to spend much less on one of my dcs than the others at Christmas?

[handsandknees]

3 dcs - DD1(11), DS(almost 10) and DD2(7). I want to be fair. I try to be fair.

DD1 has asked for inline skates for Christmas. I've also bought her Trivial Pursuit which I know she wants but isn't expecting and few bits and pieces - books, backpack, t-shirt. DD2 has asked for a Design-a-Friend doll so she's getting that plus extra outfit for the doll and I've also bought her a doll's seat for her bike, and some bits and pieces. The extras are basically things they need which they would get anyway but I know they will like them. I've probably spent about £80-£100 each on them including stocking chocs etc.

DS has asked for a box of craft things, which will be only his and which he won't have to share with his sisters. He has specified paper, tape, string, stapler - that kind of stuff. I've bought a box and filled it up - I spent less than £15. I also bought him 3 books and some chocs but have only spent about £30 in total. He isnt that into books but I've tried to pick ones I think he will like. He loves chocolate/sweets so will be happy with those. He's never been interested in toys - he prefers to make things and I know if I buy more toys for him he will ignore them. He isn't interested in clothes either and doesn't need a new backpack.

The dcs have the same number of presents to open. Is this ok? Do dcs notice the value of gifts at this age or just the number?

Blackcurrants - I agree. was going to say that I'd happily let my 5 year old use the guillotine too I just think train them to use everything sensibly and to be aware!

OP - my son would love love love llove a box like you are gtting your son but agree with others you could put loads more in it - I would struggle to only spend £15 on crafty bits - and also 2 of a lot of things would be useful for him, blutack/ Wilkinsons are also good for DIY bits - plugs, work tape, not just sticky tape you could have a field day! My DS stands there muttering "how very interesting and useful" when he is in the diy section and he is 5

Big bang fair is free, we went 2 years ago see here www.thebigbangfair.co.uk/viewitem.cfm?cit_id=385247. Lots of activities to book as well www.thebigbangfair.co.uk/the_showfloor.cfm

I haven't read through the whole thing, so sorry if I repeat people, but I think if they have about the same number of parcels and even better have got what they want, why worry? If it worries you, why not just get some vouchers or something so he can top up his supplies as they run out? My mum takes spending exactly the same to the extreme and it is ridiculous.

Thefowlandthepussycat you are describing my son! His teacher is constantly trying to get him to read more fiction but he just doesn't enjoy it. He is now only allowed one non fiction book from the school library and has to take a fiction one too - he is not happy about this new rule! I wouldn't say DS's stubbornness is quiet and gentle though!

Not much interest in computers so far, aside from looking up silly songs on youtube.

Thanks so much for all the ideas - I am off to the DIY shop asap....

And I'm going to need a second box at thie rats (along with desk, lamp and di
splay shelf....)

oh good grief, what happened there?

at this rate

display shelf!

I'm guilty of not reading the whole thread but what about a rolobox or makedo kit?

its the fairness thing. You need to spend the same amount. my DP used to get my DB more than me as she was the youngest and it rankled, i thought they loved her more etc spoiled her etc therefore cared more.

I think DH has learnt to tone down the stubbornness as an adult! Our DD hasn't got there yet.

What DH would say about computers (I think) is that modern computers are a bit boring because they give you everything on a plate & you don't have to work out how to make them do stuff. Some sort of very pared-down thing like the Lego thing that Pilgit mentioned might spark his interest. I dunno, it's all Greek to me - I didn't play with toys either because I was only interested in books!

If he likes crafty stuff can't you get him something he can build? Geomags or Lego or any kind of construction type stuff. There are lots of balsa wooden sets which make great pieces for quite cheap.
He is old enough to know that you've spend less on him and he will notice.

Pottery classes maybe?

I don't think you have to spend exactly the same amount but to spend 30% of what you've spent on your daughters would feel very unfair to me, both as a parent and as one of three children (and my parents made big efforts to always be fair and even handed). My DH is one of four and the siblings were treated very differenty - he still carries resentment about it years later.
I'd get him some vouchers so he can top up his box himself later and a promise of a day out somewhere sciencey/inventorish would be awesome.

Lego/kits etc all good but the more basic the better - junk all the way....

Well op I will go against the grain, you know your ds well enough, so if you know he would be happy with the things you bought him don't worry. I would prefer my child be thrilled with craft things he wanted than not so thrilled with something more expensive that he will just toss aside.

My dh is like that, would be app with a 4.99 DVD for christmas of a film he really likes, I on the other hand like more extravagant gifts p. abey he just lik my dh

You could treat him and a friend to cinema and pizza hut if he likes, or Hobbycraft gift card

A couple of years ago I got my DD this drill
She loves it - makes mobiles from her shell collections, conkers etc.

We don't worry about the cost difference but we do keep a little tally sheet so we can make sure they have roughly the same amount to open and a roughly equal number of their wishes and interests met.

I think it's fine that his main pressie doesn't match the others in cost as it's what he wanted. But you say you've bought him a few books which he isn't that into, and not much else. I would buy a few more things to even that up. I have a horror of getting two thirds of the way through present-opening and one child having nothing left to open while the other child has still got a pile.

Things my creative and strange quirky 10yo boy would love:

A stationary pack - A3 portfolio for storing designs/drawings
plastic wallets
coloured card folders
graph paper
box files
notebooks
nice pens
highlighters
Tippex
Scissors
Hole punch and stapler

Strongbox with combination lock and stickers to decorate it with

Special shelf to go up in his room for his extra-special inventions to go on

Album to store photos of his best creations to go in

Book of blank postcards and stamps for him to send to friends/relatives with news and drawings of his creations

White lab coat with his name on it, for him to wear when he is inventing things

Sign for his bedroom door with something like "No entry - inventing in progress" or somesuch, I would make this myself, laminate it and put a picture hook in the pressie for him to help put it up

pigletmania I think he will be happy anyway but I'm going to top him up slightly after reading this. But you're right it's definitely not worth buying an expensive present. I am also happy with not very much which is just as well because I've just seen the order confirmation for an expensive camera DH seems to have bought as my present to him!

greensleeves DS has a "Danger" sign (with skull and cross bones) on his door! I always make sure they have the same number of presents however DS will rip his open in 2 minutes while DD1 takes her time and examines everything, so you can't win really.

Ah, see we make each child sit in a space on the floor while we hand out the presents one at a time, so we make sure one doesn't race through them all first

Any of my other ideas any use? Can you give us an idea of the sort of things he likes to create?

this is a fab thread, I adoooore this child

I like the swiss army knife idea especially ! and the drawing board and the bits of wood, so many amazing suggestions, we obviously all want to borrow your child !

handsandknees, I bought a drill for mine at about twelve I think? He's lost interest now but it was good at the time. A cheap drill and always under supervision (goggles etc)

I might :/ have forgotten age appropriateness though - anyway you know your son

the other good thing about the drill is it was terribly grown up - I mean - WOW factor was huge

are you ready for a chemistry set, obviously he won't want to follow the experiment instructions so I guess you'd have to be VERY ready!

if you give him loads and loads of bits and pieces you can say - we obviously need somewhere to store it so you have to build some kind of storage thing - desk tidy - you know the sort of thing? It could make a good project

greensleeves that is absolutely what I would do but DH has silly ideas about letting DS do things his way. Pah!

I liked your ideas of a shelf and photo album. It's difficult to give names to most of the things he creates, to be honest.

brycie I adore him too. Most days. There would be some days you could definitely borrow him though if you want....(might need another thread)

I had an inventor for a short while. One whole summer we had cobwebs of strings running from his attic bedroom window down the the garden, round some trees and over to next door's son's stilt house. To this day I don't know what they were for. I miss it

Chemistry set....hmm, maybe...we've had some enthusiasm for cooking which I guess is similar but no recipes, of course. He wrote his own, I think one was called "grumpy swamp". They always seem to involve chocolate, and there was no way he was listening to my advice about flour tasting better if it's cooked.

What about a camera so he can photograph his images, along with frames/ photo album also a glue gun? Origami papers, fine liners, laminator, etc. I don't think they have to have exactly the same, but so far it seems too different from his siblings' presents.