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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think drivers who beep me are complete idiots who should have more respect for for others?!

100 replies

Bunny2012 · 26/10/2012 07:34

I am a fairly new driver. As such sometimes I prefer to wait until there is a slightly larger gap before pulling out of a side road / entering a roundabout / turning right etc. I am such I will improve with experience and confidence.

This morning I was waiting for a gap to turn right. I was on a fast road, it was dark and rainy so I was struggling to judge whether I had time to go or not and waiting for a gap. The t*at behind me aggressively gave me the horn. This has happened before. AIBU to think drivers should show more patience and respect for others who might be newer drivers?

OP posts:
FangsGoForTheMaidensThroat · 26/10/2012 07:37

YANBU, you can't wait for more than half a second after lights turn green here or people start honking horn, drives me mad.

mutny · 26/10/2012 07:37

Really depends on how long a gap you were waiting for really. If you were sat there waiting for 30 minutes for a gap 2 mins long yabu. If it was only a short wait yanbu.
How are people meant to know you are a new driver? Why not get some of the green 'p' plates to indicate you are a new driver?
You can't expect other to just know.

lljkk · 26/10/2012 07:38

Most people are in a ridiculous hurry.

MrsDeterminedandSpecialMum · 26/10/2012 07:38

Have you got a new driver sign on your car? I'm more patient then. However, if I've got to be somewhere such as picking up my children for nursery/ school or going to work and someone is taking forever to turn off the road or pull on to a roundabout I do start to lose my rag! Blush

Sirzy · 26/10/2012 07:40

Unless you are letting lots of massive gaps go then yanbu just ignore them and go even slower

MrsBucketxx · 26/10/2012 07:42

sorry had to [hgrin] when i saw he agressively gave you the horn [hwink]

maybe you should get some p plates if your not that confident.

if not a finger usually does the trick.

Original poster
Bunny2012 · 26/10/2012 07:43

Hi no I am not waiting for half an hour for 2 mile gaps - this morning I literally waited for 30 seconds. At the end of the day I would rather wait an extra 30 seconds than risk an accident. If other drivers are in such a hurry - well they shouldv'e left home 5 minutes earlier :I)

OP posts:
JaxTellerIsMyFriend · 26/10/2012 07:44

It sounds to me that you could do with some more driving lessons, to improve confidence.

Most people are in a hurry, but if you are being beeped a lot then it sounds to me that you are hesitating too long at junctions. This can be as dangerous as the drivers who pull out and there isnt enough space.

mutny · 26/10/2012 07:45

Tbh your op your title implies that this happens alot, so I would get 'p' plates until you are more confident. I can't recall ever being beeped at, if its happening often I can only assume you are taking a very long time.

impty · 26/10/2012 07:48

Green P plates.
I have seen a few rear end shunts because people behind the front car have expected them to go and they have hesitated.
If you put P plates on I think most people will hang back and be more patient.

OHforDUCKScake · 26/10/2012 07:51

You are such, are you? Wink

Im a new driver too, someone did this to me the other day then drove right up my arse revving. I panicked so drove at dead on 30mph so I wasnt in the wrong either way. This incensed her, cripes! Revving, beeping and when I turned into my road she sped of like a twat. She was behind me for less than a minute on a 30mph road wtf was her problem?!

Alisvolatpropiis · 26/10/2012 07:53

I hate people who do that. They're behind you so can't actually see why you're waiting! I also hate people who tailgate on the motorway. I take my foot off the accelerator.

I don't recommend p plates though,some arseholes will take liberties and be even more inclined to bully you because they know you're new to it and potentially a bit nervous.

BlackBetha · 26/10/2012 07:56

P plates wouldn't necessarily help, I've been beeped and yelled at in a driving school car with L plates (and a big obvious driving school sign on the roof) :(

VivaLeBeaver · 26/10/2012 07:57

I would get the "p" plates. I think the majority of people would give you more space/time rather than try and cut you up, etc.

RobotLover68 · 26/10/2012 07:58

Sorry I bibbed someone the other day - she kept cutting across lanes (not aggressively, randomly) then sitting at empty roundabouts for ages. By the 4th roundabout stuck behind her and her cutting into my lane yet again, I'd had enough. I bibbed to let her know I was there. Her driving was appalling at best and downright dangerous at worst. If she was a new driver not sure how she passed her test!

Bananapickle · 26/10/2012 08:01

When I took my test I got two minors for hesitancy which unfortunately means DVLA thinks drivers need to have confidence when making decisions at junctions.
As others have said as this has happened a few times for you, you either need to put P plates on or maybe do a couple more lessons to increase your confidence.
Unfortunately people are inpatient on the roads and this is standard so you will have to be the one to change to become safe on the road.

Shakirasma · 26/10/2012 08:03

Agree with others who suggested P plates. Not only am I more patient with P plate drivers, I give them a bit more room and anticipate hesitancy.

I nearly rear ended a twat at a roundabout on the way to work yesterday, I was not impatient or in a great hurry. I was behind them in the left hand lane. Massive gap appears, next car coming was only just in view (it's a very large roundabout) and they just didn't go. At least 3 cars from the right hand lane safely went before the car coming round reached us.

If I had hit that car it would have been my fault, and rightly so as we can't go round driving into stationery vehicles and we should always look where we are going. But that driver's hesitancy would have caused the issue as it is perfectly normal to anticipate the traffic to move when the way forward becomes clear.

P plates remind other drivers to expect the unexpected.

OHforDUCKScake · 26/10/2012 08:04

I was told hesitation was a major and you'd fail for it.

StatisticallyChallenged · 26/10/2012 08:04

TBH, I've not long passed and there wasn't a hope I was putting P-plates on as the drivers round here are ridiculously rude to people with L-plates IME. Really aggressive which can be pretty intimidating, and I have noticed it being done to other learners too so I don't think it was just me. My instructor also advised against it for the same reason.

DH noticed it (he took me out for a lot of practice) and couldn't believe the things people were honking and gesturing for - driving crimes like driving at 29 in a 30.... I've also had people try to cut around me and go past at busy roundabouts because they couldn't be arsed to wait.

Now, it could be that I was just a dreadful driver BUT there was one occasion we went out and both commented that it had been such a peaceful drive and all the impatient nobbos must have been at home. Then we realised the L-Plate had flown off....

BitOutOfPractice · 26/10/2012 08:04

I'm sniggering at him aggressively giving you the horn

Shakirasma · 26/10/2012 08:07

OHforDUCKScake your ate absolutely correct. I failed my 1st driving test for hesitancy, it was marked as a major mistake.

Alisvolatpropiis · 26/10/2012 08:13

I agree that people are aggressive with learner drivers. I always remind myself to be patient. But I've only been driving 6 years and still remember the utter mortification I felt when I stalled at traffic lights etc so give them a break.

I've seen other driver be horrendous when cars have p plates. Probably the same drivers who are horrible to learners but worse because they know there's no driving instructor (it does seem to inhibit them slightly).

OP,if you're not hesitating for ages then you're doing nothing wrong. It would be far worse if you were shooting around corners into busy roads without looking properly.

tanfastic · 26/10/2012 08:14

YANBU in my opinion. When you first pass your test you are still learning, learning to judge gaps comes in time. Sometimes a gap can look really small but it actually isn't. I used to always turn left to avoid the situation and go the long way round Grin.

When I first past my test I got P plates but found it made people worse and more aggressive so took them
Off.

It's a confidence thing and even now after years of driving I take my time to find a gap that I'm comfortable pulling out into and definitely don't take the risks some drivers do. I have though been involved in two accidents where cars have pulled out in front of me so I always have this in mind.

mutny · 26/10/2012 08:19

OP,if you're not hesitating for ages then you're doing nothing wrong.

if so why would you fail a test for it?

Alisvolatpropiis · 26/10/2012 08:23

mutny you fail tests for hesitation when you've left great big gap for no reason. Most people get failed for it at roundabouts where the view is perfectly clear. Happened to a friend of mine,twice. You don't get failed for making sure it's safe to turn into a busy road where your view may be obstructed/cars driving over the speed limit.