I just think that if they express an opinion on their hair, so be it, and I will go for that. Rather have happy children whatever their hair length, tbh.
I have one with short back and sides, one with Justin Bieber hair with silly in-the-eyes floppy fringe, and one who wants to have surfer hair if his hair ever grows.
Where does that place ME?
And as for DD - she expressed no opinion any which way about her hair until she was 14. Again, where does that leave me in your silly analysis?
My opinion is that they are the ones who have to go outside, they are the ones who have to feel happy with their appearance, if they choose to have longer hair, they are the ones who have to deal with getting it brushed every day.
Why is it up to me how they choose to present themselves?
I won't be forcing DS3 to get his hair cut if he wants it shoulder length any more than I would force DS2 to grow his hair longer.
Happy DC's matter far more to me than the style of their hair.