to think that having 8 DC by 3 different fathers may well have a detrimental impact on the DCs?

[StuckForAUserName]

Especially as the first two fathers are not in the picture anymore so the 3rd husband is bringing up someone else's 6 DC and then a further 2 have been added to the household .

The mother is effectively a single parent anyway as the latest DH is away a lot in the military. The oldest 3 are in boarding school though so there is only 5 DC full time at home. This is a middle class family btw not a family of 'benefit scroungers'. The mother states that 'her kids have a decent dad and will all be fine'. AIBU in thinking that it's terrible?

SPsFanjo,

No, but many do.

The rest of your statement makes no sense to the debate.

and what of the mothers that see benefits as meal ticket,dissposable fathers...as if this doesn't exist

So if you are not talking about single mothers what the hell are you on about? Do you even know?

Andro,

Trying to make the best of some God awful choices and paint it all as being 'the kids are happy' which roughly translates as I am happy and I don't care what anyone thinks as it suits me.

HillaryClitoris - unfortunately it wouldn't be the first time I'd seen a variation that theme.

I was responding Moomin,

It is commonly known as a debate.

During this discourse there have been suggestions of fathers dying, fathers walking away etc, why not mention the mothers that cut fathers out of childrens lives as if it isn't common place?

Thought the sp comment was referring to SPsFanjo for a moment there...

60 per cent of single parents work.

Hilary I agree there - there are women who cut the fathers out of their children's lives - but I would bet the vast majority of them have very good reason.

Of course there are always some exceptions.

and 70% of step family's fail within the first 2 years.

2/3rds of all fathers lose contact with their children within 2 years of seperation.

cue the zombie statistics

So you are talking about single mothers then, make your mind up

I find it very hard to judge the parent who is looking after the children. She is providing the home for them, they are looked after, so really what's the problem? I say this as a sm to 2 boys, whose birth mum has had 6 kids by 4 dads and left EVERY ONE of them with their dads, half of them before they turned 5 months old. Now if you want someone to judge, that's your woman! Not the one who looks after her children no matter what.

well, I am projecting. I'm one of eight, 2 dads, 4 mums, mum only marries when pregnant.

Dad had some of my siblings in a children's' home whilst others were in private school.

I left home at sixteen because there were babies in my bedrooms at both parents.

I married young, had planned children, left husband and didn't inflict a string of men on my children. I chose the wrong man. I have now settled down now they're grown.

I loved being a single mum and my children are happy. My parents were middle class and accepted by society. I, as a single parent was judged by the wifey whores.

So, yes I judge anybody who abandons their children and those who allow their children to be second or third class citizens in their own family.

Well,I think that is where we disagree, I do not believe that the majority of them do have good reason.

Are you going to now talk of Domestic Violence?

Moomin, I am talking about seperated families, what are you talking about?

Summer,

Good on your projecting.

On another note,

Katie Price's wedding seems to have gone well.

I would also hate my DCs to all have different surnames.

HillaryClitoris

My goodness,

So you have 2 kids, 2 fathers, but you wouldn't want different surnames?

Surely your kids could all take your surname? [bhmm]

I think that we have cross posted,

I apologise, you have a sense of humour that many don't seem to posses.

As if that would happen Rhonda.

Well surely no-one would give a child the surname Clitoris, what is the World Wide Web coming to!

Good luck to your Dear child Miss Camel Toe, idiot.

Why wouldn't that happen? Genuinely baffled.

Dahlen Just read your posts from this afternoon and I think they are fabulous. Thank you.