To not want my DC to participate in nativity?

[Spru]

I asked school to excuse DC from nativity (due to religious reasons - we do not depict jesus/mary/joseph.) They were absolutely fine with it. Happened to mention this to work colleagues - and they basically told me that I wasn't willing to integrate!

I was a bit shocked that they saw it like this despite the fact that I explained why. I didn't realise that this decision was perceived as a lack of willingness to integrate - in a country which I have been born and brought up in.

I had to bite my tongue for the sake of peace!

So...MN jury... AIBU to exclude DC from nativity for religious reasons (note: DC is not excluded from other christmas activities at school). Am I just not integrating well into the society that I was born and brought up in?

TIA

(please be gentle)

AFAIK it's the faces/physical representations, not the people or beliefs themselves (although probably you're just being contrary).

Oh, I see. Would have helped if that was explained in the OP. in that case then her children should not take part.

I wish you would read other people's posts properly, Blackberry instead of filtering them through your prejudice. crescent was saying that she sees the very respected and honoured people in HER OWN FAITH as blank smooth spaces. She doesn't censor out your beliefs. Muslims often choose not to depict any living thing at all through respect. Nothing to do with substituting other people's beliefs and customs.

It was in the OP... due to religious reasons - we do not depict jesus/mary/joseph

Wow, are you trying hard to be this obtuse or are you actually just thick, Blackberry? Depiction of the prophets is blasphemous. And so they are not depicted. It's not a question of substitution but that the high status of those figures means no person should interpret their bodily form. It's a mark of absolute respect.

And thank you, thebody and mrsjay - I know that I am very lucky to have such brilliant friends.

Yes, just re-read it. Anyway, I agree with the OP.

Thank you MrsTerryPratchett and the many many others who continuously have to keep clarifying my OP.

Did you know that a nativity play would cause 16 pages of debate Spru?

I am tempted to play MN bingo with it... have we had, "it's political correctness gone mad" yet?

I think we did, with the 'Winterval' discussion.

BINGO!

Thanks Wallinson.

Heee.

Wallison, so glad you have good mates.

My aunty recently died, she lived in Handsworth for 60 years a white Christian.

As the hurse drew up all of her neighbours white, Asian, black stood outside and bowed heads. It moved us to tears and was absolutely lovely.

True friends.

In DD1's nursery nativity a muslim boy was Joseph. I chatted to his mum about how they handle all the Christmas stuff at school and she said she lets them get on with whatever they want to be involved with at school, but at home obviously there is no celebration of Christmas. Personally I think it's up to the individual, but I'd rather my kids didn't miss out- I'm an agnostic, so I let them get on with all the brainwashing at school (a state, allegedly non-denominational school) and counteract it at home with "some people believe that" and so on.

I'd rather school was secular (although I don't mind religious themed plays and Re, it's more religious assemblies that bother me) but while it isn't I'll just deal with it in my own way.

That's OK crescent I hope I got it vaguely right . Night night.

Wallinson and thebody your posts are great. In shock news, people of all faiths and none can be lovely. You shouldn't have to point that out but thanks anyway for doing so.

I didn't actually realise (until yesterday) that people can get upset if parents and DC do not want to be involved in nativity for clear religious reasons.

I also didnt know that by default I should also stop acknowledging the festive season and therefore stop wishing people Merry Christmas too! I was made aware that due to the nature of my crime, I had no right to pick and choose.

Best of all, I didnt realise that there really are some people out there who equate my decision with showing a lack of willingness to integrate.

Truly baffling

Maybe I will get badges made...

I do want a Merry Christmas from everyone

I only want a Merry Christmas from Christians

I don't want Merry Christmas from anyone

Would that make it simpler?

On a serious note, a lot of the posters on this thread have made me feel great about the human race. We can all rub along, doing the bits we want, not doing the bits we don't. We can respect other people while respecting ourselves. It is possible. Do what you want, don't expect others to do what you want. Seems simple to me.

Exactly!! Makes me want to happily 'integrated-ly' sing......

I did it myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!#

Indeed MrsTerryPratchet

Right, I'm going to run away from the thread while everyone is being nice .

Why not leave it to DC. I have only known Jehovah's Witnesses stop their DCs taking part and then they haven't a clue why, other than 'mummy wouldn't like it'.

YABU.

I'm an atheist. Ds1 has his first nativity play in 2 weeks time in which he will be a king. He is so excited. I am so proud of him when he comes home saying his lines and singing the songs they are learning at school. He doesn't give two shiny shits about the biblical significance of the story - in fact, he doesn't even know what the bible is. What he cares about is doing something of significance and fun with his mates, in front of a bunch of grinning, proud parents/carers.

If he ever abstains from something like this in the future, it will be because HE wants to, not because I've told him to.

No religion or system of beliefs should ever put their ridiculous doctrines in front of the happiness and growth of kids. Do you want your child to grow up tolerant, balanced and rounded? If so, let him take part. He, nor you, are not going to get struck by a bolt of lightening. Seriously.

Right, so MrTumblesCrackWhore , imagine this.

Your children are asked to participate in a play on a theme that you believe is morally incorrect eg "stealing is great" or "go out and murder people", would you still be so happy for them to take part?

To say "oh you won't be struck down" is just offensive and insensitive.