For thinking i shouldn't be getting constantly pestered by the local nurse and GP team to get my daughter immunises when i've repeatedly told them my answer is no?

[Lowla]

My daughter is 4. She got all her jabs as a baby, but i stopped at the MMR one. Since we missed the appointment, i've been getting loads of letters to invite us to the clinic for the MMR jab and now her school booster jab for some other virus. (Hib or something like that).

I've phoned the GP and asked them not to send any more letters out as i've chosen not to get her immunised any further for my own personal reasons, and worries over her last reactions to the jabs. And now i've got some nurse calling me asking to do a home visit next week to 'check on me and dd'. I asked 'is this about the jabs?' and she said, rather reluctantly, 'yes'.

AIBU for feeling like they should respect my decision?

Sorry for the bad grammar. Writing this in a rush as i have to run and get dd from school.

Ivana, it was parents who truly believed that their children had been severely damaged by the MMR that put me off. I just couldn't take the risk when I had a good alternative. I believe my children had much better immunisation than the standard MMR programme in the end.

I did worry about travel vaccinations, but I did my research and made my decision based on the facts I had.

NOOO this topic is sooo sad .
Not only are you putting your child at risk you are putting my children and my family at risk too and millions of others at the same time.

:(

I can understand how you feel. Ds ended up in hospital with febrile seizures after every jab apart from his BCG which happens to be the only non combined jab. Some children can not take combined jabs ds when younger Obvioulsy could not. he did have his mmr at 18 months. I wish I had got singles but at the time a lot of bad press about single jabs and not all private medical care companies were offering them. He got his booster done last month (could not have singles as already had combined jab) he is nearly 5 so later than most children and was fine but he did not have it with his other booster jabs. We also live in an area now where there has been an outbreak so this swayed my decision.

Many of the children who have suffered long term effects from the mmr had febrile seizures after, these very occasionally cause brain damage. It's very difficult to prove but I believe these parents sadly dr wakefield did nothing but cause these families more distress as so many do not believe them.

Ds seizures though very frightening were not serious but it do think it is about time the nhs recognised that not all children can deal with combined jabs so parents like ourselves are not attacked by others claiming we are being hysterical or unreasonable we are not. It was not an easy decision for me but I totally understand your reasoning

I had the same, and repeatedly asked the appointments to stop. Eventually they told me about a form I could sign, to take her off the vaccinations register. I haven't had any since. Ask them about that.

In the case of treatment that affects that child only I would agree Freddos

When it comes to vaccinations, it is not that parent making a choice that affects that child; it is that parent making a choice that puts other children/elderly people/immunosuppressed people at risk.

I just can't feel comfortable with one parent making decisions that affect other people, not just their child.

They also invited me to attend an appointment with a specialist, to talk through my concerns. He ended ups saying it was obvious I'd researched the area effectively, and was happy to offer me the form to take me off the vaccination programme. They pester you because the GP's get bonuses, for reaching vaccination targets. Not because they care about your child's health.

yes i agree cakemeiamyours.
i can remember reading about the paralympics most lost limbs through meningitis.
also when i was in hospital i was suprised at how many children were in with whooping cough and menningitis cases we would not know about.

Hmm, usually any thread about vacs on MN is swiftly taken over, I'm pleased that this one still has the majority of people being pro-vacs.

Op YABU.

In my completely honest and personal opinion, the doctors are not being unreasonable in hassling you over your daughter's vaccinations, because she should be fully immunised. Thanks to the rising number of unvaccinated children, dangerous diseases like whooping cough and measles are gaining prevalence and increasing the chance of a mutation into a strain against which we have no treatment. That could cause an utterly devastating epidemic. I don't think people understand how vital herd immunity is. It goes far beyond keeping one individual child protected.

So, in my opinion, YABU on every level.

Op I have not read entire thread, this subject is always contentious, however I do think your comment re hib is naive. I suggest you fully understand all implications of what these viruses can do. An adult relative of mine died a horrible frightening death due to hib infection. His mother still cries herself to sleep ever night after many years. She wishes this immunisation had been available when he was a child.

But some parents do refuse their children life saving treatment for religious reasons or whatever, and I'm not sure whether I believe they should have the right to do that or not.

They don't. There is ample case history, and it's very clear law that a parent cannot unilaterally deny a child lifesaving treatment. Blood transfusions have been given in the face of parental refusal, and in one case a mother was forbidden to breastfeed when her belief that HIV did not cause AIDS meant she was refusing all mainstream advice on how best to prevent transmission from herself to her baby.

Your child's right to be healthy is greater than a parent's right to choose. That's legal dicta. Though as you say, immunisation is not a life-saving treatment for that specific child in all likelihood, so the point is a bit wide of the mark.

I do think most kids should get the required vaccinations to protect themselves, the wider community, and those kids who can't be vaccinated. (And the last group would include children who have siblings who've reacted very badly to a vaccination, or who have themselves reacted badly.) I do tend to be a bit aggravated by people who are almost religious on opposing vaccination, though. Deaths from measles halved in the USA inside 2 years of the vaccine first being used. That's a lot of young lives saved. And as has been mentioned, most vaccine damage is caused by febrility - and the illnesses vaccinated against all cause very high temperatures in most cases. It's an immune response, after all.

Vaccines harm very few, and diseases very many. That's no consolation if your child is in the former group, any more than the reverse is. But I personally think anyone refusing to vaccinate should have the opportunity to talk to an immunologist on the phone or via email, instead of being patronised by a nurse/GP. It might increase vaccination rates, and also identify more clearly where there is a genuine reason not to. And I think vaccination rates would rise, too.

Nannyogg Yes. I was told categorically by Dr, Nurse, HV and various scientifically literate friends that if DS had been exposed to any of the diseases rather than the vaccine he would have died.
AND reading up on it I believe them.

Prevention is ALWAYS better than cure.
Only in the molly coddled west could we EVER have forgotten that fact.

think of all the tiny babies 0 day old to 15 months before their parents can have them covered (vaccinated)
its so sad many people are putting these at risk.

also people coming into the country my not be vaccinated and as far as i know there are no health checks either.

Speaking as someone who had to watch her DS suffering terribly with whopping cough earlier this year and miss a whole term of school (and he WAS vaccinated at all the right times, but the vaccine protection against whooping cough wears out at about 8 or 9 and currently there is no further jab in the programme - because herd immunity is supposed to protect the older kids) YABVVVVVU. We have a whooping cough epidemic now that has killed several babies. The per school vaccination is an important part of everyone's protection against whooping cough, not just your child's. You are being unreasonable, selfish and stupid.

bethjoanne is right IMO. Ten babies have died recently from whooping cough, because they were too small to be vaccinated. Pregnant women are now to be vaccinated in hopes that will offer their babies some additional protection in those vulnerable first weeks.

MordionAgenos, x post.

Incidentally I had whooping cough in early spring myself. I have never felt so terrible - was like the worst flu, lasted two months, and the only upside was the husky voice. DH commented that he forgot what I'd sounded like before for a while! All joking aside, if it felt that appalling in my 30s, what must it be like for a little 'un?

Oh, and DS did not get it.

I felt pretty good about my decision to vaccinate then.

"Should doctors respect people's decision to smoke? Or to get obese?"

Yes of course. They can mention it but not keep going on about it or turn up at your house! Hopefully the nanny state hasn't gone that far yet...

My comment will get lost in these 11 pages no doubt but here is my tuppence worth...You're being unreasonable not to get your daughter immunised in my opinion BUT at the end of the day you are the parent so they (GP and nurse) should not resort to harrassing you to get you to immunise. As others have said, they will have (what they believe) to be the best interests at heart though so you can't really blame them for being to persistent.

Mydogsleepsonthebed

I'm not ignoring you? Someone answered for me, like, back on p1, and I clarified on p3 or something.

If you can't have your DC immunised, you better bloody hope that as many people as possible DO immunise to reduce the chance of your DC coming into contact with mumps or polio or whatever.

So you should be especially angry at people choosing not to vaccinate their DCs.

youmaylogout
but then obesity tends not to kill other people's babies - which contagious diseases can do.

"Should doctors respect people's decision to smoke? Or to get obese?

Yes of course. They can mention it but not keep going on about it or turn up at your house! Hopefully the nanny state hasn't gone that far yet...

Absolutely; but that's the wrong question. Would you think it inappropriate for the nanny state to keep going on about it or to turn up at your house if you gave your child cigarettes, or a diet that made them obese?

It isn't yourself you are refusing vaccinations for.

perfectstorm - Great post btw.

@perfect DS is 12 (he had his 12th birthday during his 12 week illness ) and he was dreadful. The middle week it ws genuinely frightening (you start the real whooping/vomiting after the first couple of weeks). He developed the ability to sleep through a fit - fine for him, terrifying for us since he was vomiting several times a night in his sleep so I had to sleep beside him on the floor to grab him and try and wake him and hold him over a bucket. He was physically shattered all the time and it was just awful.

He is fine now though, which is good - but smaller children can't cope in the same way. :(

One of the problems with WC is that not everyone succumbs to the worst form of the disease - people can contract it and carry it and not whoop themselves.

I have nothing but contempt for vaccine refusers, to be honest.

perfectstorm Yes, that is put much better than I managed it!