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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell them to find their own way to the airport in a foreign country

770 replies

EspressoMonkey · 20/01/2013 09:30

First of all, sorry, long story and first world problem.

DH, DCs and i live abroad for DH's job. We live in a rented house close to DH's work as it is not really easy for foreigners to buy property where he works. I miss England and our lovely home there, so last year DH bought me a Ski Chalet as a birthday present / thank you for leaving your family and job in England to follow me around the world, present. He insisted it was my chalet, i could decorate it how i wanted etc, do what i wanted with it.

The chalet is in a fabulous ski resort and to me it is very much our home. We spend most weekends there, we do not rent it out as a holiday chalet.

Last year MIL asked whether HSIL and her uni flat mates could visit for a weeks snowboarding holiday. I was reluctant to agree. DH's does not really know his HSis and when she has visited us in other homes she has been very messy (straightens hair over sink leaving behind lots of hair etc etc) and she never helps out at all. Reluctantly i agreed, MIL insisted her friends were nice and they would help out and babysit DCs in exchange for free board.

HSIL and her friends booked plane tickets which meant they landed late at night with no way of getting to the chalet so DH drove a 6 hour round trip to collect them from the airport.

They have been here all week and as i guessed, have been hard work. They have done nothing to help out around the house, not bothered to help with dinner or clean away afterwards, not helped with DCs or bothed to even buy me a bunch if flowers or some chocs to say thank you for having them. We all eat together but they talk amongst themselves and make little conversation.

On Wednesday DH was called back to work with a crisis, leaving DCs, myself and HSIL and her friends. Since then they have been worse, going out at night and getting drunk and returning at 2/3am and waking DCs and i with their noise. Last night things worsened. DCs and i were woken at 3am, i could hear male voices and smelt cigarette smoke. Our house is strictly non smoking, especially as we have a baby. I went into the lounge and interrupted the party. I asked the young men to stop smoking in my home and to please leave as i didn't know who they were. The young men were local lads and were very apologetic for smoking and waking us and explained they didn't know it was a private home. As they left one of HSIL's friends, under her breath, called me a snotty cow. I turned around and politely challeneged her on her comment. She repeated it and called me an old hag too (34 BTW, she is 20).

I went back to bed fuming and in tears. This morning i woke them all up at 8.00am. They are due to fly back home tonight and i assume were expecting DH or me to take them to the airport. I explained that because DH was not here and because we had had a lot of snow lately and the minibus was snowed in, they could make their own way back to the airport via public transport. I was not driving them 6 hours round trip. They had 12 hours to get back to the airport themselves. The journey is a bus and two train rides and takes a total of 3.5 / 4 hours. An hour later i heard the door bang and went to their rooms. They have left and take all their stuff. They have not said good bye. The room where the two girls were sleeping has been trashed. Make up; lipstick, foundation and other stuff has been smeared into my beautiful new White Company bed sheets. It doesn't look like an accident as it is on all the pillows, duvet and sheet.

I phoned DH at work and told him what had happened. It was a broken line and DH was v. busy at work so i know he wasn't really aware of the whole story as it was hardto talk. But he questioned whether i had checked they had money to get to the airport and whether the trains were running. I hadn't. I have checked since and the trains are running. But have i done the right thing? AIBU?

OP posts:
Cuntitinthebin · 26/01/2021 11:47

It's annoying that it's a zombie but I still enjoyed it, so thanks for bumping.

Scbchl · 26/01/2021 12:01

If this had been posted now it would of been zapped with a "we have some suspicions taking it down while we look behind the scenes' 😂

Hoppinggreen · 26/01/2021 12:02

@LessMissAbs

I feel for your DH who not only has a selfish HSIS but has managed to surround himself with equally selfish, spoilt, entitled people in his life.

Noblesse oblige OP. Since I assume you do not work enough to afford your own ski chalet, your "job" includes being a good hostess. You went into this visit with the wrong attitude, you saw it as a nuisance, you decided you didn't like your visitors in advance, rather than using it as an opportunity to widen your social circle and perhaps do something slightly different for a short time. You honestly do come across as more of a 64 year old than a 34 year old.

None of this excuses the damage, although I doubt you had to phone your DH at work with it - can you not just deal with it calmly, it doesn't sound that horrendous, and tell him in time.

I do think the visitors sound chavvy, but theres a tiny part of me (and I'm anything but) which is almost thinking they did this to shake your world up a little bit. Yes its upsetting, but being in tears over a small party is OTT, as if is treating this mess as world-ending.

No matter how annoying your guests, you should have ensured their return visit was planned in plenty of time. Even if through gritted teeth if necessary. Your DH was very kind to do a 6 hour round trip drive to collect them on arrival when he works full-time; the least you could have done was the same.

Since you seem to be so strict in your opinions on how people should behave, perhaps update your copy of Debretts and how to deal with visitors.

I don't think you or the guests come out of this that well actually.

Pure jealousy dripping off every word
Fuckingcrustybread · 26/01/2021 12:03

I did wonder at the having a holiday in a ski resort but my eyes saw the date as January, didn't register 2013!! It was when op said they were going back to Blighty that I read the date properly.
Great entertainment on a boring Tuesday, thanks to whoever bumped this first. Big Barry and little Barry!!

WhereDoMyBluebirdsFly · 26/01/2021 12:15

Oh I remember this thread first time around. I had chalet envy then and I have it again now! Baby Barry must be in about Year 6 these days.

If you're around @EspressoMonkey please update on what all the characters are up to: did HSIL reform her wicked ways? Did MIL get a handsome 23 year old pool boy boyfriend after Big Barry? Did the ski instructors try to seduce you? Enquiring minds need to know!

ThanksItHasPockets · 26/01/2021 12:20

As zombie threads go this one is a cracker. I can’t believe it isn’t in Classics. @MNHQ?

SparkysMagicPiano · 26/01/2021 12:34

Take photos and attach them to the message/email

@ktp100

what would be the point of doing this when the original post is from 2013?

OakSnow · 26/01/2021 12:43

Totally made my day this zombie thread and didn’t notice until I thought “how are you popping to the U.K. for a weekend skirting quarantine!”

OP, if you ever come back I totally get this is your home and not a holiday home as you move around other countries.

I hope you never host anyone again and clearly big Barry thought he’d score a free holiday. I hope your HSIL has grown up, had kids and joined and read this and realised she was a spoilt little brat and apologised.

thosetalesofunexpected · 26/01/2021 13:24

@EspressoMonkey

Please make sure you take plenty of photos of all the mess and damage these ungrateful Arseholes have done to your chalet property.! 😬

I am angry at the way you have been treated like shit by these Arseholes !

Also make sure you sent a bill of all the damage these Arseholes have done to your place

And definatelly complain to their parents all of them too.
Obviously tell them its either they as parents pay for this or the Adult children As soon as possible

If they will not take you seriously threaten to take them to a small claims court to get all your money back.

Sparklingbrook · 26/01/2021 13:24

I never saw this the first time around. Grin Got to love a zombie thread.

PinotLover · 26/01/2021 13:27

another one here who dint notice the date but what a fab thread. Wonder how little Barry is getting on with homeschooling?!

Margotshypotheticaldog · 26/01/2021 13:33

I definitely think the ski instructors were trying to seduce @espressomonkey. That's why the husband was so territorial and also why they kept returning to "apologise".
Also the half sister in law's bullying chavvy mate probably sensed that she was about to lose out on her potential holiday fling with the gorgeous Czechs, and THAT'S why she puked in the pool and stole all the champagne. Bitch! 😊

Ragwort · 26/01/2021 13:33

Thought this was familiar ..... Grin wonder what happened in the end or if OP and her DSIL are speaking now!

Margotshypotheticaldog · 26/01/2021 13:34

Jesus I'm getting no work done here at all today 😂😂

MaelyssQ · 26/01/2021 13:38

I turned all Covid police when I started reading this thread - how can they go for a week's holiday abroad when we're in lockdown? What about quarantine? What about bringing another Covid variant back to the UK? Hmm

Then I saw the date and fondly recalled that in 2013, we could go on holiday without any problem!!

Thatwentbadly · 26/01/2021 13:45

@thosetalesofunexpected that might be a bit tricky as it happened 8 years ago.

TigerDrawers · 26/01/2021 13:58

I read this also without checking the date to begin with and was wondering WTF all these people are doing going skiing, going clubbing and getting drunk, etc! Was wildly jealous until I realised then I became very sad about how life has changed! And I don't even like skiing or clubbing!

I also don't know how this was ressurected but it @EspressoMonkey is still around it would be great for an update. I suspect MIL and HSIL will have been the source of much more CF'ness and bonkers behaviour since then!

PinkRosesPurpleHearts · 26/01/2021 14:02

@SparkysMagicPiano

Take photos and attach them to the message/email

@ktp100

what would be the point of doing this when the original post is from 2013?

TBH I think HSIL's behaviour was such that the OP should pop them in an e-mail and send to her MIL every year on the anniversary. :)

I would seriously LOVE an update!

hedgehogger1 · 26/01/2021 14:07

Yeah I think I'd have been telling them to find themselves the equivalent of a premier inn there and then. Cheeky Fuckers!

hedgehogger1 · 26/01/2021 14:09

Oh damn it zombie thread

ImAncient · 26/01/2021 14:23

This is brilliant. I don’t care that’s it’s a zombie thread!

byebyeboyee · 26/01/2021 14:37

Omg come back! What happened withe champers. The pool vomit? Big Barry little Barry and the old fox?

BloggersBlog · 26/01/2021 14:37

@kittycorner

You've done nothing wrong *@EspressoMonkey* and have been more than reasonable.

Never again allow them to stay, definitely give all the details to MIL and she should be making her daughter pay damages. Hard lesson but important one. Twenty years old and they behaved like toddlers having a tantrum.

Hmm
mogtheexcellent · 26/01/2021 14:43

I loved this thread in 2013. laid up in hospital/on sofa with HG.

Still fab!

saraclara · 26/01/2021 14:47

Well I for one, am glad this got accidentally bumped! What a great story, told well. Just what I needed on a grey day.