To wonder what the fuck is going on?

[namechanger11111]

I've got to be quick because not so dp is coming over soon.

We've in the last few weeks got back together after splitting for a few months. It's not been 100% great and we might have rushed things a bit. He was seeing someone else but broke it off for us to get back together.

He hurt me a lot during getting back together by putting her feelings before mine.

Anyway I've just logged into his yahoo inbox and there are several video calls between the 2 of them from after we got back together. I'm shaking and I feel sick that he's done this. I want to talk to her but I don't want him knowing.

He's also just come back from a weekend away he was supposed to take his son on but ended up going alone so he says.

I want to talk to her and find out the truth before I confront him because he'll fill me full of bullshit as usual.

He lost his phone the other day and freaked out that i'd taken it and it never leaves his side.

I don't think you even need to ask her, do you :(

End it now, give him no further explanation. Just tell him you don't think it's working.

He has been yanking your chain all this time. I'm so sorry.

If you don't trust him and you feel bad and shaking and sick, this is not the relationship for you. A relationship should be good not bad. It should make you feel happy and secure not sick and ill. Don't bother talking to her, talk to him. Just get rid. You don't need to know details, even without them, this doesn't sound like a good, solid relationship.

I want to know the truth I suppose. We've had such a lovely few days as well :( .

What a bloody fool I was getting back together with him.

You weren't a fool, you just made a mistake. Learn from it and move on. Next time you won't make the same mistake.

You don't need to speak to her because its quite clear he is lying to you.

You are in a relationship with him not her

As Glaikit says, you kind of already know the answer don't you? It sounds like he's keeping both options open and if I was you I've give him the heave ho before he gets off that fence and potentially decides to go back to her. Even if he decides to choose you, it he really a prize worth winning? Being happy on your own is way better than being unhappy in a couple.

It is clear isn't it. You don't have a 115m video call to talk about the weather do you?

I just can't bear the thought of him going back to her if I dump him.

He doesn't have to go back to her. He's with her now. Save your dignity and leave him.

Trust me when I say you are better to tell him where to go, you don't owe him an explanation. Even if he does go back to her he will more than likely end up doing the same thing to her with someone else. You deserve more.

He's not much of a prize though, is he? Get rid, love. You don't need to talk to her.

But she might tell me the truth, he never will. He's done similar loads of times before and I've forgiven him. I'm such a fucking mug.

You are not a fool. You wanted to believe him. He's stuffed up again. So priority for you is now you. He had a chance and blown it.

Don't feel humiliated etc.
Take your anger and use it as a positive force to tell him he's been busted and to jog on.

Have you got RL support to hand you tissues and let you rip up cushions? I hope so, use them.

I'm shaking like a leaf and he's coming over for take away and movie night with the kids. I'm going to have to try and be normal until they're in bed. At least he hadn't moved back in again. I will have real life support but am not looking forward to having to tell them I've fucked it up again.

How do you know you will get the truth from her? She owes you nothing, she might say anything.

And he would probably deny whatever she said, leaving you not knowing what to believe.

What does it matter? The end result is the same - get rid. Let her have him and count yourself lucky that you're cleverer than her.

You know the truth, you don't need it confirmed. It will just make you look like the screaming harpie.

Leave the bastard and be able to hold your head high. Keep your dignity.

NameC - remove the "I have stuffed up" thoughts. You didn't. He did.
Trusting people is not a crime.

I don't think asking the other woman will help because she will only tell you what is to her advantage.

Lots of strong vibes for you tonight.

Don't contact the ow. Just end it with him. If he goes back to her then she gets lumbered with the arsehole, not you. Good news!

He's going to be here any minute so I won't be able to come back for a little while. Thanks for all the support, I don't have a clue what i'm going to say or how i'm going to hold it together until bed time.

It's been a really tough weekend.

He admitted to the web caming but went mad thinking I'd hacked his computer. He said that they only talked and he did it because he can talk to her but not me.

The long and short of it is I've told him i can't be with him if he's still in contact with her. He won't tell me that he will stop so I've made the decision for him.

I'm not waiting around for him to throw me a crumb so I'm gathering my last shreds of self respect and I'm walking away.

Well done. It's really hard now, but in time you'll realise that you did the right thing.

Best of luck. x

Well done. I know it's hard but one day you will look back on this & be proud of yourself. I went through similar with my ex & don't regret walking away, just that I didn't do it sooner.