Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To not buy a poppy

492 replies

Hippymum89 · 09/11/2012 10:38

Why is it more important to remember the death of a soldier who died fighting for the country (or so he believed) than the death of every other person who has died?
What about all the others who have died helping others? Were their lives less important? Or the little old lady who died in hospital at the age of 97, she didn't kill any Germans, or rescue people. She lived her life, but doesn't that count?
I think poppys glorify war and therefore murder, so I will not be buying one.

OP posts:
FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda · 09/11/2012 11:18

The British Legion paid for the adaptions my Dad needed to stay in his home in his final year. While the help was very gratefully received, the cost to him was the loss of his best brightest years. Sent to Burma at just 17. Years of fighting in the jungle, before being shot and coping with years of PTSD.

My Dad hated war. He hated his medals and refused to wear them. He always wore his poppy with pride and made sure we did the same. He made us go to the remembrance service every year although he never went himself because it was too traumatic for him.

WorraLiberty · 09/11/2012 11:18

squeaky you are lucky enough to have been taught about it. i certainly wasn't and i'm sure tehre are posters here who weren't either. not all posters were born and raised in the UK

No but we've all got an internet connection and the ability to Google, haven't we?

That would have answered every single ignorant, emotive question in the opening post.

ethelb · 09/11/2012 11:18

offensive to what? poppies?

Or is it offensive to state that war is tantamount to murder? Why? it's true.

BooyhooRemembering · 09/11/2012 11:20

i'm not arguing Lteve. i just dont like that someone not knowing something automatically means they deserve to be sworn at and called names. there really was no need for some of the agression shown on this thread. if you dont agree with her tell her why. if she is wrong, tell her why. direct her to links where she can find an answer. if you dont want to do that then fine dont respond to her. swearing and calling her names is hardly likely to bring her round to your way of thinking.

anyway i see OP has run off and isn't going to stay and defend herself (cant blame her really she isn't going to get a chance) and i'm certainly not going to take her place in being your (plural) verbal punchbag for today. so i'll go to.

WileyRoadRunner · 09/11/2012 11:21

Or is it offensive to state that war is tantamount to murder? Why? it's true.

So whilst Hitler started to gas women,men and children the rest of the world should have stood by? Confused.

Lovely.

Feminine · 09/11/2012 11:21

Well, it actually worries me that op thought as she does/did

She must have done basic history at secondary level at least

Children wonder too don't they? mine have lived abroad for the last 7 yrs, they didn't know anything about the poppies ...I have explained to them.

Actually the school did too.

mmmerangue · 09/11/2012 11:22

TBH OP I agree with almost all of your sentiments...

I still buy a poppy, like I put money in the lifeboats box or the Marie Curie box at the various times of year they come to prominence. Apart from that I try to keep to local charity.

You do sound like you are pitching for a fight with your OP tone.

I could be callous and say why they are worth it even though they 'glorify war and murder' as you put it... Those soldiers were MURDERED so that you are NOT. They saved your life. If zee Germans had won, sure as hell they would have found a reason to 'cleanse' the world of you, or your parents. So you would not be here - therefore I wear the poppy.

Wars are still happening now, and we should continue to keep that at the front of our mind, consider those who are still dying needlessly and hope for an eventual end to war, everywhere - theres' another reason I wear the poppy.

This is the poem I share on Nov 11th. Yes I 'thought of it' myself.

Remember Remember, this 11th of November
Good Men who died for a cause
And ask yourself what happened to
"The War To End All Wars."

XBenedict · 09/11/2012 11:22

"My Dad hated war. He hated his medals and refused to wear them"

My grandad was the same. He never claimed a single medal, my mum got them after he died because we are still to this day so proud of him and his comrades.

ArbitraryUsername · 09/11/2012 11:22

To be honest I don't buy a poppy because I really think that we shouldn't need charity to support war veterans. The state (which in the case of those who fought in WWII pretty insisted that men fought for them less it needed them elsewhere) should bloody well provide for those who put their lives on the line for it. And if that means everyone has to pay more in tax (including me), so be it. I just don't think that war veterans should have to rely on charity for proper care and rehabilitation (and to support their families and the families of those who currently serve). The fact that there needs to be a charity to support this reflects dreadfully on our government and society in general I think.

Although OP, I am also a pacifist and I think it's a bit silly to say that poppies glorify war. Remembrance Sunday is about those who died in war, and so it is a recognition of the utter awfulness of war. That's exactly the opposite of saying war is a good thing.

PickledFanjoCat · 09/11/2012 11:22

I'm sure my mothers 97 year old neighbour that died peacefully last year dosent begrudge people supporting soldiers this way especially having lived through the horror of world wars.

Think what sort of fucked up world you might be writing your idiotic and inane posts from if it wasn't for the bravery of these people.

BreeVanDerTramp · 09/11/2012 11:22

boohoy did you go to school? I can't imagine anyone educated in the UK could not have learned about Rememberance Sunday, perhaps you were off school every November?

Apologies if you were HE and have never had access to a TV/radio/newspaper/library Sad

BooyhooRemembering · 09/11/2012 11:23

notea

"A man who saved a person from drowning only to drown themselves is, of course, a hero. Especially to people who knew him or to the family of the person that would have died without him. But if you can't see how this is different to the hundreds of thousands of young men who lost their lives fighting to protect their whole country for generations and generations to come then there's no help for you! "

are you confusing me with the OP? i have said i wear a poppy and i know why i wear it. i did not ask why the military deaths were more important. OP did.

BeyondGoesOffWithABigBang · 09/11/2012 11:23

Not getting into whether I agree or wear a poppy or whatever, just want to point out that even people on this thread cant agree whether it is for fighters in ww1/2 (lots of whom were conscripted) or all veterans of all wars (no conscription) or even those fighting now. Which surely makes a difference in whether someone believes in the cause or not?

BooyhooRemembering · 09/11/2012 11:27

yes i went to school in a very catholic nationalist area in n.ireland. does that make it any easier to understand why i was never taught about poppies by either my parents or school? is it really so hard to see where other people may be coming from? your upbringing is not the same as everyone else's.

ethelb · 09/11/2012 11:27

Hitler didn't start the first world war. And yes, it would have been best if everyone had just stayed at home for WW1. Might have even prevented the rise of Hitler.

Murder is murder. It might be justified in some circumstances. It is still murder. If you are comfortable with rememberance day, why are you so uncomfortable with that face?

reindeerjumper · 09/11/2012 11:28

Because my grandfather died in active service and the RBL supported my grandma and her sons, one who wasn't even born.
Most men didn't have the choice as to whether to fight. The least we can do is remember their sacrifice.

WileyRoadRunner · 09/11/2012 11:28

Hitler didn't start the first world war

Nobody said he did Confused

GwendolineMaryLacey · 09/11/2012 11:28

I work with veterans. I wish those of you who dig your heels in about poppies and remembrance could have spoken to one of them for one minute.

ethelb · 09/11/2012 11:29

yes you did: So whilst Hitler started to gas women,men and children the rest of the world should have stood by? .

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda · 09/11/2012 11:30

Murder is murder. It might be justified in some circumstances. It is still murder. If you are comfortable with rememberance day, why are you so uncomfortable with that face?

Because it's remember the victims. Why is that so hard to grasp?

WileyRoadRunner · 09/11/2012 11:31

yes you did: So whilst Hitler started to gas women,men and children the rest of the world should have stood by?

at no point did i say this was world war 1 - you have quoted exactly what i said?

CookingFunt · 09/11/2012 11:31

None of my family buy or wear the poppy as I have familial links to Bloody Sunday. That does not make me ignorant or a Moran.

ArbitraryUsername · 09/11/2012 11:31

I'm not sure that it matters whether those who are being remembered we're conscripted or volunteered. I think the important thing is that we remember that war is always dreadful and that people always die because of it. It's important to remember the costs of war, so that countries don't go into it without proper consideration and awareness of what it actually means.

DuelingFanjo · 09/11/2012 11:32

"why are military deaths more important than others"

let's face it. They are not. Each death has it's own importance to different people. My father dying of a heart attack was important to me but not to anyone else. A friend's husband dying in Afghanistan was important to her family but not to me. However I can give her the same sympathy and empathy she gave me when my father died. I don't have to buy a poppy to show that empathy and care. I can buy a poppy if I want to, I can also show my support to heart attack victims if I want to - as can my friend but I am not going to demad she does.

No one would demand the OP buys a poppy and I can't understand why the OP would think anyone would.

ethelb · 09/11/2012 11:32

I don't necc think that people should have just stood by with Hitler. But well done for invoking Godwins law.

I do think that if everyone had stayed at home for ww1 then ww2 might not have happened.