To be deeply puzzled by competitive anti- feminism.......

[seeker]

"I'm not a feminist"

"oh, I'm so much less of a feminist than you are"

"I'm so not a femynyst I don't even know how to spell it"

I don't know boffy. Can you?

And the way people expressed themselves caused you no concern at all?

But they are wrong.

Pretty much everyone on here who has said "I'm not a feminist" has then followed it up by saying "but I agree in equality"...well that makes you a feminist then. It's a catch all term for people who believe in an equality of the sexes - which I'd say was pretty much ALL women, unless they think that men should rule them. (And I WOULD say those people were dim)

This thread for example

COMPETITIVE ANTI FEMINISM

Is it real? No
Any evidence? No
The people asking for examples? Ignored

This thread is a load of shot designed to start this very fight again and tell women that they are wrong and their feeling shouldn't matter or are stupid

The not being able to spell feminist in the op is a sly little dig.

It's annoying and people do not like annoying so fight back against it.

There is no acknowledgement of why others think that.
On the 'young girls thread' someone said its common were I live and were shot down with 'oh the whole regional issue ' ie implying it was a lie or stupid excuse

It's not. Where I live lad and lass are v common but it's overlooked as insignificant even though in the context f the thread it is entirely relevant

Well then that's your black and white.

I said I am a feminist, others refer to themselves as equalists, others think 'fuck that they don't care about women like me or my opinion if it doesn't fit in so I don't want to be associated with them'

And the way people expressed themselves caused you no concern at all?

If you are referring to the fact that you felt personally attacked on that thread, then I obviously percieved the thread differently to the way you did, because I didn't feel that they were attacking you, I felt that they were arguing that they found your views offensive.

Er, seeker has also asked for examples of "bile" being posted and has been told to look on Threads I'm On.

Sauce for the goose and all that.

It's not "black and white" thinking it's terminology.

Feminism is defined as: "the doctrine advocating social, political, and all other rights of women equal to those of men."

So unless someone disagrees with that basic construct then they agree with feminism. I'm not sure why what I am saying is bothering you so much Kayano. I'm not calling you a thciko or a bitch or a twat, I'm merely saying that people who belive in equality of the sexes are feminists/

I actually though my thread title and opening post was mildly amusing. Apologies to people who didn't.

Cakeismysaviour- if you saw how I was addressed on "that" thread as measured and thoughtful disagreement with my OP then you live on a very very different planet to the one I live on!

Pretty much everyone on here who has said "I'm not a feminist" has then followed it up by saying "but I agree in equality"...well that makes you a feminist then

Try starting a thread on FWR saying you're pro porn, you shave your pubic hair and armpits because you think it's disgusting, you live off your DH's income, you only buy pink Lego for your DD...but you believe in equality therefore you are a feminist

I have a feeling not all would agree with you.

We must remember, there might be some feminists who are twats, but there are also twats who are not feminists (I feel the need for some kind of diagram with the two circles and an overlapping bit).

I'm merely saying that people who belive in equality of the sexes are feminists

I think ( as has already been said ) the point is that many now distance themselves from that label on MN as a minority give it such a bad rep on MN with radical views.

Pretty sad state of affairs.

In that case every man I know is also a feminist, so why do you think it is right that they shouldn't attend feminist meetings then Shirty

But we're not on FWR are we? We're in AIBU so what's the beef?

I don't post on FWR very often, not because I'm not feminist enough or because I feel unwelcome (and as I said I do shave and wax and I've NEVER been told I'm not feminist enough).

The FWR boards are to discuss issues surround feminism, so talking about why Lego have made pink lego to appeal to little girls is just that, a discussion. I am very weirded out that people find that so threatening.

If you like pink lego and are pro porn and all those things then that's up to you and you are welcome to put your points across in whichever way you choose (as long as you don't break the guidelines) if someone tells you you're not a feminist then that is THEIR opinion, they are as free to voice it as you are.

Twisting all that up into ALL MN FEMINISTS ARE XYZ is just lazy and shit really.

So you distance yourselves for a worldwide movement that has improved and is improving the lives of women immeasurably because somebody on mumsnet said something disobliging about armpit hair? Really?

Thats your opinion seeker and I don't agree.

missymoomoomee Because they would be the ones talking, mansplaining, not listening and taking charge.

At least I think that's what some people would say. But on the other hand, some meetings could offer a safe place for women to speak about stuff without men being around.

Do you think that women would be welcome at a "male rights" meeting missy?

That was the point I was making.

I think if you're going to judge all women on MN by a few posts you have seen that appeared competitive over anti-feminism you can hardly complain when all feminists are lumped together. There may well be some women who are truly anti feminist and proud of it (I've not seen any myself, but I just tend to meander between here, FWR and chat)

There are some feminists I wouldn't give the time of day to, ditto for some other posters who are never on FWR. A few bad apples in any group doesn't mean the entire group is wrong/stupid/letting the sisterhood down.

What I am not enjoying recently is what feels like baiting threads, this one for example. You'll bring out the extremes in both groups, a massive bunfight ensures, point of? "Of course they were made up- and exagerrated for effect." Really, how does that help anyone here?

Can I just shout out to EatsBrains if she's here, she started some good threads in FWR recently, kind of a beginners guide to the FWR board for those who fancy dipping a toe in.

Is there such a thing as a 'male rights' meeting? If there was I'm sure that feminists would be the first ones up in arms if they weren't allowed to attend.

So you think everything that was said to me was justified and reasonable, cims? Really?

There are lots of Men's Rights activists on the internet missy. They're the ones who always want to talk about how terribly feminism is impacting on the men.

So, yeah, I'm sure they have meetings and I'm pretty sure women wouldn't be welcome!

why do people always bring up pink?
my dd loves pink, she is a teen and she and a lot of her friends love it.
yet for some reason mn thinks it is evil

Well you might prove me wrong but I just think what I think and it's my right and you're just a nasty and say bile and I'm going to report you so ner.

It's a winning argument!

"What I am not enjoying recently is what feels like baiting threads, this one for example. You'll bring out the extremes in both groups, a massive bunfight ensures, point of? "Of course they were made up- and exagerrated for effect." Really, how does that help anyone here? "

I'm sorry- I really didn't think anyone would think they were genuine quotations. I though I was being mildly funny.