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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think adults who can't drive are a nuisance

815 replies

Atthewelles · 27/12/2012 14:07

Barring situations where an illness or financial circumstances proscribe it aibu to think adults who can't drive are a PITA. People have to constantly go out of their way to collect/drop them off places; arrange plans around the times that suit the non-driver who can't travel solo but has to tag along with you; always be the designated driver who can't have a drink while the non driver happily slurps a third glass of wine etc etc etc

Yes, I have been spending too much time with a non driving sibling over the family Christmas but AIBU to think that a perfectly functioning adult (who is extremely technically minded) in full time paid employment, should bloody well learn to drive.

OP posts:
autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 17:41

I've gone through my list of friends and family and yes, there's one person who does not drive. And they feel totally restricted and hate it. And shell out shitloads of money on crap, unreliable public transport. Maybe I'm short sighted, but I have no idea why anyone who can afford to drive and run a car chooses not to. Driving makes life easier.

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 17:50

I think driving makes people lazier. I love not driving. I love using the train or bus. Getting taxis and walking. What's more, ds loves it and hates using cars.

autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 18:05

I always find it incredible when people say they love not driving! I had so many incidents happen to me when I didn't drive, which left me cursing my lack of driving license. Like the time I had to run in the dark and the rain, whilst pushing a buggy and feeling I'll myself, to the doctors. Being heavily pregnant and forced to walk a 60 minute journey to have a blood test (no buses and unreliable taxis). Having to take 2 buses to work on what would've been a 30 min car journey. Took 1.5 hours on public transport. Etc..

ArthurPewty · 30/12/2012 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Offred · 30/12/2012 18:23

Autumn - that really demonstrates the absolutely selfish attitude of some drivers, you aren't meant to drive when heavily pregnant and ill, you have to be fit to drive.

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 18:24

But why would you live so far from the doctors if you couldn't drive. What if the car won't start/breaks down?I can understand why people drive, I accept everyone isd different. Why can't you?

ArthurPewty · 30/12/2012 18:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 18:58

Why can't I understand? Because I was an unhappy adult non driver for many many years and finally passed my test in my early thirties. It was an utter revelation. For the first time in my life, I had real freedom. The freedom to go where I wanted exactly when I wanted to. And no Ofrred, it's not absolutely selfish for a heavily pregnant woman who doesn't feel great (bad back, braxton hicks, probably caused by too much physical activity, ie.walking) to drive in a car. It's absolutely sensible My third pregnancy was the only one in which I could drive. And bloody hell, that made life far far easier. And to suggest that people should only live within close range of doctors/shops/schools etc is ridiculous. I didn't want to be restricted in that way. Most people don't want to be restricted in that way.

autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 19:00

and without a doubt, the overwhelming majority of non drivers are forced to rely on drivers at some point, so they might as well learn how to drive since they find people who can drive both handy and useful

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:03

We all choose homes that fulfil our requirents. Travel is one of them. Why is that ridiculous? Just because you didn't like it, doesn't mean others ae the same. You are being v blinkered. Its almost like a former smoker denouncing the evils of nicotine, except the roles are reversed. Evangelical and ott.

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:04

I never have. So that's that nonargument out the window.

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:04

Apologies for spelling/grammar. Am on twatphone.

Offred · 30/12/2012 19:06

Yes it is selfish autumn because you aren't allowed to drive when ill or heavily pregnant, especially if you are having braxton hicks, it is selfish because it is dangerous. It is pathetic to behave as though a pregnant woman can't walk and has to drive because frankly if you genuinely aren't fit to walk you aren't actually fit to drive either.

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:09

I agree with offred. I have arthritis in my hands and legs. Driving wouldn't be safe because my hands and legs freeze. So I don't.

autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 19:12

Lol, Offred, what utter utter tosh you spout! I had regular Braxton Hicks when I was pregnant. Should I have hung up my car keys for 9 months?! I was perfectly fit to drive, but it was extremely bloody uncomfortable to walk. You can pretend that it's jolly good exercise and jolly good fun for a pregnant woman to walk here there and everywhere, but I found it completely grim, sorry!

autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 19:13

and it's obvious you're not a driver, because if you were, you'd realize that no pregnant woman would ever get behind a wheel if she felt that she might be danger to herself or others.

cinnamonnut · 30/12/2012 19:14

Couldn't possibly step onto one of those germ-ridden, weirdo-filled buses now, could we Xmas Wink

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:15

You may have found it grim, but I loved it. It kept me fit and healthy and helped me lose weight again quickly.

I don't think driving when having contractions is safe either.

Offred · 30/12/2012 19:15

I'm aware you clearly thought it was ok to drive.

nailak · 30/12/2012 19:16

people factor in where the schools and parks are when buying/renting, it is no different factoring in where the bus stops are! lol

I would hate to live in a place where I had to drive to the nearest shops and doctors etc and couldnt just walk down the road! I like being able to quickly pop out to nearest shop. Recently I went to a country where you couldnt walk to nearest shops and parks for 2 weeks, I absolutely hated it, I could never live like that!

and when the kids get older it their teens i would like them to beable to do their stuff without me being a taxi driver!

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:16

And autumn, not everyone makes sweeping assumptions. Some people will drive when its not safe to. Many people, in fact.

autumnlights12 · 30/12/2012 19:16

Trampy- braxton hicks are not contractions.
Offred, I don't expect you to get it. You don't drive. You don't know.

nailak · 30/12/2012 19:17

and also in London and big cities it is not that big of a deal, I live in a big city because I like the convenience of everything close by!

Offred · 30/12/2012 19:17

Why is it important to be a driver? Jeez... I would have thought it was obvious before now that I'm not a driver... Duh...

This is exactly my problem with a lot of drivers... "But it's easier.... Waaaah!" No, people absolutely should not drive when they are not fit to drive, including when they are ill or having braxton hicks... Can you not understand that things being easier for the very first pregnant woman in the world is not a reason to drive irresponsibly?

TrampyPants · 30/12/2012 19:18

Nailak, exactly. We won't move further out because its not practical. A family of 6 wouldn't move into a 2 bed house, why would a nondriver live an hour from the nearest dr/shop/school?