To ask if you would let a new boyfriend bathe your 7 year old daughter?

[TeenTwinsToddlerandTiaras]

A friend of mine did this and I am not suggesting anything untoward went on at all but I found it very odd.

This little girl has had to cope to witnessing DV and now has to cope with a new man in her life almost immediately that her father left. Now 'friend' has him bathing her and completely stripping away her dignity imo.

AIBU to give this 'friend' a piece of my mind?

[GregBishopsBottomBitch]

Why does a 7 year old need help washing herself, my 5 year old DD is perfectly capable, and i wouldnt want a strange man bathing my child.

[Asamumnonsense]

New boyfriend? no its absolutely not ok! She surely at 7 can wash herself. It must be uncomfortable for the little girl.

[makemineamalibuandpineapple]

No, definitely not. To me the fact that he is new is only part of the issue, the chances are he is a decent guy and nothing untoward would happen ever. However, at 7, she should be given personal boundaries and allowed privacy. I wouldn't go in with my own DS at that age. I am within shouting distance and will pop in if he's forgotten his towel but I won't stay in with him anymore. He's 9 now btw but it's been like this for at least 2 years.

[ImperialBlether]

Read the thread!

[rhondajean]

No definitely not, but I should also add I still help my 8 yo dd bath, I wash her back and neck and check behind her ears, she does arms legs body and bum, sometimes I go over her feet between toes erc and I still wash her hair. She likes this, if she started objecting I would stop, but she doesn't always get herself the cleanest (and she loves getting her back washed!). I'm not sure a 7 yo can properly clean themself on their own?

But a half - proper wash occasionally doesn't do any harm if you are washed regularly and I would never ask anyone apart from DH, her sister or her gran to help her wash.

[makemineamalibuandpineapple]

I just need to clarify, are the OP and Teen the same person??

[makemineamalibuandpineapple]

Sorry I said that wrong Does the OP mean she is the little girl in her original post?

[Asamumnonsense]

Oh sorry Teen! I did not read all the posts. Sorry about the bad feeling resurfacing! I am also so overprotective of my 5 years old and that it because it also happens to me when i was a child.. Therapy is a good way of dealing with it, it really helps. keep these sessions.

[DeepRedBetty]

Yes makemine she is.

[lotsofdogshere]

I'd be very worried about this, it is totally inappropriate on so many levels.

[expatinscotland]

I'd report this, tbh.

[gimmecakeandcandy]

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. Did other things happen? Do you still see your mother and him, do your children see them? I hope therapy helps you confront her. She let you down. Badly.

[WhateverTrevor]

Wish people would read the thread before posting.
Glad you're getting help op

[halfthesize]

OP this is so sad, I hope the therapy helps you. There really r some awful people out there

[Branleuse]

It wasnt OK op. Im sorry youve been through this and had to blank things out.

Big hugs. You are not overreacting x

[CrapBag]

Oh no thats awful Teen. I remember my dads friend (who I had known for years) accidently walked in the bathroom once when I was in the bath, I was a little older than 7 but he was absolutely horrified and left asap. Thats how any normal man would react.

Your mother let you down. Does she know how you feel or about the therapy? Is she still with him? What about the baby they had together?