To be angry that the Chief Constable chose the words..

[seeker]

"gentle" and "a chatterbox" respectively to describe the two women police officers who were murdered on duty yesterday.

Can you imagine those words ever being used to describe a man?

"I think it demonstrated tremendous strength of will from her friends and family that they'd given him any quotes at all."

Absolutely. And it was his responsibility, or that of his people, to choose carefully which quotation should be used in which context.

Hully unfortunately for you, someone quoted official reports of two recently dead male young soldiers. Their families did use the word bubbly. Soz.

Chatterbox too.

Seeker, there have already been posters on this thread who are connected to these women, they have found your comments to be insensitive.

one thing has nothing to do with another, Sallying

But I have had my fair share of unspeakable gruesomeness, yes.

"Hully unfortunately for you, someone quoted official reports of two recently dead male young soldiers. Their families did use the word bubbly. "

Their familiesdid. The Prime Minister didn't when he made his statements in the House of Commons.

Jessie - ah, haven't read the thread.

well that is fair enough and mighty unusual.

Fucking hell seeker. Seriously. Is this some kind of parody? I have often been told that I never know when to shut up, they need to read your posts on this thread!!

I think this is a case of when in a hole, stop digging.

Sorry I don't accept that you know there would have been other words.

Even if there had been, you do not know that they would have been more "appropriate" in your eyes

For god's sake, no-one's going and picking up floral tributes and saying 'that's sexist and inappropriate'! The fact is this story has been reported in some very odd terms. The debate to be had is about the media and about language, not about whether or not this story is tragic.

"One word.

Bubbly.

Ever hear a man called bubbly?"

Yep. I did about three links earlier in the thread re. soldiers killed in action and they were all referred to as bubbly/friendly/happy.

And so what? Some terms are deemed feminine, some are masculine. I know we're arguing the feminist toss here but there are male/female equivalents of some terms of endearment. Bubbly becomes fun-loving. Chatterbox becomes life and soul or larger than life. Girl becomes lad.

The debate to be had is about the media and about language

Agree, but when the words used are those of loved ones, people need to take a step back and think.

No one I repeatno one has the right to challenge the words used by bereaved people to describe the loved ones they have lost.
I hope this thread never comes to the notice of the friends and family of the two officers, but if you do see it I hope you will notice that it's only the feeling of a heartless minority with a private agenda.

And what did Hully say, seeker? She asked if a man had ever been called bubbly. She didn't add your proviso.

And she then was very graceful about the correction.

And they weren't terms doled out by just family (in my links) There was a headteacher using them in one a Lieutenant in another.

Fucksake why are you arguing.

Do you think their mothers are worrying about their daughters being called bubbly or funloving?

It was said in an endearing manner.

I have read half the thread, I'm not reading the second half because it's mad.

1. Two police officers (who happened to be female) got killed whilst on duty. Terrible.

1. Those police officers were described in unprofessional terms as "young girls" etc which demeans them and their professionalism and speaks volumes about attitudes to professional women. Terrible.

And yes IT MATTERS. It always matters because all the small things go to make up the big thing which is the unequal way women are treated in thsi society. And if you don't think that's true, you clearly live in La La Land.

no what matters is..
2 women were murdered,
they have left families and friends that will be grieving.

so no the warm words used to describe them are not what matters.

But I have had my fair share of unspeakable gruesomeness, yes

Then I hope gully that no one chose to criticise the way you dealt with it in a public forum.

The thing is Sallying, it isn't the friends and families being criticised it is the professional superior of two professional officers.

And no, I didn't mind, I can separate out the different strands around incidents.

More than one thing can matter at once threeOrange

Life is complex

There is a time and a place. I would rather live in La La Land than think it's ok to have a pop at how a bereaved person wishes to describe a loved one.

And before anyone screams "No one has done that"

Yes they have!!

This thread is making me want to smash my laptop into a million bits so I am bowing out now. You'll never convince some people that they're WRONG.

What Hully said.