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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be angry that the Chief Constable chose the words..

999 replies

seeker · 19/09/2012 09:20

"gentle" and "a chatterbox" respectively to describe the two women police officers who were murdered on duty yesterday.

Can you imagine those words ever being used to describe a man?

OP posts:
thebestisyettocome · 19/09/2012 11:28

Mumsnet hits a new low.

Seeker. The best thing I can say about you is that you have no judgement whatsoever.

iknowwho · 19/09/2012 11:29

Come on LadyBeagle we are out of here!!

Birdsgottafly · 19/09/2012 11:29

I was just about to take the same quote as Easy, this is what else was said.

Paying tribute to Bone and Hughes, he said they were "two very brave and courageous colleagues who exemplified the very best of British policing".

Bone, he said, was a "calm, gentle woman" and "excellent bobby" who had been in the midst of planning her wedding

WTF is the problem?

LadyBeagleEyes · 19/09/2012 11:29

I'm gone Grin

Purple2012 · 19/09/2012 11:30

Think I will bow out and hide the thread too. Seeker - if you can't see how jumping on the feminist bandwagon is offensive to these 2 women then there is something wrong with you.

WorraLiberty · 19/09/2012 11:30

Easy the OP seems to be refusing to acknowledge the Chief Constable was quoting her colleagues, despite it being repeatedly pointed out to her.

pigletmania · 19/09/2012 11:30

I agree with you Jodie. Those I hope are the attributes I describe my self chatterbox. I am in my mid 30s I wold love being described as a young girl Grin fgs the man was probably using words described by the officers family. They are not only officers, but someone's chid, cousin, friend. That does not matter, two police Officers lost their lives and the op comes out with the most irrelevant comment

Birdsgottafly · 19/09/2012 11:31

Taken from easy's link

"Her colleagues said: "She was a chatterbox and was always smiling, even after a night shift when everyone else was a bit grumpy. "

It would be helpful seeker if you didn't misquote what was said.

TheBigJessie · 19/09/2012 11:32

I'm a feminist. I think this thread is horrid.

Two women were murdered yesterday, and you are criticising the words of their grieving friends less than 24 hours later.

Maybe the descriptions do reflect our sexist society. But is attacking the word choices of some bereaved, shocked people going to improve our world?

I don't think it is. Argue about gender assigned adjectives in contexts when the people speaking aren't freshly bereaved or quoting those who are.

Sallyingforth · 19/09/2012 11:34

This thread doesn't do credit either to the two police officers who died, or to the poster who started it. I think the OP should ask for it to be removed.

JodieHarsh · 19/09/2012 11:34

Seeker

(Brief derail alert)

I would like to apologise openly for having given the impression that you do nothing but post offensive threads. This is clearly not the case, and it is wrong to suggest that it is: even if I personally have been deeply offended and angered by you on more than one occasion that is my experience, and I shouldn't extend it to everyone else, or invite everyone else to share it.

I think it's fairly clear why I lost my temper on this thread in particular, and I maintain that it is astonishingly offensive, but it is bad form to bring a previous opinion on a poster into it, and for that I am sorry.

Sorry for derail. Now going away as I can contribute nothing to this.

bubalou · 19/09/2012 11:35

Perfect examples of why I do not call myself a feminist.

If someone comes up with a new word for it for people who are obviously like minded such as iknowwho, LadyBeagleEyes and JodieHarsh then I will gladly call myself one.

Whilst idiotic people like Seeker are still calling themselves feminists and spouting shit like this I will be calling myself nothing of the sort.

thebestisyettocome · 19/09/2012 11:36

What is also very odd is saying men are never described as 'gentle.'

CogitoErgoSometimes · 19/09/2012 11:38

YABU... Would you have preferred 'loquacious' to chatterbox or are you objecting to any reference to their personality? When other officers have died in the past, there's always the same mix in the official statement of them being a brave respected officer and a 'nice bloke' or something a bit more personal.

I actually think it's very important these days that we, the public, don't see police officers as faceless automatons in blue uniforms. There's been a lot of bad press around various police-related scandals recently and some ignoramuses are quite happy to use this as an excuse to dehumanise officers, calling them horrible names etc. So knowing those brave young women were chatty or gentle as well as professional and efficient brings it home that officers are regular individuals, just like the rest of us.

complexnumber · 19/09/2012 11:38

Seeker, the BBC news website does not attribute that quote to the Chief Constable.

It says "Her colleagues said: "She was a chatterbox and was always smiling, even after a night shift when everyone else was a bit grumpy." "

But this has been pointed out to you several times, so I doubt if there is any chance of you retracting.

WorraLiberty · 19/09/2012 11:39

I think the word 'Equalist' was a goodun as someone suggested on a thread the other day.

I'm all for any word that doesn't lump me in with joyless, permanently offended, heavy handed idiots.

bubalou · 19/09/2012 11:40

I like that Worral - Equalist it is.

Smile
TheBigJessie · 19/09/2012 11:42

Yes. Everyone needs to understand that they were people. Not just naice gender-aware MNers, but everyone. Including the class of bastard that would otherwise dehumanise them.

And they were young! They had their whole lives ahead of them.

WorraLiberty · 19/09/2012 11:42

I now have a vision of Edward Woodward in my head Grin

Sallyingforth · 19/09/2012 11:43

bubalou
I'm not a feminist either. I'm an equalist. Men and women are different but have equal value.
Since this thread is already sinking under its own weight of dross, I would like to add that I'm rather unhappy about the media concentration on the sex of the two victims. They were police officers doing their job.

Tuttutitlookslikerain · 19/09/2012 11:43

Very, very well said Jodie

Sallyingforth · 19/09/2012 11:44

x post with comments above.

thebestisyettocome · 19/09/2012 11:45

The PC's sex is relevent because this is the first time two female officers have been murdered at the same time.

MadgeHarvey · 19/09/2012 11:46

Well done seeker - big fail at recruiting to your cause today! Your opinions are misplaced and your lack of understanding is a wonder to behold.

TheBigJessie · 19/09/2012 11:46

"A lot has been made of the fact in parts of the media that these were two relatively young women police officers," said Derek Barnett, president of the Police Superintendents Association. "My view is that they were first and foremost police officers and their gender is no more relevant than if they were two male officers.

"They all share the same level of risk. They were murdered not because they were women but because they were police officers."