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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be pissed off at school for telling DD (5) about Baby Jesus?

455 replies

Kalemu · 19/12/2012 10:19

We don't want religion anywhere near our house, one of the main reasons we chose to send our DD to state school instead of a CoFE school. Imagine my surprise when she came home with a Baby Jesus picture book and singing about the Baby King. This makes me very mad - it's not like we want to keep her in a bubble, but I wanted to have told her the different religion when she was a bit older.

Thinking of writing to the headteacher to let him know our thoughts, and to demand that we're informed next time they plan to talk about religious stuff in class. Do you think AIBU?

OP posts:
Witchety · 19/12/2012 10:20

So you don't do christmas then?

twooter · 19/12/2012 10:22

Yes, have you thought about HE, so you can have total control?

DamnBamboo · 19/12/2012 10:23

Just tell her it's what some people believe!
That's what I say to my boys.
We are atheists and they are exposed to it, you won't get away from that, but you can provide balance.

Of course you can do christmas witchety and not believe in Jesus Hmm
What do you think the original celebrations at this time of year were for? Sod all to do with the birth of Jesus.

We do a fab 'christmas' every year and it is totally secular, gift-giving, feasting, spending time with friends, panto etc...

Original poster
Kalemu · 19/12/2012 10:23

No, we don't do Christmas. Our home is religion-free.

OP posts:
FoxtrotFoxtrotSierra · 19/12/2012 10:23

I thought all schools covered such things and it was common knowledge that they did. Really it was your look out to let school know before this point that you wanted your child to be removed from any classes. It's hardly breaking news - Primary school teaches about Christmas in December shocker!

I think you're unreasonable to demand you're informed of such things. Asking would be sufficient.

Salmotrutta · 19/12/2012 10:24

Yes. YABU

She will learn all about the other religions too.

She may come home with stuff about Hannukah (sp?) tomorrow.

And other parents would no doubt complain if there was no Christmas story stuff.

Best not to "demand" things either - unless you want o be "that parent" in the staffroom anecdotes.

pinkyredrose · 19/12/2012 10:24

Um . . there's this thing happening in a few days called Christmas. Maybe that's why they mentioned Jesus?

MsVestibule · 19/12/2012 10:24

Whether you like it or not (and you obviously don't!) we do live in a Christian country. We are about to celebrate one of the biggest festivals in the Christian calendar, so it's hardly surprising the meaning behind it has been discussed.

By all means, write to the HT. Or you could just say to your DD, "well, that's a nice story".

EllieArroway · 19/12/2012 10:24

It depends.

Was it presented as "Some people believe......"? Or "This is Jesus. He really existed & Christmas is when we all celebrate his birthday"?

First - YABU
Second - YANBU.

DamnBamboo · 19/12/2012 10:24

And yes, forgot to say YABU

LauriesFairyonthetreeeatsCake · 19/12/2012 10:24

They are talking about it because it is topical - at Eid and Chinese New year (and many other festivals) they will do the same. This is Religious Education - not being religious but being educated about religions around them.

All schools have to do an act of worship together (like an assembly) - this is a separate thing.

I totally agree as a Christian that practising religion in schools is not appropriate (I believe in church and state being separate).

However, education about religion, philosophy, culture etc is just the same as education about maths.

KellyEllyChristmasBelly · 19/12/2012 10:25

So you don't want her to learn about any religion then? They aren't trying to indoctrinate her they're just telling the story of Christmas!

HaudYerWheeshtFannyBaws · 19/12/2012 10:25

YABU and ridiculous

squeakytoy · 19/12/2012 10:25

Being aware of a religion and following it are two different things you know.

DamnBamboo · 19/12/2012 10:26

yes, the biggest festival in the Christian calendar which was deliberately set to coincide with the already massive pagan celebrations that had been going on for centuries.

Christ was even born at Christmas time.

Don't start tell non-christians they can't celebrate at this time of the year, because they bloody well can and it's got sod all to do with god or anything else religious.

TheCraicDealer · 19/12/2012 10:26

Don't schools have a legal obligation to include some sort of religious worship?

YABU- it's Christmas, I'd be concerned if they weren't explaining why we celebrate at this time of year tbh. All you need to do is add the caveat, "Yes DD, that's what some people believe".

MsVestibule · 19/12/2012 10:27

Your DD doesn't get any Christmas presents Shock?

WorraLorraTurkey · 19/12/2012 10:27

Hahahahaha!! Grin

Wait...you're not serious are you OP?

BerryChristmas · 19/12/2012 10:28

I'd get her out of school NOW. Home educate. How very dare they talk about Christmas.........soon they'll be talking about Easter. The nerve!!

Original poster
Kalemu · 19/12/2012 10:28

EllieArroway I think it might have been more the second than the first, but I can't say because I wasn't there obviously. Maybe I should have a chat with their teachers to see they're approach. But my initial reaction was like WTF!!! I told her that that was a story, and that some people believed it but that mummy and daddy didn't.

OP posts:
gordyslovesheep · 19/12/2012 10:28

YABU - your child has a right to make their own minds up - you may not believe but you can't impose your beliefs by banning information being given to your child - you sound like Stalin!

I am not religious but I have no issue with my children being exposed to the ideas and beliefs of religions - they have a right to information and free choice regarding their spiritual views - I don't own their minds

Witchety · 19/12/2012 10:28

damn. Bit impossible to 'do' Christmas but not mention anything religious!! As op is finding out.... School have already Oh, and Hmm right back at ya!!

Ridiculous!

Lovecat · 19/12/2012 10:29

In any school they will 'do' religion - I think (but am not sure as we go private) that state schools in England have to be 'mainly Christian' in character of their assemblies etc. Personally I don't agree with that and do think it's unfair to those of no belief/differing beliefs, but going to the Head about this may be fruitless. I'm also not sure that isolating your DD from lessons/assemblies (which may be the only way they can prevent her from learning about religion) will be of benefit to her.

Most schools also teach about ALL religions - DD goes to a Catholic school and they learn about Diwali, Ramadan/Eid, Hannukah etc. A lot of the children there are Hindu or Muslim and I'm quite sure that their parents wouldn't have sent them there if they thought that their own religious views were going to be challenged - they teach their own faith at home/Temple/Mosque so are secure in that.

Explain to your DD that this is what Christians believe, and that's why Christmas is celebrated (you could go down the route of Saturnalia/Winter Solstice celebrations stolen by Christianity to explain why people who don't believe in God still celebrate at this time of year), but it's not what you believe. At 5 I think they're old enough to take this in.

nannyof3 · 19/12/2012 10:30

Religion is everywhere! U cant hide from it, if shes at school then old enough to understand different people celebrate different religions

TravelinColour · 19/12/2012 10:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.