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AIBU?

To tell them to find their own way to the airport in a foreign country

770 replies

EspressoMonkey · 20/01/2013 09:30

First of all, sorry, long story and first world problem.

DH, DCs and i live abroad for DH's job. We live in a rented house close to DH's work as it is not really easy for foreigners to buy property where he works. I miss England and our lovely home there, so last year DH bought me a Ski Chalet as a birthday present / thank you for leaving your family and job in England to follow me around the world, present. He insisted it was my chalet, i could decorate it how i wanted etc, do what i wanted with it.

The chalet is in a fabulous ski resort and to me it is very much our home. We spend most weekends there, we do not rent it out as a holiday chalet.

Last year MIL asked whether HSIL and her uni flat mates could visit for a weeks snowboarding holiday. I was reluctant to agree. DH's does not really know his HSis and when she has visited us in other homes she has been very messy (straightens hair over sink leaving behind lots of hair etc etc) and she never helps out at all. Reluctantly i agreed, MIL insisted her friends were nice and they would help out and babysit DCs in exchange for free board.

HSIL and her friends booked plane tickets which meant they landed late at night with no way of getting to the chalet so DH drove a 6 hour round trip to collect them from the airport.

They have been here all week and as i guessed, have been hard work. They have done nothing to help out around the house, not bothered to help with dinner or clean away afterwards, not helped with DCs or bothed to even buy me a bunch if flowers or some chocs to say thank you for having them. We all eat together but they talk amongst themselves and make little conversation.

On Wednesday DH was called back to work with a crisis, leaving DCs, myself and HSIL and her friends. Since then they have been worse, going out at night and getting drunk and returning at 2/3am and waking DCs and i with their noise. Last night things worsened. DCs and i were woken at 3am, i could hear male voices and smelt cigarette smoke. Our house is strictly non smoking, especially as we have a baby. I went into the lounge and interrupted the party. I asked the young men to stop smoking in my home and to please leave as i didn't know who they were. The young men were local lads and were very apologetic for smoking and waking us and explained they didn't know it was a private home. As they left one of HSIL's friends, under her breath, called me a snotty cow. I turned around and politely challeneged her on her comment. She repeated it and called me an old hag too (34 BTW, she is 20).

I went back to bed fuming and in tears. This morning i woke them all up at 8.00am. They are due to fly back home tonight and i assume were expecting DH or me to take them to the airport. I explained that because DH was not here and because we had had a lot of snow lately and the minibus was snowed in, they could make their own way back to the airport via public transport. I was not driving them 6 hours round trip. They had 12 hours to get back to the airport themselves. The journey is a bus and two train rides and takes a total of 3.5 / 4 hours. An hour later i heard the door bang and went to their rooms. They have left and take all their stuff. They have not said good bye. The room where the two girls were sleeping has been trashed. Make up; lipstick, foundation and other stuff has been smeared into my beautiful new White Company bed sheets. It doesn't look like an accident as it is on all the pillows, duvet and sheet.

I phoned DH at work and told him what had happened. It was a broken line and DH was v. busy at work so i know he wasn't really aware of the whole story as it was hardto talk. But he questioned whether i had checked they had money to get to the airport and whether the trains were running. I hadn't. I have checked since and the trains are running. But have i done the right thing? AIBU?

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Bluebell99 · 20/01/2013 09:43

I would photograph the damaged sheets and send to your mil, and ask her to get some compensation from the hsil, and also tell her how awful they were. Yanbu to get them to make their own way to airport, they sound appalling.

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smugmumofboys · 20/01/2013 09:44

God I feel enraged on your behalf. How fucking dare they?

Take photos and email to MiL. They should be paying for replacement bedding not MiL imo. You did well not to turf them out at 3am after the snotty cow comment.

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Bluestocking · 20/01/2013 09:45

Definitely take pictures for future reference, and consult DH about telling his mother. This is awful and there should be some consequences for these two nasty brats - they need to start learning how to behave in public!

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Trazzletoes · 20/01/2013 09:46

Definitely take photos and make sure HSil re-imburses you. She's 20. Well old enough to know you don't trash other people's property.

YANBU. At all.

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Willabywallaby · 20/01/2013 09:46

You poor thing, agree with taking pics, and you were NBU.

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shrimponastick · 20/01/2013 09:47

YaDnbu.

Take photos before you clean up. Email them on to MIL and tell all.

Aged 20 I am certain they could get to the airport under their own steam, if not tough, they are adults.

What a horrible few days for you.

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EspressoMonkey · 20/01/2013 09:49

Chub did want to throw them out at 3am but it was minus 15 and they were v. drunk. TBH the girl who made the comment, i was a bit scared of her. And when DH was here she was flirting with him. I don't think he noticed though.

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TravelinColour · 20/01/2013 09:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TuftyFinch · 20/01/2013 09:50

YANBU! Rude, spoilt brats!

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EllenParsons · 20/01/2013 09:50

Omg! Yanbu and sorry you have had to deal with such horrible people in your home.

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crazycanuck · 20/01/2013 09:50

YANBU. Not in a million years. I agree with everyone who said to take pictures of the damage and have your DH tell your MIL what happened and what the cheeky ungrateful entitled brat said to you.

We're moving to a winter resort town later this year and I am dreading having to stave off this very scenario. OP I admire your strength in not showing them the door last night!

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Adamit · 20/01/2013 09:51

oh sweet jesus I am fuming on your behalf. YANBU! fuck them. def take pics and never have them stay again.

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flossy101 · 20/01/2013 09:55

Yanbu!

How rude of them to treat your home like that. Definitely take photos and make sure MIL and DH know how they behaved, and don't let anyone stay again!!

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whois · 20/01/2013 09:55

YANBU

Girls were nasty selfish twats. MIL can't possibly like HSIL?

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MidniteScribbler · 20/01/2013 09:55

YADNBU!!! Rude entitled little turds.

This is why no one knows that I own my holiday home, they just think that I rent the same place everytime I go away. I refuse to allow anyone to think that they have some rights to use it. It's mine, and I go there to get away from people, not to have them ruin the place I worked so hard for.

Tell your mil to get stuffed next time she calls.

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whois · 20/01/2013 09:56

Sorry, thought HSIL was MILS new man's daughter. Not the daughter of MIL and new man.

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TeWiSavesTheDay · 20/01/2013 09:56

Bloody hell! YANBU. They took the piss utterly.

Even if your MIL hadn't told passed on to them that they needed to pull their weight/watch the dcs, common sense and politeness should've at least told them that the minimum was to be quiet and respectful of your home.

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Arithmeticulous · 20/01/2013 09:58

Take lots and lots of photos. That's a real Facebook moment.

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Lavenderhoney · 20/01/2013 09:59

You have been remarkably nice to me - late nights, not helping, smoking, rude and disrespectful and damaging your property. They were very lucky not to be chucked out before. If someone called me a snotty cow and didn't take it back they woud be out in the snow about 2 minutes later ( hot headed temper)

Agree take pics, send an email and call and talk to your mil as well asap, these things are better on the phone. Ask they pay to replace. They won't but should be asked. Let mil if she wants to. She won't have to buy hdsis a Christmas/ birthday present, the money went to replace your stuff. Hah!

Just because you are wealthy and have a nice house does not give others the right to trash it.

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tasmaniandevilchaser · 20/01/2013 09:59

Good grief!! YANBU AT ALL!!!!! Foul, foul people. Agree with everyone else about letting your DH MIL know just how awful they were, inc photos and discussion about compensation for deliberate damage.

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smornintime · 20/01/2013 10:03

YADNBU!!! Rude entitled little turds.

I concur!

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MidniteScribbler · 20/01/2013 10:03

Oh, and I would have given them directions to the airport. Via a few war zones.

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AlistairSim · 20/01/2013 10:03

Horrible brats!

Yanbu, OP.

I wonder how they will spin it to MIL?

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drinkyourmilk · 20/01/2013 10:05

I can't believe people act like this! Is be so grateful for you putting us up. Id be offering a night's babysit and cooking whenever I could.
Disgraceful behavior! Take the photos and email them to your dh along with an explanation of their behaviour and what happened. Let him deal with it.
Close the door on the room today and enjoy some snuggles with your babies xxx

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EspressoMonkey · 20/01/2013 10:05

Ok have taken photos of the bedding. I have written an email to MIl and saved it as draft. I have no idea how to download the photos and attach them but at least i have them as back up. Have kept the email brief, explained they were rude and unhelpful (not as promised). I have not asked MIL for money for the sheets, am waiting for her to offer. Mmm will send it now

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