Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think toddlers with cold sores shouldn't be in nursery

132 replies

ScariestFairyByFar · 02/10/2012 20:54

One of the kids at dd's nursery had a big nasty cold sore last week now she has one. Argh! They don't let them in with cp and once it's done it's done as long as your not high risk, she'll have this virus for the rest of her life.

OP posts:
MummysHappyPills · 02/10/2012 21:32

Well I've never had a cold sore in my life, but had one recently after getting a bit run down after an operation and subsequent infection. I went to the gp as I thought it might be impetigo, but she said it was a cold sore. When I said that noone I knew had had a cold sore recently, she told me that almost everyone has the virus from early childhood, but for me it only "came out" after being run down from the op.

Obviously avoided kidding dd, but no doubt she probably will have got the virus from me before the sore appeared, and at some point she may/may not get a cold sore.

Keeping children off school for a cold site is frankly rudiculous.

AnyFucker · 02/10/2012 21:37

yabu

and uneducated

and precious

and yes, ridiculous

if I kept my children off nursery/ school when they had cold sores they would be off for 50% of the winter months

oh, and summer too since sunlight triggers them also

thekidsrule · 02/10/2012 21:44

ive suffered for years with these and mine always end up big buggers

ive tried everything to treat them and i mean everything

ive had more outbreaks in the last 6months than in 4yrs (but have been in a very stressful mode for moths) so deffo think that effects it

the last but one attack i had was hideous and very painful so i went to the docs,hes given me some anti viral tabs and as soon as i feel one i take these,they work and my last one 3days ago started hardly shoes and no lie is 90% better than it would of been

i do see why your pissed of op as if your child has caught this then it is for life,and will depend on many things whether she has them bad or not

its very hard when a child is little to stop them picking etc which will spread them and make them worse

so op i sympathise with you,not nice to get but then i do get them very bad

and dont get me started on them compeed patches

bumperella · 02/10/2012 21:52

I can understand why you're upset that DC has a cold sore, they are yuk. My then boyfriend-now-DH was v cross when he got a cold sore (always assumed it was from me).
HOWEVER, I also think from the actual facts of how they are passed around, how long they can last, and that ultimately they're unpleasant rather than serious then it's impractical to keep a child off nursery with them.

teacherandguideleader · 02/10/2012 22:08

My mum used to suffer with cold sores and would never go near me when she had one. At 24, my then boyfriend had one and passed the virus on. Instead of a cold sore I ended up with meningitis. I remember thinking that I wished I had just been exposed younger when I may not have developed meningitis.

I think it is impractical to keep the child off nursery, however they should 100% be kept away from newborns - developing meningitis from a cold sore is more common amongst newborns.

kissyfur · 02/10/2012 22:14

It is very dangerous for a newborn to get a cold sore, what about if a toddler gets a cold sore at nursery and brings it home and infects a newborn?

If my DC had a big nasty cold sore that was in its early, infectious stage I'd keep them away from nursery.

CerseiLannister · 03/10/2012 10:02

I agree with the OP that nursery age children shouldn't attend daycare with cold sores. The kids there share everything and are frequently hugging, rarely but sometimes biting etc. school age children would know to keep their cold sores to themselves.

My first outbreak was hideous. All over my upper lip and chin. I still have a scar. You wouldn't wish that on a young child.

The doctor at the time said to me that although the virus technically couldn't be transmitted via towels or crockery, if it were his family, he would never share these things while an outbreak was underway.

Feminine · 03/10/2012 10:05

A newborn baby is the only person that needs to be protected from children with them...

Otherwise, it is just one of those things.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 03/10/2012 10:09

Oh no.

I have spent the last 3.9 years hoping and praying that DD wouldnt catch the virus off me.

I have been lucky not to have too many outbreaks in that time but when I did I was super careful about everything.

Now after all that she could go to school and get it??

:(

Oinkypig · 03/10/2012 10:23

The first exposure to the cold sore virus can cause a systemic illness with ulcers in the mouth and feeling generally unwell. Only about thirty percent of people exposed to the virus show systemic symptoms. So 70% of people who have been exposed to the virus won't have symptoms. Around 90% of people will have antibodies to the virus by the time they are an adult, of these a third will have outbreaks. There are lots of different triggers to having an outbreak. You don't really get cold sores the first time you are exposed to the virus, a cold sore is a subsequent reactivation of the latent virus. So I can see why infectious children shouldn't be in nursery but most people are exposed to the virus by the time they are adults anyway..

scootle · 03/10/2012 10:44

Of course YANBU!!! People on here saying they send their kids to nursery with one are incredibly selfish - as are people who send their kids in with contagious impetigo. I get coldsores and am fastidious about handwashing, towels etc as I would hate hate hate to pass them on to my dds. So far, so good, but no child would be as careful as you need to be.

Kaida · 03/10/2012 12:43

YANBU OP. They're infectious, cause pain, can cause scarring, can turn into something really serious, can get nastily infected if picked at (which toddlers and children are likely to do) and no way will toddlers be at all careful not to infect others. I don't have the virus, my parents both do but were scrupulously careful not to infect me. DH has it but again, is careful on the occasions he has a cold sore not to infect me and DS. It's very common for toddlers in nursery to have newborn siblings, it's a common age gap, so dangerous to be so blasé about the herpes virus just because it's common.

iliketea · 03/10/2012 12:59

I hope all the posters who are talking about the herpes simplex virus like it's the bubonic plague keep their little darlings away from all public spaces and off nursery if they have even the slightest hint of a runny nose to stop their precious germs being spread around.

Read the information on it. Chances are that your dcs are already infected but haven't presented with a cold sore.

Scaredbutdoingit · 03/10/2012 13:09

Cold sores aren't pleasant, and its definitely not nice when your child catches one.

However, it has to be a case of weighing up risk vs benefit for both the individual who has a cold sore, and the general population.

An individual who has a cold sore may have it for brief periods or may have it almost constantly (depending on the state of their own health/immune system). So to ban children from nursery (or children from school etc) because of them could result in that individual missing out on huge chunks of normal living.

On the flip side, there is no very large or dangerous risk to the public, other than the risk of catching the cold sore (which yes, isn't pleasant but not particularly dangerous for the vast majority), and only if there is close contact.

TheSmallPrint · 03/10/2012 13:09

Being sleep deprived, stressed or ill (hence the name 'cold' sores) trigger them in me but so far my DS's haven't had one. As soon as I feel that tingle I whack on the zovirax.

A much worse virus to catch is molluscum contagiosum. That bloody thing stayed with my DS for over two years and is horrible! .

saintlyjimjams · 03/10/2012 13:10

80% of adults in the UK are affected with herpes (higher in the US- 90% there I think). I'd rather people kept their kids away from nursery with tummy bugs tbh than herpes, as you can avoid a round of tummy bugs, but you're not going to avoid herpes exposure.

Kids are going to come into contact with herpes at some stage. It happens. They may not catch it, but they will come into contact with it. Speaking as someone who has a son for whom herpes was quite possibly a life changing condition, I still say chill.

saintlyjimjams · 03/10/2012 13:11

The ONLY time I would suggest being precious about herpes is if you have a child with eczema who has not yet shown signs of a primary herpes infection (if they've had one forget being precious). In that case you might want to avoid close contact with someone with an active cold sore.

AWimbaWay · 03/10/2012 13:15

YABU!

People on here saying otherwise are obviously not coldsore sufferers. I get cold sores very easily, too much sun, if I'm run down, lack of sleep etc. If I didn't go out everytime I had one I'd be living like a recluse. I've been like this since early childhood, should I have missed out on schooling?

6 in 10 people carry the virus but most don't ever have symptoms. It can only be caught by very close contact.

I hated getting cold sores as a child, in fact I still do, not because they are uncomfortable but because other nasty people make you feel uncomfortable and like some kind of Pariah for having one.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 13:17

I don't think children should be at nursery or school with cold sores. They are horrible things. I work with small children, and if a child was sent into my nursery with a cold sore, sorry, but I won't be picking them up or cuddling them if they are upset. I have my own family to think about.

If you don't like it, don't send your child in with a cold sore.

AWimbaWay · 03/10/2012 13:22

Wow, with that attitude I wouldn't be sending my children to your nursey anyway Freddos, you sound lovely.

iliketea · 03/10/2012 13:31

Freddos - how can you guarantee that any child is 'virus-free'. Often germs spread before children show any signs or symptoms of actually being ill. Do you just hug none pf them to prevent being tainted with any viral germs? A child is crying for his / her parent having got ill at nursery, do you just let them cry without comforting until a parent arrives to collect them in order to "protect your own family"? Or is it just that a coldsore looks horrible compared to a fever and snotty nose?

sahmbles · 03/10/2012 13:32

Trouble is, the virus can be shed even when there are no active sores (and some people are more likely to shed than others).

By that rationale, should we prevent anyone who has contracted the virus (about 80% of the population) from working or having contact with small children??

ChunkyPickle · 03/10/2012 13:32

Freddos as callous as that sounds, I'm in agreement with you. DH gets coldsores and would be horrified if I or DS caught them - we are always very careful if he has an outbreak, to the extent that he keeps it covered at night just in case, and is very careful if picking up DS.

Coldsores are horrible to have, I will do whatever I can to prevent DS getting them, and I would be very upset if he was allowed to play in close contact with a child with a fresh, weeping coldsore. I think you should keep children off when the sore is weeping as that is the most infectious time.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 03/10/2012 13:32

If you have a child in nursery, you don't know that I'm not already looking after your child.

I'm good at my job and I adore the children I look after, but I don't get paid enough to risk having cold sores, and there isn't enough money in the world for me to risk passing it on to my family.

ChunkyPickle · 03/10/2012 13:33

You can't guarantee virus free, but you can do what you can to reduce the risk. Asymptomatic shedding is very rare, but weeping coldsores are very infectious. A sensible person would avoid them.

Swipe left for the next trending thread