to think that child benefit cuts are

[mumsfretter]

understandable even though we personally lose as a family, again! However, I resent people who are much much richer than us getting winter fuel allowance still.

Aibu that the two benefits should have been cut together on the same basis or not at all.

Child benefit-A benefit for all children.
All children whether bought into the world wanted or by accident, rape, marital break-up deserve to atleast be able to live of a decent standard.

Saying 'You shouldn't have had' children is pointless as the children are already living and breathing, why should they suffer?

Red

You mean, like how I was left with no job (he refused to do any childcare), no money (he cleared out our accounts and maxed out the CC on cash withdrawals) and no maintenance when my first husband left?

The child benefit was the only income I had for a month until my income support started, it was the only income I could rely on when we were together tbh. It happens, far more often than you would realise.

Saying that "they chose to have children" is as stupid as saying "you chose to buy a house" when someone cant earn due to illness or disability! We make decisions based on what we know. I knew that my husband loved me and we were secure, financially and emotionally, when I became pg. What I didnt know was how he would decide that fatherhood was boring and too much hard work and bugger off! Should me and my children have starved because of that?

And when times are tough, sometimes the only money coming in is child benefit.
Why should children starve due to opinion?

I would like to think as 'Great Britain' we would never let a child starve.

I would be very interested to know the incomes and assets of those saying that if you choose to have children you are on your own, no matter what happens!

And how many of the MNers who are saying that rely on a high earning OH to provide it

Bogeyface: are you actually saying that the state should be responsible for peoples bad judgement? I've backed a few horses that lost through no fault of my own, perhaps I should toddle off to the social and demand my money back.

I sometimes think that people have lost sight of why benefits exist. It is NOT because the government wants to play nice. It is because in the long run, it is cheaper than not having them. I believe it's called 'enlightened self-interest'.

Consider what would happen if 'the system' did not exist, and e.g. a large employer went bust. Large number of people out of work, no benefits, so homeless pretty quickly. Lots of them. No rents being paid, minimal food being bought. The wider community would quickly follow the unemployed into penury, with less tax coming to the govt etc. A small problem quickly becoming a big, possibly insurmountable problem. All because of a lack of a safety net.

That level of instability is expensive to the government. A bit of bridging finance allows people to stay in their homes, so the landlords/council/mortgage providers are still in business. The food shops don't close. The impact on the wider community is minimised, and the economy has more chance of recovering.

Like I said, enlightened self-interest.

Very interested too Bogeyface

red are you saying that my children and I should have starved because the man I trusted with my life, and had shown no indication of twuntness before that day, fucked off? My children should go without food and clothes because my husband turned out to be a complete cunt?

Seriously?!

I went back to work a few months later and we managed. But am gobsmacked that you think that a family should starve because of marriage breakdown, job losses, illness etc just because "they chose to have children".

That is utterly disgusting, and very short sighted as none of us can guarantee never being in that position.

Where

Excellent post

Oh well..... All i can say is that when the shoe is on the other foot some of you will have the misfortune to understand what some of us have had to go through and it isn't nice.

Gosh, do people really want to live in an 'every man for himself' society?

I'm assuming those who believe you shouldn't have children unless you can pay for them yourself don't claim CB for their kids, or have state school places or use the NHS.

Very good point whereyouleftit, a safety net for a limited time, is it Poland you get 6 months help? not decades like the uk

As I've said before on previous threads, this cut in child benefit is purely political to make it look like the 'rich' are shouldering the burden. The reality is that families with nearly twice our income will continue to receive it, while we will lose it. Friends of ours have a joint income of over 80k and three buy to let properties and will keep the benefit. We can't afford to buy a home of our own and will lose the benefit for 3 dc. It is wrong on so many levels and it is becoming clearer that the administration of this farcical policy will eat all the savings made. It will be a disaster, I am quite certain of it.

With regard to winter fuel allowance, I think it should be means tested. If it's good enough to take benefits from children, why not from rich pensioners? My PIL live in a 6 bed detached house and have a house in France. They say they need it as they are cash poor. The reality is that they have property worth over 1m. My dad freely admits to spending his on crates of expensive wine. YANBU.

I believe I have done society a favour by having children at something of a sacrifice in order that those children will become the workers of the future who will look after you old buggers who didn't have kids.
Or we're you hoping to rely on robots in the future. Or maybe Martians!
So yes society should pay me child benefit.

I truly hope that none of you naysayers ever find out what its like to have to live on benefits because you have no choice.

I wouldnt wish that on my worst enemy.

Flamin - I don't believe in Everyman for himself but I don't believe the tax payer should foot the bill for society's arseholes and run away spouses (I don't have the magic answer bogey) if I was in that situation I would support myself and child by any means necessary

I'm 26 weeks pg with my first so no cb claim yet although that will be going straight into a savings account for baby as me and dp don't need it (awaits accusation of stealth boast) I use the NHS as I've paid tax and ni half my life same as dp

Ah....double income, no kids yet! that explains everything. Come back in 5 years Pinkie and we will see if you feel the same then!

if I was in that situation I would support myself and child by any means necessary

Thank you for the biggest laugh of the evening!

12 week old baby, disabled 6 year old. Husband fucks off. I couldnt go back to my old job as I had no childcare after 6 pm and I finished at 6pm an hour away. I had severe PND (that was why the break up was actually my fault, I shouldnt have needed him to help ).

What, exactly, should I have done? Come on, put your money where your mouth is and tell me what I could have done in that circumstance?

And Pinkie, you do know dont you, that I thought about my ex the way you think about your DH now?

Your DH could easily turn out to be an arsehole run away dad, just as mine and countless others on MN have.

Pinkie sometimes the only means available to a person is state welfare. You've heard stories above from women who's exes cleared out their bank accounts, left them in debt and fucked off. What the hell were they supposed to do to support their kids when they had no other source of income?

I am sure 'all' the tax you have paid will totally cover the complete cost of your anti natal care, labour and delivery care, free dental care and scripts plus your childs first 18 years of health care and education

Again bogey how is your situation mine or anyone elses fault? Am I supposed to feel guilty because me an my partner both work hard and waited till we turned 30 to start a family??

No-one knows what the future holds just as I'm sure you didn't, if dp has a personality transplant and ups and leaves I'd have to get help with childcare from both sets of grand parents, am I supposed to feel guilty for having a supportive family network too? I'm not sure what you were meant to do, you're a grown woman I'm sure you figured it out just as many others have

Laugh all you want it just shows you have no room in that tiny mind for anyone's opinion but your own

Kitty - I agree with the welfare state but for a limited time, and no i don't think that's the only option for me that's the very last option

if dp has a personality transplant and ups and leaves I'd have to get help with childcare from both sets of grand parents

So my situation isnt your problem, but in your case, it would be your parents problem?

That is still relying on someone else, it isnt standing on your own two feet is it?
I do not have a tiny mind, I can assure you of that. But what I do have is alot of experience of things that I was certain would never happen to me, just as you are sure they will never happen to you.

Be happy in your certainty, it may not last.

you dont have to feel guilty pinkie for having a lovely life with supportive family and network....you just are being asked to show a little empathy for those that dont, huh?

well I thought my life was set to Pinkie

great job, husband who would die for us, had my first child at 32 - all 3 planned - husband owned own business etc etc

he lost his business, he had an affair, he left me while I was on Mat leave with a baby and 2 other kids - life changes and unless you have a crystal ball you should maybe not be so smug

I am being made redundant now as well thanks to this government

I have paid tax for 25 years - I want universal child benefit