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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to find the whole baby stage generally just a bit...well.....shit?

119 replies

bblue · 26/10/2012 10:11

For sure there are some wonderful bits, like the big grins, but it seems to me to be overwhelmingly mind-numbingly tedious. Lots of crying, lots of not sleeping (for everyone), wearing the same 3 revolting tops in rotation (breastfeeding) and constantly covered in baby sick. I have got an older child too, and while they have their own challenges(!) it definitely gets more interesting. A friend calls it the "baby conspiracy" - i.e. that you'll rarely hear a bad word about having a tiny baby (that's not immediately tempered by "but oh my god they're so worth it, wouldn't change it for the world") but surely it's not just me (and my friend?!). Or is it?

OP posts:
boschy · 26/10/2012 10:13

No def NBU. The baby stage are dull dull dull IMO. Teenagers now, they're wonderful! (and no, I am not being sarcastic)

laptopcomputer · 26/10/2012 10:14

No, YANBU. It is no fun at all. Much better once they get to 3!

JennyPiccolo · 26/10/2012 10:14

I liked it :(

EMS23 · 26/10/2012 10:15

My DH and I are with you, wholeheartedly! We're on our 3rd DC (my 2nd) and both feel like this. First 3-6 months are an endurance test for us.
When we've been honest with childless friends, they've seemed a but incredulous and thought we were probably being sarcastic.
A few, after subsequently having their own, have then agreed.
But some people do love early months to be fair.

EasilyBored · 26/10/2012 10:16

YANBU. DS is 10 months, and I think at about 7 months (when he started consistently sleeping through) I started to think there might be a light at the end of the tunnel.

I find him really fun to be around these days!

NiniLegsInTheAir · 26/10/2012 10:16

YANBU. Hated the baby stage, but once DD hit 1 it was like a fog had been lifted. She's nearly 2 and it's ace now.

Sirzy · 26/10/2012 10:16

Yanbu, I much prefer it when they can do thinks!

Sirzy · 26/10/2012 10:16

Things even!

WelshMaenad · 26/10/2012 10:18

Babies bore the shit out if me. I cuddled one the other day, she was nice and all, but I was more interested in the marauding toddlers.

MrsBungleBear · 26/10/2012 10:18

Just you and me then Jenny I love the tiny baby stage - sad to see it go! both of mine slept through quite early though so maybe that's why

yellowowl · 26/10/2012 10:18

I like it! I love the cuddles , and my DS doesn't cry much, so I guess it's easier then some have it.

Vagndidit · 26/10/2012 10:19

Definitely NBU. I could not wait for DS to get past the baby/toddler days. He's much, much more fun now that he's 4. Am planning #2 at the moment, but to be honest, I kinda wish I could just pop out an instant 3 year old and skip the beginning bits.

BeyondLimitsOfTheLivingDead · 26/10/2012 10:19

ds1 is 2, ds2 is 6m. It is literally getting more fun every day now :)

MerylStrop · 26/10/2012 10:19

Pollyanna time
You don't have to do any playgroup hell
You don't have to do any schoolrun hell
You can go out to lunch and art galleries and cinema and shops and they don't mind
The sleep-deprivation can be a bit of a bugger but we still have that 8 years later

Naghoul · 26/10/2012 10:20

YANBU, but they are worth it, aren't they :)

I remember being washed over with the oxytocin when my DC were born, the pure pure love.

I think that maybe that lasts longer for some people than others.

Ambi · 26/10/2012 10:36

I love it, the smiles, the only time when I'll be the most amazing person in the world to her. When you put them down they stay there and no back chat.

pigletmania · 26/10/2012 10:40

With dd 5 the baby stage was awful, hard with constant crying willing nothing we would do was right, hated it like a passion. Ds 9 months totally different, loving it, though it has ts moments, totally different experience

valiumredhead · 26/10/2012 11:01

What ambi said!

Sharksandfishes · 26/10/2012 11:04

Yabu!
The gummy smiles, the lazing around while breast feeding, the cuddles without them escaping...
DS1 is 3.5 and an absolute nightmare at the moment, DS2 is 10 weeks and utterly adorable! Grin

GoSakuramachi · 26/10/2012 11:05

If you have just the one baby, or older ones in school, its great having a little baby. You can do whatever you like and just haul them along with you. Not like toddlers when they speak and want stuff!

WitchesTit · 26/10/2012 11:06

YABU for being so negative

Ffs it's a matter of months or even weeks that they are defenceless newborns, a matter of months or even weeks before your boobs calm down and you get used to the broken sleep.

There's so much to get out of caring for a newborn, even if they cry loads and don't sleep ( and i've had my share of that) the time goes so fast!

Can't you just get into it and ENJOY it??

TheOnlyPersonInTheRoom · 26/10/2012 11:08

YANBU I hated it. The only thing that got me through it was knowing that by definition it wasn't going to last forever.
My girl is 1 now and much more ace now she's interactive.

It's hard because you don't want to rain on the parade of new mums hence the 'baby conspiracy' but really I much more appreciated it when people were honest about it. I heard "it DOES get better" quite a lot and they are right.

Any new mums I say something similar, because it's hard when you're in that fog to be reasonable and realistic about it.

HorraceTheOtter · 26/10/2012 11:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TeaBrick · 26/10/2012 11:11

Looking after a newborn baby? Fucking nightmare, wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy tbh.

Anythingforabitofpeace · 26/10/2012 11:15

DD is 15 months now and its yet to get easier. She is such a squealer, she squeals when she laughs, she squeals when she wants something, she squeals when I leave the room. She cannot be left alone. Ever. DS is 3 and is a dream. He was always a dream. DD makes me seriously doubt my parenting abilities.