About my newborn's name?

[MmmnoodlesoupIsDueXmasEve]

Having a hormonal morning. Finally decided on our baby's name after much deliberation yesterday and told a few friends who all said it was lovely.

My mother calls this morning and I tell her we have decided on Oliver James L.M (surname) to which she replied 'OH NO!!' Like I've told her I'm calling him Crap Bag or something this really upset me as I feel like I could never call him this now as I know she hates it.

So now DP has declared he doesn't like Oliver either and was 'going along with it for me' :( I really thought we both liked it as he has always expressed this.

Now I feel so confused, I really liked it and think it really suits him but now it's completely tainted and DP is looking up names like Ivander and Cassius . I guess I'm upset because the baby has his surname and now he's going to choose the first name when I'm the one who carried him and pushed him out and will no doubt be doing the majority of caring as I'm ebf and he's back to ft work next week,

Sorry just needed to rant, feel so upset.

[JustFabulous]

I think it is very important that you assert your authority and status as BabyNoodleSoup's mother right now otherwise your parents and brother, wtf, are going to think they have the right to make demands over how you bring up your baby. Naming a child can be such a fundemental thing so God knows what they will be like when you make feeding, clothing, schooling choices when they are like this now.

[5Foot5]

AreYouADurtBirdOrALadyBird "There is an Olivander in dc2 class in school,could that be a comprimise. "

Oh that is the best laugh I have had in days! Isn't Olivander the person who runs the wand shop in Diagon Alley?

[GregBishopsBottomBitch]

5Foot5 That is true, and now i think i love that name.

[5Foot5]

"Me and DP will carry on looking I guess. He really liked Hugo or *Dexter", which I guess I liked "

Serial killer.

Nothing wrong with Oliver at all, but you do have to agree of course. Hugo has a nice ring to it

[AmandaPayne]

Oh, poor you. Change or don't change your baby's name. But don't let your mother think she can control how you raise your own child by 'tainting' your decisions and choices with her disapproval. That way mental breakdown lies...

[assumpta]

Maybe you should tell your brother and sister that it would be such a lovely idea for your mum to be able to name their babies for them, but you will stick to naming your baby yourself. Let's see how agreeable they are with her then!

Your sister and brother should be telling her that it doesn't matter what name she does or does not like, she has had her time naming babies, now it's your turn. As for a granny not being able to pronounce it, that is utter nonsense; she will manage it somehow.

[pumpkinsweetieMasPudding]

Always go with the name you like or you will regret it!
Names are a personal choice, and yours & your dps choice only.

[PessaryPam]

Oliver is a very nice name but quite popular at the moment.

Jolyon is a nice unusual name, and abbreviated to Joly is pretty upbeat. It's a variant of Julian and means young I think.

[Veritate]

The trouble with Cassius is that it makes me think of that quote from Shakespeare - Yon Cassius has a lean and hungry look.

I must say I have always immediately said that I liked whatever name my relatives and friends told me they had chosen for their offspring, even if I didn't. I think it's totally up to them to choose and no-one else, and when they obviously like that name it's offensive to say you hate it.

Mind you, it was quite hard work to sound enthusiastic that time I was introduced to Florian,Cyprian and Angelica.

[meddie]

Oliver James is a nice name. Pick a name both you and DP love.
I was sick of my rels interfering with my naming choices so told them I had picked 'star-anise' if it was a girl and 'soccer' for a boy. They didnt say a peep when they finally heard their real names (both traditional names)

[PessaryPam]

AmberSocks my mum hates my dc4s name-Ivor-in fact it hasnt been popular at all really,her reaction was worst though,but me and dh love it and when i was pregnant i just thought of him as that,and as soon as i saw him(i caught him myself when i gave birth and lifted him up out the water) i said "hello Ivor!" so it was just meant to be,if it feels right then go with it.

I just hope your surname isn't Biggin

[MudCity]

Oliver is a great name (and believe me, I am fussy). Tell everyone to piss off.

If it is any consolation my mother would do exactly the same, whatever the name.

You have chosen that name for him after a lot of thought. It is a gift that lasts a lifetime. Don't let other people ruin it or you and for him.

People can keep their opinions to themselves.

Tell your husband how you are feeling. You old go on forever choosing a name and never get anywhere. Don't like his choices by the way.

[Grapesoda]

Oliver is a lOvely name. So is James.
If your DH wants to rev up the name a bit maybe he could insert a quirky middle name.
A name that seems cute on a baby has to last and suit a grown up man.
Refuse to talk to anyone else until you a dh have had some space and a talk (during which you get your own way)

[Tralalalaha]

I wanted Corin. OH is a miserable git and wouldn't let me have it.

[MudCity]

Sorry for typos...don't let other people ruin it for you or for him...

You could go on forever choosing a name.

You may feel sensitive about the naming thing right now because your mother has stuck her oar in. However, one day you will be able to tell young Oliver how he came to be named, you will be able to tell him how you stuck to your guns and you will both have a laugh over it.

If you agree to change his name now you will always think about how you wanted to call him Oliver but other people's opinions got in the way...

[peaceandlovebunny]

don't rush - i knew a lady who took months to decide what to name her second son. she eventually decided on registering him as william, but used liam as his everyday name.

oliver james is a lovely choice. fits in anywhere. hugo should be ok.

are you in the uk? cassius, ivander and dexter are not host culture names - does your partner want to use the name to make a 'statement' about heritage? or is he just a boxing fan?

[MudCity]

See, look at Tralalalaha's post...that is exactly what I mean.

Miserable gits getting in the way of good decisions.

[sparklechops]

Oliver James is a lovely name, OP. If you like it, keep it.

We had the same problem when DD was born, only it was MIL who was a bitch about it. DD was a day old and I was still in hospital when we told MIL the news on the phone. She immediately burst out laughing and said, 'You can't call her that!' I was distraught and threw the phone at DH, the midwife rushed in as she heard the commotion. The midwife and I actually had a good laugh about it later as she said the same thing had happened to her twenty years earlier.

In the end, we gave DD a longer version of the original name on her birth certificate. Guess MIL's reaction when we told her we were doing this? 'You can't do that!'

Unfortunately, from what I've read on here since, I think this sort of reaction is common. I reckon it's a control thing. It definitely was with my MIL, anyway. She has since said she loves DD's name, as though she's completely forgotten what a cow she was about it originally.

Be strong! Your baby, your choice.