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AIBU?

AIBU to think school should give phone back?

79 replies

wondermammy · 20/01/2013 00:15

Hi all, my first post on here but really wanted peoples opinions on this. MY DD1 is 15 and in transition year in secondary school which i think is year 10 or 11 in england? anyways, last week DD's phone was taken off her in class for "texting"(don't suspect this as teacher has a vengeance against our family due to previous members being in school and she sits at the front , shes not stupid!!),the phone was sent to vice principals office and couldn't be retrieved for 24hrs and had to be collected by a parent/guardian!! As both DH and i work from 9-5 we couldn't collect phone and had to ask DU to collect it.DD had to do the journey home without a phone which involves a good 20-30 minute brisk walk followed by 10min journey on tram and she also does this alone. AIBU to think phone should have been given back at the end of the day and some kind of written punishment should have been given instead? if it had not of been for DU phone wouldn't of been collected at all!!!

Thanks all!

OP posts:
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ApocalypseThen · 20/01/2013 08:14

Does the school really have a massive vendetta against your family, or are you the family that can't stick to the same rules as everyone else and then has Mammy down to make sure there's no punishment?

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LAlady · 20/01/2013 08:26

YABU.

At my DS's school if they have a phone at anytime (they are banned totally) they are confiscated until the end of term. He has a coach journey of 8 miles there and back everyday. He's 12.

They are the rules.

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Bobyan · 20/01/2013 08:30

Well at least they didn't shout at her and then send her outside for a run or swim.

That would be abusive.

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BeanJuice · 20/01/2013 08:34

Must be a troll surely? If not YABVU

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olivo · 20/01/2013 08:37

Well, if I had my way,anyone with a phone disturbing my lesson would be sent to run 10 laps of the school field holding the blooming phone above their head Wink

Seriously though, OP, I'm sure you now know YABU. Mobiles and iPods are the bane of most teachers' life.

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LIZS · 20/01/2013 08:38

Are you 15 ?

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Nincompoopery · 20/01/2013 08:40

LAlady - wow, end of term? Just curious, does that deter the pupils? I would hope so.
In the school I work in phones are confiscated until the end of the day, this is not enough of a deterrent. The average number of phones I have confiscated until the end of the day is 4 per lesson.It's not just the texting these days though. Most pupils now have iphones, blackberrys and as such the issues now are videos, bbm, google, YouTube etc... It's a nightmare and disruptive for the teacher and the whole of the class.
YABVU- if the rules are clearly set out, then as a parent your responsibility should be to uphold these with your DD, thereby giving her a valuable lesson in how to respect her education, rules and those around her!

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FelicityWasCold · 20/01/2013 08:44

OP you'd hate me, it's a min of 24 hours here, which means on a Friday it is confiscated until Monday.

I average one every Friday Grin

I don't hate kids, I hate disruption.

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cricketballs · 20/01/2013 08:45

Nina - we have similar; first time end of the day (have to collect from office so they keep a record), 2nd time end of week and parent has to collect, 3rd time end of that half term, again parents collect

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olivo · 20/01/2013 08:52

Ours is the same as yours cricketball.

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HoobleDooble · 20/01/2013 08:56

What happens if there's a 4th time (am thinking maybe stamped on infront of the whole school at a special assembly)?

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Groovee · 20/01/2013 08:57

Do you not think you should be teaching your daughter basic manners and respect that the phone should be switched off and not being used during lessons?

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Bossybritches22 · 20/01/2013 09:02

A teacher at a local school has a large plastic tray on her desk which the pupils put their phones in for the lesson & get them back after lesson ends. Says a lot for her relationship with her class that they all comply !!

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McNewPants2013 · 20/01/2013 09:06

your DD is lucky, Because if my child was disturbing a class with her mobile phone then when she got home then she will not be allowed it then.

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GinandJag · 20/01/2013 09:08

I think this is a ver typical school policy - to have it picked up by a parent after a specified amount of time.

Perhaps your DD will learn her lesson having inconvenienced both the school and her parents.

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Flobbadobs · 20/01/2013 09:13

The HT at DS's high school explained it this way:
Phones are allowed as long as they are turned off in school time. If the phone is seen then it's confiscated until the end of the day, the pupil collects it.
If it's seen again the parent has to collect it. It's done this way to purposely inconvenience everryone to make the point to the child that they broke the rule. Hopefully the parent will be so annoyed with the child that they will back the school up wrt the phone policy.
YABU.

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bluer · 20/01/2013 09:17

Yabvu! Firstly your dd was texting...you're very gullible if you believe anything else. Secondly your daughters behaviour is impacting on her education...i'm sure you'll appreciate that it's not a one off (some pupils have the bloody things surgically stretched)...and you need to be responsible for ensuring she gets 100% education not 50% listening 50% chatting with a mate who's probably in same class.

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ThreeBeeOneGee · 20/01/2013 09:18

If my DS1 had his phone confiscated at school for texting in class, I would assume he wasn't yet mature enough in attitude to take a phone into school.

Once we got the phone back from the school, I would confiscate it myself for at least a week.

I would also support the school on principle. The rules and policies have probably been in place since your DD started there, and by sending her to the school you are agreeing to abide by them.

Do you or your children have previous 'form' in terms of not supporting the teachers' decisions? If so, then the 'vendetta' question has been answered as far as I am concerned.

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RuleBritannia · 20/01/2013 11:15

OP hasn't come back after the first YABU, has she/he? It looks as if the message has got through.

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ShipwreckedAndComatose · 20/01/2013 11:22

D'you think op will come back? Hmm

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ShipwreckedAndComatose · 20/01/2013 11:23

Ooh! Xposting!

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soverylucky · 20/01/2013 11:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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needtogetoffsofa · 20/01/2013 13:59

[grin]@HoobleDoooble

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Waitingforastartofall · 20/01/2013 15:42

I got my phone took off me in high school, if i remember rightly the conversation with my dad went something along the lines of "tough, your own bloody fault and ill get it when i get round to it" He didnt get round to it very quickly with working 6am until after tea so i was without a phone. Never again did i get it confiscated though!

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ripsishere · 20/01/2013 15:49

It's the vendetta bit that's tickling me.
My DH is a teacher. I've lost count of the number of vendettas he has and the cost of an execution nowadays. Well, he has to sell all the phones he confiscates just to cover the paid for silence from the police.
Come back Op and tell us why there is a vendetta.

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