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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to say to people I am not a girl, I am a woman.

111 replies

blueraincoat · 04/11/2012 21:11

Just that really.

It really, really grates when people call me a girl. I am not a girl, I am a woman, I haven't been a girl for a while now. I just find it incredibly patronising. Whenever I say this people sigh or tell me I am being pedantic. Am I the only one this gets to?!

OP posts:
ginhag · 04/11/2012 21:12

No one ever calls me a girl. But yes it would piss me off.

doinmummy · 04/11/2012 21:14

I call the females at work girlies . As in " Morning girlies" . They are all alot younger than me.

NellyJob · 04/11/2012 21:15

yeh it might piss me off but there's no point in pulling everyone up about it....
although I did once effectively pull a guy up about being called 'love' by pointing out to him that it was akin to 'boy' (he was Black) - and it really made him think.

NellyJob · 04/11/2012 21:16

doinmummy - how about 'morning everyone'?

Thisisaeuphemism · 04/11/2012 21:17

Every week when I pay the milkman, he says "good girl" - I should say something before I go mad.

LostInWales · 04/11/2012 21:17

I had stern words with my father last week when he described a woman who worked for him as 'a lovely girl' (she is in her 60's). He really didn't get my point . I hate 'girl' and 'girlies' Wink

squeakytoy · 04/11/2012 21:18

Cant say it bothers me in the slightest. Would rather be described as a girl than "that middle aged woman"..

blueraincoat · 04/11/2012 21:18

I don't pull everyone up on it. My granny said the other day something along the lines of "you have always been a lovely girl", I didn't turn round to her and say I am a woman granny!

OP posts:
RubyFakeNails · 04/11/2012 21:18
Biscuit
NellyJob · 04/11/2012 21:19

I particularly hate -girlie night in'out esp. when uttered by someone who clearly hasn't been a girl since about 1965.

SrirachaGhoul · 04/11/2012 21:20

I'm a girl. Always have been and hope I always will be. I wouldn't care in the least if someone called me a girl...in fact, I might think they were a kindred spirit Smile.

Viperidae · 04/11/2012 21:22

I think for some people it is just a turn of phrase. My mum is in her 80s but still refers to "the girl up the road" or "the girl next door", next door is in her late 60s!

Doesn't really bother me unless it is said patronisingly.

BadgersBottom · 04/11/2012 21:23

I didn't turn round to her and say I am a woman granny!

Why ever not? Were you facing the wrong way?

blueraincoat · 04/11/2012 21:23

But how about if a male boss/colleague called you a "good girl"?

OP posts:
germyrabbit · 04/11/2012 21:23

perhaps when you're 80 you will appreciate it Grin

does it really bother you? if i worried about things like that it would drive me a bit loopy

Sparklingbrook · 04/11/2012 21:23

I hate 'woman' I was a Tesco and was having trouble with the self service. The man/bloke/chap/boy on the counter said to his colleague 'this woman is having trouble' I hated that. Sad

NellyJob · 04/11/2012 21:23

as with 'love'it does depend on context and tone and meaning....

pigletmania · 04/11/2012 21:23

Well I am a girl Smile. Lost Mabey she does not mind, reminds her f her youth. My gran was forever 21. I say I'm going out with the girls, or meeting the girls tonight. My order friend tells e phrases such as "you go girl or "what a girl" don't think woman has the same ring. Really it does nt matter to me one bit

Thisisaeuphemism · 04/11/2012 21:23

I'm a woman, even if I'm as short as a girl.

How can I tell the milkman it's objectionable? If I annoy him he'll spit in my milk.

BadgersBottom · 04/11/2012 21:23

Just turn round and say something to them!

SrirachaGirl · 04/11/2012 21:24

...and you've reminded me to take off my Hallowe'en costume Thanks.

NellyJob · 04/11/2012 21:24

but sparklingbrook you are a woman....
what should he have said?
Laydeee?

blueraincoat · 04/11/2012 21:25

Yeah I probably should have said in the OP that is does depend on the context, it doesn't get to me all the time. I started the thread as a male friend was talking to me about a woman he liked and I asked him what it was about her that he liked and he said to me "she is a good girl".

OP posts:
BadgersBottom · 04/11/2012 21:26

I started the thread as a male friend was talking to me about a woman he liked and I asked him what it was about her that he liked and he said to me "she is a good girl"

Fuck yeah. Serious stuff.

Thisisaeuphemism · 04/11/2012 21:27

Do I have to turn around?

I dunno how to word it. "I'm not a good girl, I'm a good woman" sounds a little ...earnest?