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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask if you 'ignored' being possibly pregnant? And WIBU to?

31 replies

newmummytobe79 · 15/11/2012 15:54

I did this a few years ago - Christmas was coming and it was a definite maybe (eratic periods but a longer gap than usual). Enjoyed the Christmas spirit ... a little too much ... and bled. Thought I was due my period, but bleeding stopped and a few days later the little lines appeared :)

Baby was fine but looking back I feel dreadful.

Christmas is coming ... there could be a slight chance of another maybe on the cards (although guessing not just yet)

So - enjoy the lead up to the festivities ... or test at every feeling sickness/pound gained to avoid drinking at a few weeks gone?

OP posts:

Alisvolatpropiis · 15/11/2012 15:56

Um, I suppose if you actually suspect you may be pregnant you should do a test and then see if you do actually need to abstain?

Pandemoniaa · 15/11/2012 15:56

I didn't know I was pregnant with ds1 until it was too late to worry about a few beers taken very early on. However, if you are actively ttc, why would you want to risk your baby's health by the sort of drinking that might do so? Christmas can't be that important, surely?

Original poster

newmummytobe79 · 15/11/2012 15:59

Don't suspect yet - just feel bad drinking when TTC

Suppose it's just like any time of year really - weddings/birthdays etc

Think I need to stop worrying and just not go mad anyway ... plus I'm a nightmare after a few so it'll be nice for everyone if I don't drink too many 's

OP posts:

Gravenwithdiamonds · 15/11/2012 16:02

I thought that drinking before implantation wasn't supposed to affect the baby ie, before 6 weeks?

But you only have a two week window between conception and being able to do a test - I would skip the alcohol personally for that short a period though I doubt the occasional glass would actually do any harm at that stage. I would worry more about not being able to abstain for two weeks (me not you!)

FellowshipOfFestiveFellows · 15/11/2012 16:08

I am pretty about this, but I was a little pissed when I found out I was pregnant with my dd.
Had been trying to conceive for 6 years with no luck, lots of tears, erratic periods etc (due to undiagnosed at the time Poly-cystic Ovary Syndrome).

Meanwhile, mates who had been with their dps for literally 10 minutes were popping out babies unplanned every few months. One of them even admitted to me, in tears that she didn't actually want the baby at all (not nice as she knew I was desperate for a baby). Anyway, I decided to give up, stop wrecking my mind over why it wasn't happening at all- I barely drank for the whole 6 years as I was desperate to stay healthy to up my chances. We had a barbecue in our garden, and, yet again a friend announced another baby (meaning another god child for poor childless us).

I got through a fair few glasses of wine (cough) and laughed to dp he should sneeze on me and I'd get pregnant. I then went to the loo, and decided to play a joke on him, by drawing lines on a pregnancy test (we had the things stockpiled as I was always late and used to think I was pregnant). I couldn't find a pen so peed on it anyway, thinking I'd tell dp the one line equaled pregnant and we'd have a jolly good laugh. Except it was actually positive after all. all round I can tell you, I'd only just decided not to bother trying and within a month odd I was pregnant. Ridiculous.

DD is now 5 totally healthy term baby, average at everything except maths which she is very good at (unlike me).

Do a test, or you'll always feel "what if" over the slightest thing, trust me.

EuroShagmore · 15/11/2012 16:12

I don't see why you wouldn't test if you think you might be pg.

OHforDUCKScake · 15/11/2012 16:13

Easy, if its positive dont drink.

If its negative, fill your boots.

Original poster

newmummytobe79 · 15/11/2012 16:18

Congratulations Fellowship! Glad all went ok :)

I guess it's just because I can easily go 60 days without a period ... which takes me over Christmas.

I will be sensible this time and test early though

OP posts:

KellyEllyChristmasBelly · 15/11/2012 16:18

If you are going to really go for it over xmas then just stop TTC until next year.

FellowshipOfFestiveFellows · 15/11/2012 16:29

Newmummy, you might want to get checked out for the same syndrome as mine then. My periods are a pain in the arse to keep up with due to it.

SantasComingFace · 15/11/2012 16:36

I think there's a big difference in not knowing you are pregnant And getting drunk and not checking out if you are pregnant just so you can drink and plead ignorance.

I drank alot before I actually found out I was pregnant And felt bad afterwards. But I had no idea that I could be.

If you think you are surely you just check?

RyleDup · 15/11/2012 16:49

I got pg with dd over christmas. In fairness I had no idea, and didn't suspect at all until late January. I was really worried, it was only after she was born I found out about the 5 or 6 week inplantation thing.

FeckOffCup · 15/11/2012 16:53

I went on a hen night when I was about 3 weeks pregnant and didn't know yet, I was TTC but had been doing so for a year so had no idea that month was the month I had conceived. Thankfully the hen night was a fairly civilised one with afternoon tea in a posh hotel and then a show at night so not all centred around drinking, I knew about the pregnancy by the time the wedding came round a few weeks later though. If you think you might be pregnant then I would probably POAS once a week during christmas/new year and try to drink moderately, I don't think you need to put your life totally on hold when TTC though.

StepfordWannabe · 15/11/2012 17:03

I played a rugby final and then went on a hen night (VERY busy weekend) when I was around 5 weeks pregnant and completely oblivious to the fact. I had been TTC, sort of, but just carried on as normal really and things worked out far more quickly than expected i.e. two months after starting I was preggers. However, I felt awful that I could have unintentionally hurt the baby. Next time I TTC, I really watched what I ate and drank and did, basically I behaved as though I was already pregnant - it took a whole fecking year to get pregnant as I was so paranoid and stressed out about being the perfect baby-incubator. Basically, my point is relax, live as normal, test if you notice any odd symptoms.

FlangelinaBallerina · 15/11/2012 17:25

If you think there's a chance of another on the cards and you're either just pregnant or just about to be, odds are you'll be dog rough with morning sickess over Christmas anyway. I got pregnant in the second week of November last year, and had a sad little Christmas dinner of a bowl of cornflakes followed by several grapes, as it was all I could stomach. Even being in the same room as alcohol was impossible. So you may find the issue doesn't arise! This is a cruddy time of year to get pregnant, you miss out on all the festive stuff. If you think you're just pregnant now, you're going to be in prime morning sickness territory this time next month.

needtono · 15/11/2012 17:33

Have namechanged

I had absolutely no idea I was pg - had been ttc with no success for over 2 years. Had periods as normal so of course assumed wasn't pg, no symptoms at all. Drank like a fish over Christmas and NY.

My baby was born with SN which may or may not have been caused by alcohol.

That's the reality of my life, that's what I deal with every single day. I have to look at my DD's face and know I may have caused her to have SN.

You are being a fucking fool.
POA Fucking Stick.

Glitterknickaz · 15/11/2012 17:40

Well with DS2 I thought I might be, had a birthday event type thing so I POAS. It was negative. So I imbibed.

Two days later still no period so POAS again... positive. Ooops.

OldMumsy · 15/11/2012 17:40

My twins were conceived in alcohol probably on Christmas Eve. They seem to be reasonably normal and achieving.

I did not intend this to happen, I just believed the rubbish that it takes ages after stopping the pill to get pregnant. It doesn't. Obviously I stopped as soon as I realised, I had a post implantation bleed that I thought was a period that didn't help diagnosis.

So whilst not ideal it's not so bad. just being human is a risk.

Floggingmolly · 15/11/2012 17:42

Why would you "ignore the possibility"?
This isn't the 1950's, when a pregnancy test had to be sent off to a laboratory for processing, leaving you in limbo for several weeks. Piss on a stick!
This is the dumbest thread I've seen in a long time

OldMumsy · 15/11/2012 17:45

I saw pregnancy test kits 2 for £1 in a shop recently so it wouldn't be too expensive to test each week. Hope you have a great Xmas OP

AitchDee · 15/11/2012 17:46

Gravenwithdiamonds, do you really believe that the embryo doesn't implant unless 6 weeks?

I think you need to brush up on your biology before offering advice.

Original poster

newmummytobe79 · 15/11/2012 17:47

Floggingmolly - it isn't dumb. If you had read my other posts you'd have seen that I have around 60 days inbetween my periods, therefore the whole of December could be a possibility. Therefore do I worry/POAS every day? Or just carry on as normal and just POAS if I really think I could be.

I think the key here is to not get paranoid and carry on as normal. Test if I think I am.

Thanks for all the helpful/real life comments on here

OP posts:

Glitterknickaz · 15/11/2012 17:48

Or try weekly/before any nights out?

sleepyhead · 15/11/2012 17:49

You should test if you think you might be pg, but I know what you mean, I had an irregular cycle which mean that the so called 2WW was meaningless as I could go 10 days over without having a period and not be pregnant.

We were TTC unsuccessfully for over 3.5 years before I got my BFP and to be honest I'd stopped expecting anything except disappointment and also stopped testing until I was a good week over the average length of a cycle for me. Only so many of those negative sticks you can tolerate.

So anyway, I got the positive result a week after my 40th birthday, and I had more to drink (although by no means loads) that week than I would have done if I'd known. I'm not going to beat myself up about it.

Original poster

newmummytobe79 · 15/11/2012 17:49

I will Glitterknickaz :)

OP posts:

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