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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think toddlers with cold sores shouldn't be in nursery

132 replies

ScariestFairyByFar · 02/10/2012 20:54

One of the kids at dd's nursery had a big nasty cold sore last week now she has one. Argh! They don't let them in with cp and once it's done it's done as long as your not high risk, she'll have this virus for the rest of her life.

OP posts:
OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 13:35

You can comfort and look after a child without having close contact with them. I would behave the same if a child I was looking after had an obvious tummy bug as well. But as I have had to deal with sick on enough occasions and children have been ok, I haven't ended up with D&V and the parents have been thankful for my looking after their sick child, I think I'm doing fine.

ExitPursuedByJKR · 03/10/2012 13:36

Crikey - I would have missed out on great swathes of my education if I had to stay at home every time I had a cold sore!

I also did teacher training for a while - some times with a cold sore Shock

The idea of locking people away if they have a cold sore is bloody ridiculous.

And fucking precious.

Oinkypig · 03/10/2012 14:22

Just because you don't get cold sores does not mean you haven't been infected. If your parents/children/partner gets cold sores you will more than likely have had the virus with no symptoms and if you were tested you would more than likely have antibodies in your system you just don't get flare ups.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 14:38

But when your immediate family have never had a cold sore and we are not all about to be routinely tested, it's a risk that's not worth taking IMO.

I don't think there is any need for children to miss huge chunks of their education. When they are old enough to not need physical contact for simple things and they can look after their own personal hygiene and be trusted not to get to close to others, then there is no need for them to be excluded.

scootle · 03/10/2012 14:51

A cold sore is only very infectious for a day or two - once it has crusted over it is not infectious. So it wouldn't be a big deal to give a child a day off if they were infectious. ONce you are at school and know how to practise basic hygiene, it wouldn't be a problem.

Moominsarescary · 03/10/2012 15:04

Yabu, have you not read any story's about newborns dying due to contracting the Hsv-1 virus because there mothers had never had a cold sore so were unable to pass on antibodies to protect them.

Sorry it's the daily mail, there was a documentary recently as well. Bloody awful.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 15:11

Oh, so all these people that send their children into school with infectious viruses are actually doing us a favour. Silly me. Hmm

AnyFucker · 03/10/2012 15:19

Perhaps there was something in the old wives insistence on not taking your newborn out of the house at all ?

When is the cut off point for small babies to be introduced to the rest of society, bearing in mind that bloke sat next to you on the bus/woman in the Post Office queue/child at the christening party/health visitor weighing your baby/doctor doing your postnatal check etc etc may be incubating the cold sore virus ?

Some people must lead their lives in a permanent state of fear and apprehension. Those eople wouldn't want to know me, since I get a new cold sore nearly every month in tandem with my menstrual cycle. Should I be banned from working with tiny babies?. Take a couple of days sick leave every month ?Let's hope not.

ExitPursuedByJKR · 03/10/2012 15:23

Me too AnyF. Fortunately they have receded as I have got older. DD has never had one, nor DH, so they can't be that contagious.

Moominsarescary · 03/10/2012 15:23

Oh really get a grip it's a cold sore, unless you've never been exposed to one chances are your child is already carrying it

Moominsarescary · 03/10/2012 15:28

I had them alot up until my 20s and have never passed them on, the dc's have never had one, some people are just carriers and don't get out breaks, it's hardly bloody small pox.

ChocHobNob · 03/10/2012 16:07

My son gets cold sores. Large ones under his nose. Always when he's coming down with a cold. When he was younger and in non-compulsory education I would keep him off until it crusted over. It didn't matter missing a day or two and I was home anyway. He also didn't understand about being careful with it.

Once he got to compulsory education he stays at school. There is no medical advice to keep them off and he knows not to touch it or get very close to anyone else while he has it or they may get one too. No one else in the family have cold sores.

He has also had impetigo and we did keep him off school because the medical advice said to.

ShatnersBassoon · 03/10/2012 16:19

Have cold sores become dangerous since I was at school? I'm confused at people's thoughts on them.

Yes, they're ugly and can be uncomfortable, but they're so common and harmless I don't know why there's such disgust from so many. Is it the venereal disease association?

AnyFucker · 03/10/2012 16:29

There is no "venereal disease association" Smile

AnyFucker · 03/10/2012 16:31

I wonder if this thread is divided into two camps thusly...

  1. Those who have cold sores and don't view them as The Black Death

  2. Those who don't have them, and view those that do as Carriers of The Black Death, and a danger to their disease-free children

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 16:39

You are probably right AnyFucker.

Those who have them and don't see them as all that bad don't want to be inconvenienced by them, and those who don't have them just want to keep it that way.

AnyFucker · 03/10/2012 16:43

Oh, yes, I don't want to have ever been "inconvenienced" by cold sores either but I don't think "inconvenienced" is strictly what people in camp (2) were meaning Grin

charlottehere · 03/10/2012 16:45

I agree with you OP. They are very contagious and I wouldn't want my young child if they had one going as they need watching closley as can transfer to genitals. Sad Side effects from cold sores can be really nasty, life threatening for babies.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 16:45

I'm in camp 2, I don't see that keeping a small child who can't manage their own personal hygiene off nursery for a couple of days as any more than an inconvenience.

SrirachaGirl · 03/10/2012 16:47

YANBU.

Separate schools for cold sore sufferers, I say. They could have a leper's bell!

charlottehere · 03/10/2012 16:47

I think the whole HE thing is a red herring as school age children are far less likely to pass it on, I would think.

charlottehere · 03/10/2012 16:50

As someone who was in hospital for a week after an allergic reaction to a coldsore, I am defintley with OP. I couldn't eat for a week and was over 10 meds a day.

EdgarAllanPond · 03/10/2012 16:53

freddos you may already carry herpes virus, and you can pass it on without having visible sores.

so maybe you best never allow anyone in skin-to-skin contact with your kids at all.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 16:58

Maybe I have, but it is very rare for the virus to be passed on without having an open sore, so I doubt it.

Are you honestly saying you'd be happy to have skin to skin contact with someone else's open and weeping cold sore when you have never been bothered with them before?

EdgarAllanPond · 03/10/2012 17:00

asymptomatic shedding is present in 5% of herpes carriers - 1 in 20. not rare.

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