to not understand the words "I'm not a feminist"?

[bushymcbush]

I've seen this countless times on MN and I really don't get it.

Actually I've heard it quite a few times in RL too.

So, to those of you who are so keen to communicate your non-feminist standing, could you please explain to me which part of 'total equality between the sexes' you disagree with?

Alternatively, you could (gently) explain to me which part of that generic description of feminism I seem to have misunderstood?

Did you post on the wrong thread there?

I don't think anyone needed or asked for an exaplantion of feminism

I don't think anyone apologised for looking out for womens rights either or put themselves to the back of the queue

theodorakis Mon 15-Oct-12 14:32:29

Please can someone tell me what definition of feminism they are working from? Is there more than one?

I don't think feminism is just about addressing issues. It is, to me at least, about being a woman as well as a human and admitting that men and women are not the same but ARE equal.
NB. If OH is reading this, you are superior when it comes to dog shit and spiders.

A lot of people seem to think that feminism is about equality, and declare that they are feminists due to this belief.

Feminism, the fight for equality by focusing entirely on women

I don't think feminism does entirely focus on women.

Lots of feminism is about focusing on the status of women and men within male dominated society/attitudes to and behaviour of perpetrators of violence against women, etc.

Often it is about taking the focus off purely women (in rape for example).

This thread is ridiculous. The end.

It was fine during the day. We managed hours without any sceptismo faces. I am obviously too thick to post after 4pm

It has made me chuckle though! Let's all just have a and relax. (As long as the person who boils the kettle isn't doing so just because she has been brainwashed by the male dominated culture into believing she has no choice but to do so...)

Is it too early for a ?

Oh I wish, not sure the pethidine would go well with it! I will ask the nurse though, she may be kind. I have a huge plasma tv and a 3 piece suite in my room so it follows that a wine list should be available. French of course.

Pethidine is crazy stuff, are you ok?

Yes am feeling quite jolly! Hopefully going home tomorrow although am becoming a bit institutionalised, salivating when I hear the tea trolley!

Haha, oh yes, I remember getting home from hospital and wondering why I had to go prepare my own food again

My thoughts about Married in White were

Wow, how wonderful, lucky you, enviable , I agree with you
There was no smugness implied, but can understand how some would infer that. Jealousy ??!!!!.

It's funny,isn't it? Nobody ever says to people fighting for equality for people with disabilities "oh, but that's not fair, you should be fighting for the rights of black people as well". Or to anti racism campaigners "But what about gay people?" it's only campaigners for women's rights who are expected to please evyone else as well.
Interesting that. An interesting reflection on women's lives generally.

Agree that united we stand, divided we fall.

Would one suffragette on her own have changed anything? I think not.

Exactly, seeker.

It is not without significance I think that we women so often qualify our paying attention to our issues with reassurances that we have everyone's best interests at heart.

Perhaps a worthy sentiment, but I fear it is one that is easily hijacked and derailed.

(And typical of female existence.)

Agree seeker. Would anyone say to black campaigners "but what about all the white people?" The whole point of needing to campaign is that black, gay and female people have been the underdogs in history.

"Nobody ever says to people fighting for equality for people with disabilities "oh, but that's not fair, you should be fighting for the rights of black people as well". Or to anti racism campaigners "But what about gay people?" it's only campaigners for women's rights who are expected to please evyone else as well."

Nobody is saying that here either.
No one is telling feminists what they should be doing, however those of us that don't identify as feminists are being told what we should be doing.

"those of us that don't identify as feminists are being told what we should be doing."

Where?

There are lots of posts telling us that not calling ourselves feminists is totally inexplicable/makes no sense. And when things are described that way, it is usually with the subtext of "you should be doing" whatever it is about.

Of course if that isn't what is meant I am happy to be corrected, but would suggest reacting like it is a completely unbelievable thing to do is not the best way of going about things if you don't wish to seem to be telling someone what you think they should be doing.

Ok. emBOOsa- what are you being told you have to do?

That's a bit odd, boo. I for one have no wish for you to identify yourself as a feminist if a) you don't wish to b) you are not one

There's also a lot of posts with a straw-woman version of what the typical feminist is like. For what it's worth, I'm a feminist (and proud to be one). I also like men, have a sense of humour, have on occasion worn make-up, worry about the effect of the polarisation of gender stereotypes on boys as well as girls (I have a DS), think that marriage to the right person has a lot going for it, sometimes shave (though feel cross that I'm under immense social pressure to do so - unlike a man's beard, women's armpits aren't neutral territory to be shaved or not as a matter of aesthetic preference - if you're hairy, some people feel they can comment on your hygiene).