AIBU to say no to my friend?

[wigglewiggle32]

We have a dog. She was a rescue dog that we got as a puppy. She is some kind of terrier cross. She is not only beautiful but she is the lovliest dog ever, lovely temperament and great with the kids.
When we got her as a pup 2yrs ago my friend asked if we could let her have pups with her boy dog as she and her mum want another pup.
Well, my dog is tiny, we thought she would get bigger but she is very small. She weighs just under 4kg so is considered an XS dog.
Ive now said I wouldnt be happy for her to mate with my friends dog as he is a cocker spaniel, not massive but a lot bigger than my dog.
She is LIVID with me. Ive had a couple of nasty texts and a snide facebook status aimed at me.

I dont think I am being unreasonable! She could die and/or really struggle if her pups were too big and to me that is a risk Im not prepared to take.
I feel bad but I honestly thought she would get a bit bigger. So, AIBU? I cant see a solution to this, my friend doesnt want a puppy from her if we mate her with another dog.

She isn't trying to be responsible. She has an unspayed dog that she is considering breeding, not with the friends dog, but another one.

So that's not responsible.
That's a BYB.

"To be fair the OP sounds like a very loving dog owner who is trying to be responsible".

I'm sorry but that couldn't be further from the truth. A loving owner, someone who cares about their dog and ALL dogs would spay or neuter their pet as soon as possible.

And even if the OP is considering breeding her dog so she can keep a pup, and have that ongoing connection with her dog when it has passed on, what happens to the other pups? Do they get bred too by their owners?

Yes, generally. The kind of person who will jump in and thoughtlessly buy a puppy off a BYB is the kind of person who will go on to breed that pup. Generalising or not, it's true in the majority of cases.

My point is that what she wants to do is irresponsible but I don't think she's doing it out of a desire to make money or that she has a lack of regard for animals.

So why is she doing it then?

Because I did ask her that up thread and got no reply.

You cannot breed just because you feel like it.
Its terrible.

No, perhaps not through a desire to make money Narked but it can only ever be a blatant disregard for the individual animal and others of its species to not neuter.

And I know that her good intentions don't alter the outcome for the future pups or their pups, but they do make a difference to the discussion, because when someone genuinely cares for the animals (and isn't in it for the cash)they might change their mind.

Going to leave this thread because it's like banging your head against a brick wall with this kind of issue. and that so very many people do this.

It always is thyme, always.

No matter what, people still continue to breed their dogs, and give the puppies to any person off the street with enough money.

And the rescue centres get fuller, and the amount of healthy dogs PTS rises.

She said she wants to do it to maintain that connection with her dog when it has died - she would have it's pup still with her. She said she regrets that she didn't have that link with her previous dog.

So what about the rest of the litter?

Where will they be?

In my flipping back garden probably.
That's not a reason, it's selfish.

I would reiterate to the OP that the very concerns you're expressing for your dog - that she could be injured or die as a result of being bred with a larger dog and not being able to birth the pups - would be the reality for any pups of hers you passed on/sold and their pups.

Why not see how many dogs are now around from that one litter of pups your previous dog had.

3 pups are born

One owner doesn't breed from their pup

2 pups have a litter (of 3) each at age 2

So after 2 years there are 6 pups plus the original 3 = 9 dogs

Two owners don't breed from their pups

4 pups have a litter each at age 2

So after 4 years there are 12 pups + the previous 9 = 21 dogs

3 owners don't breed from their pups

9 pups have a litter each at age 2

So after 6 years there are 27 pups + the previous 21 = 48 dogs.

It's this woman's problem if she falls out with you and everyone else, including possibly her fiance! There should be no problem saying no and blocking her on Facebook.

Hello

We know that this topic brings out strong feelings in a lot of people, but please remember the Talk Guidelines and don't launch personal attacks on other posters.

I never did the maths before, but damn those are some big numbers!

I really, really wish there were tighter controls or any control at all on breeding pets.

Hmm. Let's see. Approach A - you really should think very hard about getting your dog spayed (goes on to list all the extremely sensible reasons)

Or shall we try approach B, aka the tactic adopted by 90% of those who post on these threads, involving much frothing, personal abuse and expressing view that op is not fit to have a dog?

Seriously, if the welfare of animals is really your prime concern, which approach do you think is more likely to encourage someone?

Or can I assume that the most important thing is simply your chance to do a bit of arm chair warrioring and feel all superior?

And can I just repeat if so many of you work for/with rescues. Every time you tell someone who works part time they can't have a dog or that dogs can't be left for more than two hours at a time or other such nonsense, you send someone else straight to the breeders and puppy farms. Stop being so precious.

They are FuzzyPickleHead. And that's the 'responsible', dog lover scenario, with each owner only allowing their dog to have one litter, not what happens if people are looking for cash or are just careless eg letting an unspayed bitch get out.

My staffie was one of six, dumped at six weeks old, barely weaned because some idiots thought they would get £200 for a puppy.

I am well aware about what being a responsible dog owner entails. I am one. And you lot are alienating me. So just have a think about how you come across more generally.

Some dogs are too small to breed and it would kill them regardless of size of male. Our dog was teeny and vet said no pregnancy for her.

I wasn't trying to imply you wasn't responsible with your own dog.

But puppy farms, BYB, people who buy puppies because they look cute, all of that makes me sick. It makes me sick when rescues are havi g dogs PTS, that people want to buy from BYB when there are so many dogs in rescue.
It upsets me that someone would think its a good idea to breed their dog without giving care and thought to where the pups will go.

I'm not questioning your ability as a dog owner, but I won't agree that the op should breed her dog with anyone.

I've fostered dogs so mistreated it makes me cry. Dogs, like BigDog who was locked in a crate, in the dark all day and night, who was kicked and beaten to try and toughen him up and sold out as a stud for a BYB.

I Just wish BYB didn't exist, and tbh I agree with the home checks, lifestyle checks etc as for the most part it ensures rescues go to good homes.