To leave my 7 year old to entertain my 3 month old while i have a shower?

[ontheedgeofwhatever]

DD is responsible, sensible and totally adores her little brother. This evening I had a shower, leaving the door open and asked her to keep an eye on him for 10-15 minutes and call me if she needed me. The phone rung while I was in shower and it was my friend. i called her back and said I'd been in the shower and she asked who was looking after DS. When I said it was DD she launched into a long lecture about how I'd put DS in danger and put too much responsibility on DD.

Now worrying whether she's right. DS didn't move from his baby gym for the whole time and DD sat next to him singing and playing with the toys.

So mumset jury was I being unreasonable?

Not at all. A three month old can't move or get itself into trouble and your older child knew where you were.
I imagine some people don't ever pee alone again once they have kids.

YANBU. I'm almost 8 years older than my brother and used to love having that kind of responsibility. I remember watching him like a hawk. I took the phrase "keep an eye on the baby for 10 minutes" very literally :). Nothing untoward ever happened.

Tell your friend when you want her advice you will ask for it.

Sounds fine to me!! I think it's good to take a shower every once in a while :D

Yanbu, please don't worry :)

I think that's ok, if she is sensible, and you trust her. You weren't far away and you weren't very long. I wouldn't leave them for much longer than that though.

Nope. But the tinfoil hat brigade will tell you that you are.

I think it sounds perfectly reasonable. Don't worry about it at all.

Yanbu tell your friend to get tae fuck!

Honestly, do people really talk like that to friends? Arsehole.

YANBU

YADNBU.
I have a similar gap between my first and third. Whilst I would never leave them alone in the house together, DS1 often would keep an eye on DS3 whilst I showered, cooked, put washing out, etc.

YANBU. DS1 is almost 8 and keeps an eye on DS3 (6 months old) every morning while I shower. They sit on my bedroom floor and I shower in the en suite, so I'm about 10ft away and can see them the whole time.

DS loves looking after his little brother and is very sensible about it.

Practically speaking, what else are you meant to do if you're a single parent or your OH leaves for work early? I hate showering at night and feel really manky if I don't shower in the morning. I also don't want to have to be up before DH leaves for work at 6:45am! Needs must.

I don't think you are at all. My 7 year old will often watch his little sister for me while I have a quick shower or make myself a cup of tea. She is 18 months and is pretty lively - so much harder work than a very young baby.

I always leave the door open and am near enough to hear if DS calls me. He knows all the rules about looking after a baby/toddler (keep small objects away in case of choking/don't let her put anything around her neck/climb on things etc). He takes it very seriously & I think it is good for him to have that sort of responsibility, just for very short periods while I am nearby. They play in his bedroom together and DD loves being allowed in there with him.

Based on that, I don't think it is unreasonable - you know your DD and how sensible she is. Maybe I'm wrong though - I've never really questioned it before...

Well said mrs Keith. I read that in a Scottish accent..

As long as your DD is trustworthy enough to not pick the baby up and swing him around but will leave him where he is, even if he cries, and you were only 10 - 15 minutes then it's fine.

YANBU!

I do the same myself, well, it's 8 and 1 now.

oh dear, i leave my 8 week old with no one watching him when i shower - i'm a really shit mum then!

Meant to add my ds is 7 and keeps an eye on ds 6m whilst I shower etc. I just plonk baby in gym or whatever and ds sits there watching cartons next to him!

I have a 7y/o and a 10month old and have a shower while he supervises, are you not supposed to leave the room, take baby with you wherever you go? Yanbu, tell your friend to mind her own business

When I was 7 I was allowed to make the family meal by myself so I reckon if I could handle sharp knives and a dodgy gas oven at that age, then taking a peek at a baby is easy!

YANBU - is your friend the op from the other thread about showering?

yanbu.

I used to leave mine in his cot when he was tiny so I could shower. I think a sensible 7yo is perfectly capable of keeping an eye on her little brother.

For a shower with door open and her ability to come get you I think its fine. Showers are not really long are they? And its not like you go deaf completely is it?

I have the door open to the bathroom and dd runs about and plays. Shes 2. I dont ask her to look after anything but what other alt is there unless shes in the shower too....

Yanbu. What is a 3 month old going to do? Your friend is an idiot.

I used to leave the tv to entertain ds1 when I had a shower.

And ds1 (aged 2) to entertain dd while I had a shower.

And ds1 and dd to entertain ds2 while I had a shower.

I never spent much time in the shower, but I also don't get this "children can't be left alone for a second". It's a ridiculous way to make new mothers feel guilty.