to come to the conclusion that the vast majority of men online dating are just on it for a shag?

[soontobedivorced]

or is it just me. And every one of my single female friends. Do men really not want relationships any more? Going to be a huge number of sad lonely old men sitting around in their rented flats surrounded by cats living on beans and smelling of pee in a few years time. You watch and see.

Eloquently and superbly put Fishwife. It all depends on the circumstances.

Oh F off Tulisa there is nothing funny about a guy sleeping with women then fobbing them off with work is so busy, call me if you need anything, and all your tantric shit. whether you are for real or not I think it's in pretty poor taste that you think this is something to joke over.

Been on 21 dates so far in past 12 months and still looking, and anyone would tell you I'm an attractive, smart, kind, genuine person with no drama or hang-ups, plenty of friends and a lot to give and I didn't jump into bed with the vast majority of them either.

There's no need for that sort of language soontobe. No-one has been left confused or unhappy by my DP's actions - he's the model gentleman and makes sure that any further contact is handled in a respectful, sensible fashion whenever needed . I'd consider the erection of a featherboard fence to be the action of a very caring individual, and I think most people feel absolutely the same way.

Hmm. Well I don't expect many of them are planning the hymns for their weddings. But sometimes these online dating meetings can lead to something more permanent. Or so I've heard.

You just have to be very clear

No meeting for dinner on forst date because if they are awful your stuck for the whole evening

Also meeting pretty quickly i think men wo want to email for months on end is a bit dodgy also it makes you like the person yu imagain them to be most people can be funny and witty on line

I had about 7 dates before i meet oh and some were just

Meet one guy got on so well after the date went for a coffie and were chatting away then he jumped up and said shit got to go he said it was lovley to meet up but i got o meet my probation officer in 20 minutes he got blocked from my msn chat

That's not nice fishwife. Some of the best people I know have spent time in the slammer and have become true pillars of society afterwards. Their outlook on life is often highly refreshing. If he was a nice person when you were chatting, why would you block him?

Sorry i have a child and dont date people who recently been released from jail

As well as smokers
And vegetarians( i like meat to much)

You have every right to be cautious Fishwife no matter how that manifests but find out facts maybe nect time. He may have not paid a fine or something...?

Sorry the facts are i just simply dont date men out jail you dony usually go to jail for not paying a fine

Each o their owan

YANBU. My sister did online dating for a year and was asked, on different occasions by different men..if she liked sex toys, and what her favourite position was. The first time they met. And she was convinced that over half of the guys she met were married.

You don't have to have been in jail to have a probation officer.

Not debating about this any more there are more than enough men out there who have not been in trouble with the law for me to date and i found one

I have a child and have been down that road of bad boy law braker Back in the day

Some people dont like short men i dont find ones with a wrapp sheet sexy just my personal taste

Speaking on behalf of all men yes we are there primarily for a shag. This is because it is our no 1 preoccupation. We do this because we like sex a lot and thanks to online dating we get more. Remarkably we do this shagging with other woman, who askance to the evidence of mumsnetters, actually like shagging as much as we do. If you think that is strange, the guys who are not there for a shag are weird, live with their mum or are gay (possibly all 3). At least when you are online dating, you know what you are getting! Best regards to all you Mumsers

Thanks for that enlightening post, Burt

Btw you are not speaking on behalf of all men. Twit.

Tulisa your posts are hilarious please keep them coming, your DP sounds like a wonderful mix of Mr Darcy, Don Juan, Aristotle, Bob the Builder and Sting !!

I havent done OD but someone very close to me has and I have followed her exploits closely this past couple of years. Overall she has met 50:50 want a shag want a relationship. She is now seeing someone from POF and it seems to be working out, certainly if it doesnt it will be because they arent right together nothing to do with meeting online if that makes sense.

I am with yourhand earlier and the more I see and hear of men the less interested I am. I am 46 and its been 3 years since my marriage ended and thus far I am almost worryingly disinterested in meeting a man. I think if this changes I would consider OD but with a suit of armour and a pinch of salt !

Tulisa out of interest did you meet your DP online ?

Dhs friend used a dating site, he has found his love interest now - but it scared the shit out of him as he is a nice bloke, who genuinely wanted another relationship. He said all the women (40-50) were desperate for a shag, dropped their drawers on the first date and women who wanted to be treated like ladies with some old fashioned chivalry were very few and far between.

You see he is a complete mysogonist by MN standards - he expects to open car doors, pull chairs out at restaurants, stand when a woman comes into a room, buy dinner, not expect sex until much further down the line even when it's handed out on a plate , to have common interests and be able to have conversations.

getting - I've talked about our introduction on the 'don't look down my shirt thread'. its a truly inspiring tale about putting yourself out there and opening your heart to emotional vulnerability.

At a bowling alley ?

Anyway I will say, whoever you are, you are far funnier on this thread than that one.

I don't do internet dating anymore, have a hidden profile that I unhide now and again when I'm really bored. Never seem to message anyone and organise a date this way as I cannot be bothered to keep going on exchanging meaningless messages.

I did do internet dating some years ago and found it to be different then, went on some 'nice' dates but never met anyone who floated my boat.

A male friend of mine says that his single mates go online just to meet women for a shag, I can see the appeal for men who are mostly up for it and not too fussy. So I reckon OP might be right.

I also think it's a manufactured way to meet someone and doesn't really work. (cynical me)

Tulisa, just read the whole thread and your fantastical posts. I would be worried about her with the featherboard fence, I reckon your DP is smitten and could run off with her soon.

Ophelia
Oh, now I know what a "mysogonist" man means, as I had assumed it was something like a chauvanist pig. Don't like the latter, but love your definition. My late DH was gorgeous like that yours - they are the real gentlemen that real gentlewomen want.

And for those men who really believe that all , if not most, women are gagging for a shag, are deluded.

TulisaLover is a strange one, isn't she ?

A good imagination, that's for sure ..

Hatesponge, if you are still reading you don't sound bitter and manhating to me. You sound intelligent and realistic, and resistant to lying bullshit.

ophelia Opps The "Mysogonist " is your DHs friend, not your DH. Ah, chivalry how I miss it.