because of it! I would have infinitely preferred it to be no big deal to anyone else and I still would - but that sadly isn't the case.

That said, I can't disagree with your other aesthetic criticisms of some tattoos. They're not all equal, just as art on any other canvas is not all of equal value to everyone, and some wouldn't even consider it art -we all make our own judgements based on what speaks to us.

aoife24 · 01/02/2013 20:19

I saw an article in the DM about tatoos this week. It mentioned that some women have a kind of bra tatoo over their mastectomy scars and there was a photo of this. I thought it was a fabulous idea and for the first time ever have considered a tatoo. I even googled tattoo artists in the city where I live.

WoTmania · 01/02/2013 20:41

'Everyone I know with a tatto will maintain they think theirs is unique, unusual etc. but they aren't they are all very specific to a period where a trend was fashionable. Therefore, they have a 'unique' Maori, Native American, Celtic, Chinese, stars on random places, etc design, whichever was the fashion at the time'

Quite a few of my friends have, with their tattoo artist, designed absolutely unique, one of a kind tattoos incorporating symbols and images that are maningful to them and stages of their lives. I very much doubt you coudl date any of them from those tattoos.
I have no tattoos (I have flesh tunnels and facial piercing though :) ) but when I do I will likewise plan and design something that means something to me. When I am 80 I suspect I'll have other things to worry about than wrinkly tattoos.

MrsKoala · 01/02/2013 20:50

Well I think all art is of its time whether it intends to be timeless or not. We cannot help unconsciously reflecting the world around us. Also techniques and pigment must progress just like in other forms of art. Most forms feel they are incredibly modern and transcending time when in the moment, but on reflection become very dateable. Think Impressionism and deco for example. There is nothing wrong with being of your time either, I love. How fashion changes - I just wouldn't personally like it on my body or think I was the only person to discover the ability to not reflect my particular zeitgeist. We are all products of our environment and nothing is designed in a vacuum.