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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to not understand people that have days and days of christmas?

41 replies

2anddone · 27/12/2012 08:24

For the past 6 years it has been just me, dh and 2dc for Christmas day and boxing day. This is mainly because I refuse to spend the day with mil as she is toxic. My parents leave the country for 3 months every winter so are away at Christmas.
I love our Christmas day dc open presents with no rush and can stop for a bit to play with new gifts if they want. Christmas dinner is served when its ready and there is no pressure to get it perfect. Boxing day is fab just chilling, eating and playing with dc new toys. All family members get presents to us before Christmas so dc have them to open on Christmas day as they get quite a bit and I don't feel they need to open gifts every day for a week.
I read on Facebook friends that had Christmas day and then the exact same (or Christmas day 2 as they call it) on boxing day. Some are even going for a third today! Each time their dc are photoed with lots of presents that fc has left at gp house and there are comments about eating a second or third Christmas dinner.
So I am asking aibu to think that multiple Christmas days could spoil Christmas and make dc spoilt to get loads of days of presents? Surely you end up with a Christmas day you prefer out of the multiple ones and just do the others out of duty?
Sorry didn't realise how long this wss

OP posts:

SantasNaughtySack · 27/12/2012 08:26

They want to make each Christmas visit special, I don't understand why that's an issue as long as they're not forcing everyone else to do the same.

EuphemiaInExcelsis · 27/12/2012 08:28

YABU

People do Christmas in a variety of ways. Some like it that way, some tolerate it, some hate it.

hellohellohihi · 27/12/2012 08:28

We have divorced parents so often end up doing christmas x 3 not really our choice

catgirl1976geesealaying · 27/12/2012 08:29

YABU

If you can't see everyone on one day, you might do more than one Christmas and there's nothing wrong with that

I have to wait till February for my Christmas day 2 though :( But come Feb, the tree will be up, the turkey and all thr trimmings done, presents wrapped, crackers on the table etc

I can't wait

Foxy800 · 27/12/2012 08:30

We often have two as we have my family and dd's dad's both sides of which are divorced.

TheSecretSantaDNCOP · 27/12/2012 08:30

Some people have large families that they get along with and can't get round to on one day.

I don't live near my parents, but they love to see my kids open their presents so we catch up with them on boxing day or later. Same with the in laws. It doesn't lessen Xmas for the kids and their grandparents get a kick out of having a Christmas with their grandchildren.

merlottits · 27/12/2012 08:30

You like Christmas your way, other people like it their way. Some people like giving their kids one or two small presents, some people give half the toy shop.
Horses for courses.

I would like to have a 2nd Christmas on Boxing Day but have no invitations. Everyone comes to me Christmas Day (biggest house) and does their own thing Boxing Day. I'm loathe to entertain two days following as I have 3 kids and work full time all over Christmas. I love Christmas and would love to make it last longer.

ClaudiaWinklepants · 27/12/2012 08:31

Yes, yabu. Maybe other people have bigger families & wish to see them over the Christmas period? Maybe people work hard all year round & want to spend their precious time with their loved ones in their time off? Endless reasons and different circumstances result in different Christmasses for everyone. There is no right nor wrong way.

Loonytoonie · 27/12/2012 08:40

Everyone works so hard, and for those that actually get time off over this period, it's a long awaited break. Nowt wrong with wanting to stretch it out a bit so I think YAB a little U.

However, had you written that it takes 3-4 days post Christmas day to open up presents simply because the kids had so much given to them that they actually got bored opening up new stuff then I would be agreeing with you wholeheartedly.

That really makes me a little and makes me want to dole out the . Christmas to me is about giving (my DC got 8 presents this year - one of them a largish one (scooter)) but also not being completely consumed by materialsim.

On a rant now. Getting my coat

MackerelOfFact · 27/12/2012 08:48

YABU! People can do Christmas however they want! Surely it makes no real difference whether DCs get presents all in one go on December 25th, or spread out over several days? It's not how I would choose to do it, but why does that matter?! And if they like roast turkey and want it three days in a row, good for them.

I don't really understand the problem.

ChristmasIsAcumenin · 27/12/2012 08:57

There are 12 days of Christmas.

CwtchesAndCuddles · 27/12/2012 08:58

We always have a big get together at my mums on boxing day as my neice lives away with her mum but she comes to stay on boxing day every year.

This year dd was old enough to choose if she wanted to open all the gifts from my side of the family (under the tree at mums) on Christmas day or boxing day. She chose boxing day.

We had a lovely day and everyone enjoyed - don't be such a spoilsport op.

Megatron · 27/12/2012 09:02

So you think everyone should spend it the way you do because that's what you choose? We spend Christmas and Boxing Day just the four of us too but I have no issue with other people spending the festive season as they chose. Perhaps there are relatives or friends that are only available on certain days, perhaps there are divorced parents, perhaps people should be able to spend it as they please without judgement from others.

MorrisZapp · 27/12/2012 09:02

Yabu

Feelingdetached · 27/12/2012 09:09

op, our christmas is just like yours. i got a bit worked this year and it wasnt til i sat laughing last night with dh that i realised id been silly tis about food telly boozy sofa all with dh n kids. well booze after bedtime

i envy people who have large families generally but not at xmas that all sounds like a lot of hard work and the inevitable crap that comes with it all. i found skype intrusive enough thanks

.... off to eat chocolate for breakfast.

Yama · 27/12/2012 09:11

We are heading North today to see more family. Kids are really excited. Nice way to spend holidays in winter.

Couldn't eat another roast dinner though.

Gillyweed001 · 27/12/2012 09:13

We have 2 Christmas's as we spend one day with my parents, and one day with DH's parents. If my dsis, who is a nurse, is working over Xmas, we sometimes have a 3rd, so no one misses out.

Convert · 27/12/2012 09:17

My DH works Christmas Eve and all of Christmas Day so I try to make those days as special as I can for me and DCs and we have all of DHs family over for Boxing Day to give DH a Christmas Day really, then my mom hosts at her house for my extended family early in January so that's another Christmassy day.
We do this so we can see everyone and celebrate with them all. DH is back at work today, if we didn't spread Christmas out he would miss it. Just because you celebrate in a different way why is that better than the way we do it? Why does it matter to you?

Original poster

2anddone · 27/12/2012 09:20

I am not saying people shouldn't spend Christmas in that way and if I am honest I am jealous of those that can and enjoy doing so. I suppose the problem is my family would expect entire Christmas redo as in full on 3 course meal each day forced merriment etc. We font see some of our family for months on end so always feels really false when we all get together in that way. Was just looking for opinions on how people feel about doing Christmas multiple times really

OP posts:

CMOTDibbler · 27/12/2012 09:25

We do it twice - PIL like to have their three sons plus families round on boxing day. No one sends presents to ds ahead of time, so he gets presents from us on christmas day, presents from dhs family boxing day (4 presents in total). Not exactly excessive tbh

MissPricklePants · 27/12/2012 09:29

Well it is a mini Christmas here today as on Christmas Day dd had to see ex then we went straight to my parents afterwards. Yesterday involved building up some of dd's presents and sorting recycling and playing so today we are having a nice roast dinner and she has yet to open her stocking pressies (not because she got too many, because I have saved them for her) and a full day of me and her having quality time.

HollyBerryBush · 27/12/2012 09:30

I miss my incredibly large family because (a) they are all dead (b) those left alive are overseas.

Our Christmases used to go on, by some standards, but when you are trying to get round all the aunts and cousins, it can take a while. We weren't greedy and have roast after roast though.

fairylightsandtinsel · 27/12/2012 09:30

We only have one Christmas day and Christmas dinner, but presents are spread over several days as we have three sets of GP, all of whom are seen on different days plus the kids (who are only 3 and 1) get overwhelmed and don't play with the gifts if they get them one at a time. We spread out present opening throughout the various days also, rather than having them all in one session. Also, Xmas is nice, why not spread it out?

cozietoesie · 27/12/2012 09:30

I've got the extended family over again today - the kids are off school and at a loose end plus they like to have the extended fun. No way would I be doing another dinner though. They'll get yummy snacks and drinks and lazing around/playing games. To be honest, they're so stuffed full over the past few days that that's probably going to enough for them!

slartybartfast · 27/12/2012 09:30

do you ever see your mil? doesnt your dh want to see his mother,?

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