Too much time in playpen for toddler?

[lexiss]

This morning DS 17 months woke up at 6am. I got up bf him and put him in the playpen. It is one of those extra large, hexagonal playpens.

Around 6.15 I gave him some water and changed his nappy. Then I went back to bed after making sure the playpen had only safe toys and the baby monitor was plugged in.

I fell asleep and woke up at 8.30. I went out to see DS and he was happily playing with this toys. He is very into small manipulative puzzles, shape boxes, stacking cups etc at the moment and he was busy playing with these.

He had been in the playpen for nearly 2.5 hours! Is this too long? Is there a problem that he plays happliy for this length of time by himself?

Most days I have a nap during the day for an hour or so and DS spends this time in the playpen but I have never left him for 2.5 hours before.

What do you think about this?

Yes I've read the entire thread and whilst I don't share the poster in questions viewpoint I also don't feel the need to badger her about it for 20 pages derailing the thread, though given in this instance she hasn't done much to discourage it.

The majority of posters however do seem to be focusing on the one off incident of the op falling asleep. She did then go on to say that she goes off for a nap for 'an hour or so' every day while her child is awake and this I feel is a bit neglectful though not quite the 'severe neglect' that's been mentioned.

I've had a severe bout of flu last 4 days and have barely slept. I would love nothing more than to pop off to bed right now but seeing as I have a young child to care for it's just not an option.
And no I'm not a martyr just a responsible parent.

LOL at moominsarescary.

This thread is fucking mental, and I say that as someone who is officially fucking mental.

Play pens are neglect?! On what planet?

I agree with those who say it is safer if the OP naps in the same room. Can't see the harm in having a nap if the child is safe and content in a playpen though, as long as you are sure the child isn't able to climb out.

Nothing Mrsd if your child is in the same room which does'nt appear to be the case here. Are you seriously suggesting regularly leaving a 1 year old child unsupervised is perfectly fine?

I put my 19 month old in a cot in his room every day and go for a nap. I also put him in another room to go to sleep at night. I'm assuming if he's sick, try's to climb out of bed, is upset etc I'll hear him just as well in the day as I do at night.

I'm still at the comment "you can't hear a fire" which was made earlier in the thread. Do fires not occure at night? Do people not have smoke alarms

Golden please try and read posts.

I did not diagnose you with MH issues, why on earth would anyone do that over the internet?

I asked if you had any MH issues then quantified why I asked.

Would you honestly PM someone who has answered your posts in such an overly aggressive way?

I apologise if you would have preferred I PM you and I apologise if you felt offended by the question but I maintain that having MH issues is not an insult. In fact I would imagine that the many people who have experience of MH issues would find that view offensive.

I am concerned by your posts on this thread and others have said the same. They really are very extreme.

It is not your views that are concerning, many people share them; it's the aggressiveness and the persistent misinterpreting of replies.

If you had at any point posted something along the lines of what InNeed suggested I would have thought no more about it.

We've all got over-involved in threads before and said things which in hindsight we realise were over-the-top because we got caught up in it and couldn't be proved wrong, I know I have. Afterwards I've usually either hidden until I hope people will have forgotten or apologised depending how embarrassed/brave I feel!

I'm sure there are a few odd souls who bear grudges but the majority of us are more than able to disagree on one subject and laugh and joke on another. You and I may well have spoken before I honestly have no idea, I'm not very good at remembering names. Well I tend to remember names but I often have no clue as to why I remember them IYSWIM

I will stop posting now as it's clear to me that however genuine my posts are you will not see them as such and will continue to feel I am attacking you. I hope it's clear to everyone that that was never my intention.

Maryz, quite a few lies you are stating in that post. I think YOU MUST be getting me mixed up with others. Things I didn't say quoted from the above post by Maryz:

• 'The ones where she has said the OP is extremely neglectful and must have been neglecting her child on a regular basis'.

Where did I say this, I DIDN'T, I said on 2 different posts and I quote, 'it is NOT extreme neglect, but there are degrees of neglect.'
On another post I AGAIN said it was not extreme neglect!

-'The one where she called the OP selfish and lazy'.

Where did I say she was selfish and lazy? A poster at the beggining of the thread before I arrived on the thread said she was lazy. I don't know about selfish. Please provide quotes as proof.

THESE ARE ALL OUTRIGHT LIES or you are getting me mixed up with posters THAT DID say these things.

Equally, you have exaggerated my comments about my friend's DS - I never ever once said he had extreme delays. I actually said he was the last to reach developmental milestones. They don't mean the same thing atall and you have deliberately misconstrued those points to support your own.

My comments about Choola's DN followed her aggressive post towards me that included calling me 'BatShitcrazy'.

Please provide quotes to back up the points you're asserting I made Maryz?

(Ok I really am going away but I just wanted to answer Acceptable before I go!)

The first quarter of the thread was very normal yes.

The OP presented a situation and asked for opinions.

She was given many different responses with many different points of view.

She took them all on board and decided on an appropriate course of action.

She went away quite happy and it seemed the thread had served it's purpose.

Then it all went bonkers and became a huge debate about controlled crying, persistent neglect and developmentally delayed children.

I agree it's very bizarre and not at all helpful to the OP but thankfully she had what she needed from the thread before all the nonsense started.

I have Mrsd, what's your point? The op's child is 1 or 17months if you want to be exact. Still young enough to be dependant on an adult for pretty much everything.

Maryz

Randall

MrsDV

Anyone else feeling the need ...

I'll come and see you sloshed lot later :)

gratefully received

Ds3 happily chatters to himself at night and in the morning before going to sleep and when he has just woken up.

I put him down for a nap the other day and he was there for 2 hours, I could hear him talking the whole time and kept thinking he must be tired, he wouldnt be still lying there if he wasn't. He didn't go to sleep though.

He is in no way neglected, if he wanted to get up he would have shouted for me. Some toddlers are obviously happier to spend time alone than others. None of my other dc would have been happy to entertain themselves for that long. I can't think of anything I've done differently with ds3 than I did with the others. He obviously just has a different nature, or maybe he just likes to have his own space occasionally after all the fussing and attention he gets from his older brothers.

Maryz, you made out in your previous post that they were direct quotes but they weren't where they? Proven by the extracts you have printed above.

You have also deliberately taken the quotes out of context;

'FFS, what indulgent lives you must all lead'. I was responding to the notion that getting up 6 in the MORNING is somehow freakish. You know damn well that I wasn't referring to the OP, so why are you twisting it?

Yes I questioned why a 17 month didn't make one squeak when left for 2.5hrs on his own awake! I find that pretty incredible so I assumed CC must have been used at some point as it is well documented that such a practice results in a baby giving up on calling/crying out because they know their calls won't be answered. I was using a personal reference to casual aquaintance's baby to show how that seemed to be the case.

Where was all this swearing I was supposed to have done?

I've never used cc, maybe it would be better not to assume

OMG Goldenbear you are STILL here? Still getting all uppity and paranoid! Aren'y you exhausted / bored / both of it by now?

Really, I think you need to unclench and walk away. You've been like a dog with a bone for 3 days!!

Cc does not teach the child that their calls will go unanswered!!! It just means that they will not call out / grumble when unnecessary. Yet they will
Call out and continue to until needs are met when there is an issue such as hunger , loneliness etc!!! Don't try and explain something you have never used!!