to be concerned over DS' dads partner ? - Witchcraft

[Katie08]

H and I divorced 5 years ago, amicable split and he had our DS 50:50 split with me.

He works full time and his mum will collect DS on a Monday from school however he has now informed me that his new gf will be collecting DS. He has met her online and she's been staying with them for about 2 week now but has pretty much moved in full time. My DS has come back twice this week now saying "He'll cast a spell on people he doesn't like"

I thought nothing more off it until he asked me this afternoon for a set of robes. I asked a few more questions about why he wants this and was told XW has said I need some if I am join in with her ceremonies.

I'm a active member of the Methodist church and DS is christened, we attend each week. H used to attend but his faith is his business.

I've spoken to him this afternoon to find out what's been going on, he's told me his New gf is a witch, is an active member and he's interested in it a bit now as well. When I asked what DS has been involved in he said he thinks his gf ha probably done a few ceremonies and spells with him and what's the harm ?

Am I being unreasonable to ask that DS is NOT to be involved in this ? It makes me really uncomfortable. DS is 8 and very impressionable.

Can you ring and speak to the woman directly??

The thing that made me was when the OP's son said that his dad: "He'll cast a spell on people he doesn't like" Wiccan, pagan, Hindu, Christian etc is irrespective. But saying the above to an 8 year old is not on.

OP, if I were you I'd go round to speak to your ex or his girlfriend in person.

YANBU.

that's not acceptable.

mama?

She needs to be put firmly in her place.

Just noticed OP about the "mama" thing.

I'd go round raging if I were you. Not good!

Really? A woman he's known for less than two weeks is asking your 8 year old child to call him 'Mama' and you didn't think that was worth putting in the OP?

I personally wouldn't want my child joining in with something like that and you also say you feel uncomfortable with it. I think you should trust your instincts. He's your son and you must say if you don't want him to be involved. It seems strange to me that he's only just met her and she's forcing something like that on him. Your ex partner and her ought to be asking your permission and making sure you're okay with anything like that before any mention is made to your impressionable ds. I would not allow this, because of my own religious beliefs. But how I choose to" indoctrinate" my own children is copletely my wn business, I don't go round telling other people' children to join in and they need robes. What if her beliefs involve child sacrifice? Sorry - had to put that out there!

Mama? Nice bit of drip feeding there

But dingdong - as someone who is very accepting of Wicca and paganism and have joined in some pagan festivals - I suppose that if the gf was Jewish as one of your examples it would be fine until she started doing Jewish prayers with an 8 year old who she had met 2 weeks ago knowing that the child's mother was a practising Christian.

If it was the dc father then that would be different if he had explored and decided to follow that faith - in this case however the father has not yet adopted the pagan faith but is just interested so it seems strange that he is letting his gf of 2 weeks do ceremonies with the dc when he is not around (as he thinks she did ceremonies but is not sure).

I may get a bit of stick about the child sacrifice thing but you don't know anything about her and it seems a bit much as well for your son to call her "Mama".

" But how I choose to" indoctrinate" my own children is copletely my wn business,"

are you forgetting that the child doesn't just have 1 parent? he has two and if it is ok for one to indoctirnate him (your word) then it's ok for the other to indoctrinate him in something different.

and child sacrifice?

I think the wiccans/pagans on this thread are letting their defensiveness get in the way of any common sense with their knee jerk yabus.

Of course yanbu! Your child is coming home asking for robes and talking about spells to join in with unknown rituals and who knows what, with someone you don't know and who appeared 5 minutes ago. It makes no difference at all what type of ritual it is, it would be equally as bad if it was a kippah he wanted and reciting the torah, or a cassock and surplice and talking about psalms.

It's just not on, for so many different reasons.

Gotta to laugh.

She has known your do 2 weeks and wants your son to call her mama and the paganism is what's bothering you?

The shortest day ceremony wouldn't bother me.

There are better responses than I can give about, about witchcraft etc. The fact that she's a witch, or however she chooses to be called (sorry, I am not up on the terminology) would not bother me in the slightest.

I would, however, want to know what it is my son would be up to. And I would be more than a bit that she's been there two weeks and already including him in her religious services to the point where he needs to purchase accoutrements. I'd say the same if she were another religion.

designegirl well child sacrifice is illegal, so obviously that would be wrong. I personally think that the practice of circumcision of Jewish baby boys is abhorrent and whilst clearly it's not the same as child sacrifice, i think it's a good reminder that people do do odd and unfavorable things in the name of religion.

Ps op I think you need a meeting with ex and poss another meeting with ex and gf.

If I were you I think I'd try and make other arrangements for your ds to be picked up until you know this woman better and trust her, especially as you feel uncomfortable. And if I didn't want him joining in with ceremonies and learnig spells I would say to ex partner you don't want him to join in at the moment.

and... "mama" Two weeks!

misscellania i think you've hit the nail right on the head there. And that is exactly why it's wrong to indoctrinate children into any religion, wether its done by their parents or total strangers. Children are impressionable and they have their own opinions.
OP, i really think you should be changing the title of your post, it's unclear wether you want responses to do with religion or the fact that a woman your child's just met is wanting him to call her mama.

Oh dear, everybody's brain seems to have fallen out.

If it is the case that not all witches/wiccans/pagans/whatever are crazy bonkers evil people, then it must also be the case that not all of them are kindly benevolent wise people either. What if they are - gasp - a cross-section of people?

I would object to any religious indoctrination on any child of mine by someone I'd never met and didn't have a trust relationship with, no matter what form it took, and whether or not I had any evidence that the person was otherwise objectionable. Which it sounds like she is anyway.

None of this sounds right.

And I'm a pagan with many friends in The Craft.

However, I'd be less bothered about robes (you'd not ask a non-Wiccan/pagan to provide any such thing) and more that this woman seems to be a completely unknown quantity who nobody has had a chance to get to know better.

(Or just what MissCellania said.)

Nice drip feeding