To think that just because I look a bit different doesn't mean

[FrenchRuby]

That it's ok to lean out of your car and shout abuse at me? Or make rude comments.
I have blue hair and lots of tattoos and piercings. Now I do know that this is entirely my choice and I do expect odd looks, which to be honest I don't get now nearly as much as I used to but still the the odd double take or people saying they like my hair etc.
Yesterday I was walking my son to school and standing at the road waiting to cross and some guy leaned out of his van and shouted 'Urg what the fuck is that' at me.
It's not the first time people have been rude. A while ago I was sat on the bus with my dh and an old lady leaned over and said to us 'I feel so sorry for your little boy, he is going to be so ashamed of you when he is older'. And I once had a lady tell me that I'd never get a boyfriend with all that metal in my face. How do people think this is ok, just to comment on people's appearance like that? By all means think it, I don't care what people think, if I did I wouldn't look like I do.

Clipped - someone mentions the murder of Sophie Lancaster, which is extremely relevant to the o.p, and that's all you can say?

Did you mean to sound quite so heartless?

I don't read newspapers and i don't watch the news so I don't know about that poor unfortunate person

Did you mean to be quite so assuming goth?

'I don't read newspapers and i don't watch the news'

Maybe you should start? Perhaps you'd stop spouting such rubbish.

i never realise about Sophie so sad.
No one should be abused just because of how they look. if people say its ok to abuse someone for their choice of hair colour or tattoos that make them stand out, then they should also say its ok to abuse someone for their fake boobs and fake tan, that makes them stand out and its not. personally i would love to have bright pink hair a girl in work does and it look great, but I'm not brave enough. i don't like to stand out, but i consider myself far from normal. who wants to be normal that's just boring and I'm proud when my kids say they are not normal. it means they will be brave enough to do their thing and not follow the crowd being normal.
be proud of yourself op. your hair colour, tattoos and piercing make you unique and not a sheep, that's something to be proud off.

Well outragedfromleeds Id rather not if it makes me so shouty Maybe you should stop reading them then you wouldnt be so outraged.

Pierings and others do make you unique, I dont have a problem with any of it, it you want to walk down the middle of the road naked, i will go hey how unique but i know round the corner is a bastard that will kick your head in. Is it worth it? subtle change is far more damage limited, it may take longer but fatalities are going to be less.

Piercings of course

Tattoos and piercings do not make you unique, loads and loads of people have them.

You can post the same thing over and over clippped, but it's still going to be wrong. Telling people to conform/change/fit in or they'll get their head kicked in is wrong. You need to tell the bastards to stop kicking people's heads in. The problem lies with the abuser, not the victim ALWAYS. It is the abuser that needs to change not the victim ALWAYS. It's a shockingly simple concept.

I've always wanted blue hair. I wish I'd done it at uni. Now I work in corporate suit-wearing land it is off the cards for me - for now!

OP, what utter bastards for shouting abuse. Just think how empty their lives must be to have to resort to that kind of thing for fun. Keep your head high and live as you want to m'dear.

That is all.

I never said it was right outraged, I just added my view of another subtle lasting way round it.

sorry if unique was the wrong wording, but they don't make you a sheep following the crowd and copying them to fit in and people with tattoos, piercings and bright hair are not as wide spread as those without and no 2 people will have exactly the same making them unique, unlike those (unfortunately ds3 being one) that have the same haircut as a friend and buys the same clothes to make sure they fit in.

and I agree outraged that telling someone they have to fit in of suffer the consequences is wrong we should be teaching everyone tolerance of people no matter what they look like and show none for those that think it acceptable to abuse someone for the way the look.

Right ok then I sort of feel that you are liars where conformity is concerned, do any of you buy something that your children want because all the others have it? Can you honestly answer no?

If you say yes then you are surely hypocrites?

Clipped that is nothing to do with it!

Would I buy my child something if they wanted it because everyone else had it? Yes, probably.

If my child was being called names or being beaten up because they didn't want it even though everyone else had it i.e. they weren't conforming, would I tell them they should 'suck it up', 'conform or take the knocks'? No, of course not!

'If you say yes then you are surely hypocrites? '

I don't think you understand the conversation tbh!

WEll it's NU of you to feel upset when people make rude or offensive comments but to be quite honest if you 'fill your face with metal' then you can hardly expect people not to stare. they will always stare, and quite possibly be fascinated and revolted by it, in equal measure. If you can't deal with that then perhaps you should take them out.

(the facial piercing I mean) Bit late to do much about excessive tattoos though.

WTAF are you blithering on about.

I don't think anyone said that non-conformity was morally superior to conformity (whatever conformity means but ISTR you think it's about not looking 'different' when you have kids or something). Nobody's said that someone with blue hair or piercings is better than someone with their natural hair colour and no piercings.

And what the everloving god that has to do with buying your DCs Buzz lightyear I do not know.

But most people HAVE said that having blue hair, piercings, choosing to look 'different' (as the OP put it), don't deserve to be abused by members of the public. That nobody, however their appearance differs from whatever 'normal' is, deserves that.

I think you are maybe thinking that how other people choose to colour their hair reflects some sort of philosophy whereby anything 'normal' or usual is bad? Hence the buying something for the DCs comment? And if someone chooses to 'stand out' they aren't allowed to participate in anything mainstream?!

or not. Honestly I have no idea and I'm tired of trying to work it out.

yes i have brought things for my kids because they wanted what there friends had, with ds3 being he worst culprit for this, having gone to have a haircut today the same as his friend and telling me specifically what clothes he wants because another friend has them. but that doesn't make me hypercritical it makes me a caring mother not everyone is brave enough to stand out from the crowd and im not going to make him miserable by forcing him to he has enough problems as it is. personally i never buy anything just because its what everyone has. i buy things because i like them.

I started talking a load of shite from 10 O'clock and it's now 4 lol

You sound like a lovely mum foxy.

What that person did OP was above and beyond. It was abuse. Of course it was, unfortunately you are more of a target for arseholes than someone that doesnt dress/look like you. It will be the case a thousand years from now because that is human nature whether people choose to believe that or not. what I tried to say in my direct and maybe clumsy way was you are going to have to take the knocks more than me because of this. You have a choice and if you choose to be different then you will get more attention from wankers.

thanks .
i think that's kind of the point is that it shouldn't matter what you look like everyone deserves to be treated the same and should be happy to express themselves whether it is wanting to have the same as everyone else like ds3 or being different. i have 5 kids and they are all different and all i want for them is to be happy to express themselves without having be be worried about being abused because of the way the look whether it my "mosha" ds1 or "chavy" ds2 & ds3 or my "girly" dd or my ben10 loving ds4. they should all be happy to wear what makes them comfortable not what society dictates they wear or risk a bashing.

if that makes sense it is early and i have been up for 21hrs

WEll it's NU of you to feel upset when people make rude or offensive comments but to be quite honest if you 'fill your face with metal' then you can hardly expect people not to stare. they will always stare, and quite possibly be fascinated and revolted by it, in equal measure. If you can't deal with that then perhaps you should take them out

I said in my original post that I'm used to people looking or staring and yes I get the odd dirty l