To of laughed loudly when dp said this...

[Wheresmygalaxy]

Door bell goes and as im sat with ds on my knee feeding him i asked dp to get the door (secretly already knowing it was Jehovah's Witnesses), so off he goes thinking its his dad popped round.

He opened the door and was faced with 2 older gentlemen whose first words to him where " Hello, Can i ask do you have a question you'd like to ask god?"

My dp thought for a few seconds and goes, " yes, how can i get rid of this flu? Ive tried beechams and lemsips but nothing shifting it!"

The 2 men stood stoney faced and persuaded him to look into his sole for meanings of being unwell i could see them through the window and just couldnt stop laughing

[EuroShagmore]

I'll mock anyone who stands on my property and tries to convert me to believe in their form of sky pixie. I feel it is a very rude intrusion to knock on my door for that purpose (and yes, I do understand why they feel they have to do it but I am not keen to have it inflicted on me).

[LauraPalmerPlusOne]

thank you Taggie, my teeth were beginning to itch...

[LauraPalmerPlusOne]

[SirBoobAlot]

Your DP is a genius

And actually, I think anyone that comes onto my property to try and convince me of their views without me inviting them is prime target for a laugh. Anyone is welcome to believe whatever they want, I just don't want it shoved down my throat.

My dad used to tell them he was unable to talk right now as he was heading off to give blood.

[Wheresmygalaxy]

@fakebook, Laura you really need to unwind a bit if a few spelling mistakes make you that uptight.

You must be a nervous wreck reading some of the thread on these boards.

[MaMaPo]

My heart currently breaking for poor oppressed JWs everywhere.

[Feminine]

Why is it not impossible to just say "no thanks" it works.

or, why not just ignore the door?

I'm not a witness...but I am done with the acceptance on MN that it is fine to mock them.

This would have been even less of a story, if it had been anybody else.

I'll say again it again, unless you have been the victims of cowboy witnesses, they wouldn't have told you to "look to your sole/soul" (or whatever) to help you get over a cold!

[SirBoobAlot]

Feminine I had a JW tell me that I could cure my disability if I followed their way.

Think this is perfectly plausible.

[Marzipanface]

My dad used to tell them he was unable to talk right now as he was heading off to give blood.

Please can I use this?

[CouthyMowEatingBraiiiiinz]

If a Jehovah's Witness came knocking on my door, and asked me if there were any questions I would like to ask their imaginary friend God, my first response would be to reply "Do you really think that it is better for children to die than for them to have a blood transfusion?". And I'd argue that God was telling them to put him above their own children, and a kind God would never ask anyone to choose between their religion or their children, and that I can't respect or believe in a God that expects that. Then I'd ask them what God says would happen to my Dad, who took his own life. Which was the catalyst for me examining my beliefs at the ago of 12, and settling on not believing in any imaginary friends.

[MaMaPo]

Why do we have to ignore someone who comes onto our property and intrudes on our evening? I quite enjoy a bit of verbal sparring. On the other hand, anyone like that, JW or otherwise, is free in response to say 'I can see you're not interested, I'll leave you to your evening.'

See. Happy people all round.

[Wheresmygalaxy]

Im shocked that anybody would choose to be a cowboy witness?

Again im not mocking their beliefs, or anyone's at all, I'm laughing at my dp's response to them. Yes he could of easily said no thanks and closed the door but he didnt he chose to say something funny instead.

As for why always the witnesses, Around here we dont get any catholics, Christians, Mormons or anyone else knocking trying to convert us. The only people that knock is usually jehova's witnesses, so thats why it seems like its always them.

[CouthyMowEatingBraiiiiinz]

I'm not mocking JW's, I just have DEEP objections to their beliefs after my friend died from something totally survivable had her parents allowed her to have a blood transfusion. Which they didn't. So I find that particular aspect of that religion abhorrent. And I won't leave that to go unchallenged.

And there are plenty of other JW beliefs I find disgusting too.

[mum2threesons]

His response made me laugh

[bruxeur]

Feminine - "I'm not a witness"

CHINNY RECKON

[LauraPalmerPlusOne]

It's not a mistake to confuse of and have - there is nothing to 'mix up'. It is NEVER 'should of', 'could of', or 'would of' (despite how your accent may guide you to think this is correct.) It is ALWAYS 'should have', 'could have', or 'would have' (or 'should've', 'could've', 'would've'.) Likewise with you're and your - if you want to mean 'you are' then it's ALWAYS 'you're'.

I'm not uptight, but I think that if you're old enough to post on an adult forum, then you're old enough to learn to write correctly. These aren't 'spelling errors' that you're making, they are a show of ignorance.

But I still think your DP's response was brilliant and I would have laughed, too.

[MurderOfGoths]

So JW wouldn't tell someone to look into their soul for why they are ill? I must have imagined the time JW's told me and DH that AIDs was because people sinned and God was punishing them.

If someone comes uninvited to the house to try and force the householders to change their religion/mind/political preference/gas supplier then I think it's fair enough to give witty/daft responses.

I remember someone coming to the door canvassing for votes, my brother scooted over to the door on the computer chair, crashed into it and fell off his chair. Then he opened the letterbox and stuck his fingers out of it. (Brother was a carpenter/glazer/odd jobs bloke, and his fingers were covered in dirt/dried blood/cuts) And then he says, in a voice that would have been perfect in Royston Vasey, "Hellooooooo?"

Surely at this point you'd walk away, but no, they tried to talk to him.
"Could we come in and talk?"
"Um.... noooooooo?"
"Er.. well are you planning on voting for us this year?"
"........NOOOOOOO!!!"

The bloke practically ran away

[Alisvolatpropiis]

The only reason JW's are "easy targets" is because they go door to door harassing people (in a very polite way to be fair).

One once attempted to convert me and my group of friends in the street. We were all 5-8 years old. Parents were not happy.

I have lots of questions for them. I live in a very Muslim area so don't see them about at all,but if I move I'll look forward to a knock at the door. My first question shall be "do you really think it is better for your child to die than have a blood transfusion?". My second will be "do you realise doctors can legally override your wishes about this if it's to do with a child or if they think you are not giving informed refusal for yourself".

OP- YWNBU to laugh at your DP. It was funny.

[MsElleTow]

Years ago some JW's knocked early in the morning after DH had been rushed I to hospital in the middle of the night by ambulance. I had DS1 who was 2 and baby DS2 screaming for a feed. They wouldn't go away and kept saying is there anything God can do?

I was getting really pissed off and snapped " Not unless he is going to pop down to babysit!" They were quite shocked, but they could see I was fraught and should have just gone away in the first place!

[Alisvolatpropiis]

CouthyMow on actually reading the replies it seems we think alike!

[MurderOfGoths]

"Not unless he is going to pop down to babysit!"

[MadamTwoSwords]

Oh do fuck off pedant's.

OP I found it funny, good for your DP. If people choose to disturb people on their property then they get whatever response the householder chooses to give.

[sixlostmonkeys]

The best way to deal with these un-invited intrusions is humour. The OP was a good one.

Reminds me of a few years ago. I had been trying, unsuccessfully to lay laminate flooring. I was exhausted, frustrated, bruised, battered and on the verge of tears. One of the religious door knockers knocked on my door (interrupting my work) And asked a similar question as in the OP but mentioned being friends with Jesus. I replied with "Great! You are a friend of Jesus? You couldn't ask him to nip round here and give me a hand with this floor could you? He's a carpenter isn't he? Just the man for the job!"

I'm sure these people and even Jesus himself would scorn such a response. I doubt God gave me a sense of humour but not his own son