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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wish that baby activities weren't all scheduled around nap time?

30 replies

beyoglu · 04/12/2012 14:11

I have 6 month old twins who (for now, touch wood) are good sleepers and good nappers - when they were 4 months I took the advice of Dr Weissbluth, SWMNBN and numerous other baby sleep gurus and started putting them down for naps in their cot at 9 and 1 (actually 12.30 - on a good day they make it to about 12.45) and they have a catnap at about 4. All well and good but all but one of the local children's centres has baby activities on at 1 till 3. AIBU to think that they might be more useful if they weren't on during prime baby nap time?

OP posts:
bradyismyfavouritewiseman · 04/12/2012 14:13

Because its naptime for yours doesn't mean ots nap time for everyone.

AnnieMated · 04/12/2012 14:16

Not all babies sleep at the same time you know. Both mine slept 10-12 every day at 6mo then were awake (perhaps a nod in the car later) until 6.30pm. What is 'prime' baby nap time (!) for yours, isn't for every other baby in the land - despite what all those so-called gurus you mention might have us believe! On the days there's something on you fancy taking them to, have them miss their first nap and start the second one a bit earlier. Ta-da! Routine doesn't HAVE to mean rigid...

CailinDana · 04/12/2012 14:16

There's no such thing as "prime baby nap time." If the times your babies nap isn't convenient then you could try to change it (not easy I know) or you could just bring them in the buggy and let them sleep at the activity while you have a chat. Over time their naps will change and you'll find it easier to bring them out. For the time being you just have to make the best of it.

KenLeeeeeee · 04/12/2012 14:16

Who the buggery is Dr Weissbluth?

YABU. Babies nap when they nap, and there's no set time for the vast majority of babies to do so.

LoopsInHoops · 04/12/2012 14:16

Every time is nap time for someone Confused

CajaDeLaMemoria · 04/12/2012 14:16

It happens to be the most convenient time of the day, although it can be naptime.

Nothing can be scheduled for 3pm/4pm because of school pick-up, nothing around 5pm because of bad work traffic, 6/7pm are usually classed as tea-time...some children's centres have 8pm classes but this isn't often.

redskyatnight · 04/12/2012 14:17

Obviously for people who don't have babies that nap for 3 hours in the day (not that I'm jealous or anything ...)

Floggingmolly · 04/12/2012 14:20

They wouldn't schedule the activities at these times if nobody used them, so they are evidently useful to a lot of other people. If they don't fit in with your regimented nap times, it's hardly SureStart's fault. Their aim is to reach the majority.

Chigertick · 04/12/2012 14:21

I empathize with you - having twins the routine can be so crucial! But you can do it differently if you want to and nothing bad will happenSmile
Well you may have 2 tired babies but dr whoever won't find out and you may actually get the chance to enjoy yourself! Good luck OP it is hard with 2 trying to get them to sleep at all let alone at the same time.

JenaiMathis · 04/12/2012 14:23

That's the problem with strict regimes I'm afraid. Caused no end of issues when we'd go on holiday with family (who are still a bit like that even thoguh their PFB is 10yo - he can't possibly wait for lunch Hmm )

And yes as has been mentioned already, it's always naptime for someone.

YABU.

Original poster
beyoglu · 04/12/2012 14:24

Thanks chigertick! Having had two overtired babies from about 6 weeks till 3 months I would do literally anything to get good naps out of them... realise it's not so crucial for everyone else!

OP posts:
choceyes · 04/12/2012 14:27

At 6 months old, both my DCs had sleeps from about 10am-11am and then from about 3-4pm, so I would have been able to go to that activity and have the DCs sleeping after the activity....perfect timing. But once they go from 2 naps to 1 nap, happens around 12 months, then 1-3pm is prime nap time for most toddlers.

Chigertick · 04/12/2012 14:30

I do really feel for you - I know my friends with singletons were a bit funny over our nap times (and still are sometimes) but when you're on your own all day with 2 over tired babies it can be hell!
I am lucky that mine still do have a 1-2 hr nap every day and I need that time just to catch myself up Smile
Around 6 months was when we started a few activities but we mainly did play dates that we could fit round our schedule more easily.

Original poster
beyoglu · 04/12/2012 14:35

Ah you have twins too chigertick? Got it.

Yeah, two tired babies, there's only so long you can sing to the one in the bouncy chair while cuddling the other! In a way it was easier when they were teeny because I'd just put them in the twin carrier and walk up and down with them till they fell asleep. Then they got slightly too big for the twin carrier and would yell if I tried to sit down. At that point I started reading every baby sleep book I could get my hands on... god I was really fit though!

I'm thinking that when they drop the afternoon nap we might get out a bit more... at least to soft play and stuff like that. Swimming is out of course unless DH is around... we missed out on baby massage and all that sort of stuff... OTOH they sometimes just laugh at each other laughing now. That makes up for a lot :)

OP posts:
DragonMamma · 04/12/2012 14:36

I hear you.

At 6mo both mine did 2 x 2hrs and a 45 mins catnap and we always missed everything. Even when DS was 12 months old he was still on 2 x 1.5hr naps and we missed everything then so I was very pleased when at 18mo he went to 1 nap (12-2.30) but then they bloody moved the class time from morning to lunch time.

I am a bit of a stickler when it comes to naps though - mine get seriously overtired and aren't the kind that will drop off in a highchair or that can be transferred from car to cot. A gnats fart would wake DS.

Chigertick · 04/12/2012 14:40

Yes another twin mum !!!
Once mine started napping 9/9.30 -10.30 ish we went to some baby singing groups as they were just right for after nap/ before next bottle/ sleep /lunch time!
We've always been pretty lucky with ours for sleep - only when they're ill do they fight naps/bed time (which is all the bloody time it feels at the moment!) Smile

Original poster
beyoglu · 04/12/2012 14:42

Ah cheers dragonmamma. Yeah, my two now hardly sleep unless they're in their cots, in the dark, with white noise on. If I had to choose one place they would nap that would be it though so I suppose I can't complain!

OP posts:
KittyMcAllister · 04/12/2012 14:54

I totally agree with you OP, YANBU! I have 2 two years apart, my little one still has a morning & afternoon nap and DS (age 3) used to nap also after lunch as well until recently. Even now he "flops" in the afternoon so it's not good to schedule any activites then. I do find it strange when my friends arrange things for the afternoon as I think most kids are tired then! I am a stickler for routine, it makes life so much easier and makes for well-rested kids, but I'm beginning to think I am quite unusual.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 04/12/2012 14:56

YABU

Not everyone has their baby doing things according to a book you know...

Mrsjay · 04/12/2012 14:58

This reply has been deleted

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VisualiseAHorse · 04/12/2012 14:59

I feel your pain - the only baby group near me is at 9.30. Naptime for my LO!

Mrsjay · 04/12/2012 14:59

and your babies are sleeping 4 hours during the morning be a devil and split them up into 2 hourlys

Clayhead · 04/12/2012 15:00

WTF are naps? [still bitter 11 years later...]

FestiveDigestive · 04/12/2012 15:09

Afternoon is also nap time here. My DD is almost two though so she just has one nap from 12-2/3. I am always surprised by mid-day groups too as most of the people I know have nap time after lunch. Although looking at this thread, it obviously isn't as common as I thought.

In about 6 months time, yours might be ready to cut out the morning sleep and then you will be able to go to the earlier groups. We've got a few that start around 9.30/10.30 & they are perfect now as I she gets tired out there & then we are home for lunch and then a nice long afternoon nap.

For me it has always been worth having a routine because you get so much benefit from having babies that sleep all night. But the downsides are that you can't do much in the evenings - other people seem to be able to take babies to evening barbecues etc in summer but both mine have had a routine that means bedtime is no later than 7.30 - so if we've tried to take them out in the evening they have ended up in a terrible state by about 8.00! - and that we have to turn down invitations to mid-day events.

Overall though, I would rather be a bit restricted in those ways but know that my children will sleep from 7 until 7 every night.

Original poster
beyoglu · 04/12/2012 15:13

Kitty I'm starting to think I must be quite unusual as well... I dunno, I might've been less routine-focused if I'd had them one at a time/far apart in age, but I quite like knowing when they're going to be asleep! Means I can schedule the grocery delivery at least :)

Chigertick we get badges? Where is mine?? I probably need to pick that up from the baby clinic (ahaha yes that's on from one till 3 as well...)

OP posts:
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