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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask how you broke the news you were pregnant to your parents

102 replies

bigears22 · 18/09/2012 18:46

I was wondering/being nosy. How you broke the news to your parents/in laws that you were having a baby. How did they take it if they had no idea you were trying to conceive.

I myself have no story, I'm still TTC but dreading the day I tell my parents (if it ever comes) despite them being lovely- still chicken.

OP posts:

JeezyOrangePips · 18/09/2012 19:39

I burst into tears at the dinner table. It was unplanned.

I wouldn't change it though! She is a wonderful person that I am blessed to have as my daughter.

StaceymReadyForNumber3 · 18/09/2012 19:40

For dd I got my mum alone and told her I wasn't returning to school to do my a levels. She told me I had to. I told her I couldn't as I was pregnant. She told me I wasn't lol

I was 17 and on a gap year to sort my head out so I think it was a major shock for her!

With ds I can't remember tbh.

With dc3 I phoned and said 'you might be having a new grandchild' (I was in shock after 14 months ttc)

With mil we bought a photo frame which said 'coming soon' under the picture and put in our first scan pic. She thought it was a long awaited wedding pic (we got married in feb). She was shocked to say the least!

FrenchRuby · 18/09/2012 19:42

We had just moved into our own place and we went back to MILs and said we've got some news and she said 'Oh, has noodles died?' (our lizard) and DH just blurted out 'No of course not, why would we come round here to tell you noodles died? frenchruby is pregnant' Then looked a bit gutted because he hadn't planned on blurting it out like that, still makes me laugh now haha.
I don't talk to my mother so that one was easy.

DizzyKipper · 18/09/2012 19:43

I was meant to meet up with my mum after work the next day, but the night before had to go to A&E due to severe pain on my right side. They admitted me since they were afraid it was ectopic so I asked DH to let her know we wouldn't be meeting and why. He tried ringing her but couldn't get through so in the end had to leave a text message (don't think she was too pleased about this but DH at the time was quite preoccupied over fears that both I and the baby might die, so I think he can be forgiven). She found out when I was 5 weeks.

DH wanted it to be special when he let his parents know, we had our 12 week scan a few weeks before Christmas so as a Christmas present they both got a lovely picture frame with the scan in.

Treats · 18/09/2012 19:44

I told my sister first - about a week before my parents - because we knew that she and my BIL were also TTC and thought she would like to have the advance warning.

We arranged to drop in at my parents "for coffee" the following Sunday when we were travelling down to see my DH's parents for lunch (spookily arranged weeks before we knew we'd have something to tell them) so told both our parents on the same day. Both were thrilled.

My mother was then a bit overwhelmed to get a call from my sister later that evening to say that she too had just done a pregnancy test .........which was positive!

I remember someone asking me some weeks later if my baby would be my parents first grandchild, to which I had to say "I don't know" since mine and my sister's due dates were only 3 days apart! They must have thought I was from such a dysfunctional family.......

39widow · 18/09/2012 19:46

i just told them over the phone i having another one

my dh was the best when i burst into tears and said i'll have to give up zumba and when he asked why i said cos u cant do zumba when ur pregnant. think he was shocked

FoofyShmooffer · 18/09/2012 19:49

I took the test while DH and my Dad were doing the Sunday morning dig walk. Met them at the door all excited. After a bit Dad went home.
My Mum at this point was still in bed.
Dad "Foofy did a pg test"
Mum " right"
Dad "it was negative"
Mum " right"
Dad (puzzled at the lack of cheering and whooping)
"Righto then" leaves the room.
30 seconds later - "bloody hell! Positive I meant positive!"

Mum

HSMM · 18/09/2012 19:49

DH and I had given up trying (or using contraception) after 2 yrs of nothing happening, so when I told my Mum and Dad, they were really shocked and also VERY pleased. They were not expecting it at all, under the circumstances.

DH was more shocked than them ... and I think I was most shocked of all!

KitCat26 · 18/09/2012 19:50

DD1 Mum said 'Are you ok', I just gave her a look and she guess straight away. I was only 4wks. I swore her to secrecy though as my dad is an old gossip! (Apparently, he guessed around christmas time when I was 8wks. Pretty sure mum just told him though.)

DD2 I told mum over the phone at about 8 weeks. She was really shocked as DD1 was only 9mths. I told her we'd been TTC for a while, she was even more

We told DMIL both times with the scan picture.

EvilTwins · 18/09/2012 19:51

My mum guessed. We were at a family do for Dad's 60th in a hotel. DH and I arrived last and mum offered me a glass of wine. I turned her down so she whisked me off to a corner and asked me outright. I wasn't intending to tell because A) I didn't want the weekend to be about me, and B) my cousin was there and she had had a fairly recent miscarriage. Also I was very early on in the pregnancy. Still, by the end of the weekend everyone had twigged because I didn't drink and was very sick both mornings. When I had the 12 week scan and found out it was twins, I called my parents to tell them and my dad thought I was joking. He actually didn't believe me. Humph.

wildpoppy · 18/09/2012 19:52

I said what are you doing for Xmas. It was April so it took a while for them to work out why. My mum howled like a wild animal with utter joy - we were a month off starting fertility treatment that they were going to help fund so they knew we were ttc.

This baby also due week before Christmas so again in April we asked what they were doing for Christmas. They got it right away this time!

Overreactionoftheweek · 18/09/2012 19:54

I found out on Valentine's Day so called my mum saying " guess what dh got me!"

It was a huge relief for them, because a few weeks earlier my little sister had announced her pregnancy...and I cried my heart out because we'd been ttc for so long - my niece turns 1 next week, and ds is 1 at the end of October, I love that they're so close in age.

Kaloobear · 18/09/2012 19:56

My DM asked me on the phone how the diet was going and I said 'I've stopped, I can't diet while I'm pregnant'

DMIL was very ill in hospital and we'd already miscarried once so didn't want to tell her early in case anything went wrong. When we had had the 12 week scan DH took the picture to hospital and got DFIL along too-he said 'I've got something to show you both' and put the picture on the table. Both DMIL and DFIL paused, took out their glasses cases, put on their glasses and then said 'Bloody hell, that's a baby!' DMIL didn't live to see her granddaughter, our DD, so I'm glad she for to see the scan picture at least. DD is named for her.

TheWalkingDead · 18/09/2012 19:57

DH and I were on out belated honeymoon, and I came down with a terrible cold the day we left. I ended up, after 7 days of agony, seeing the ship's doctor (on a cruise in the Mediterranean) who gave me antibiotics but checked for pg as I hadn't had a period for a while. I thought I was just late due to medication I had been taking, but no I was pregnant.

We called my parents first and I said "Well, ummm....it turns out I'm pregnant." I got a stony silence and my mum said "Oh no....what are you going to do?" in a worried voice as I have a non serious chronic health problem and she worried about my ability to cope. It was a big downer tbh and I dreaded going back to see them as subsequent phonecalls were in the same sort of vein. Got a lovely reaction from the lady I sat next to on the plane - she cried and was so happy for us!

DH's dad was happy, as was my DB and DH's DB. My parents were fine once I got home a week later and they had a much happier reaction when I told them I was pregnant with DS2 a year and a hlaf later.

Socknickingpixie · 18/09/2012 20:02

first dc, i took the dog for a 6 mile walk and phoned from a phone box because i figured by the time i got back mum would have calmed down - she didnt that took 4 years. with my dad i said over dinner in quicktalk "pass the salt ohbythewayimpregnant no the salt" it took 2 hours for him to suss what i ment.

but yep that was another 17yo. all my others just phoned and nobody got cross,gutted as thats when i figured out i was a grown up

Noqontrol · 18/09/2012 20:04

First time I just said 'do you want to see my scan pictures' and got them out my bag.
Second time, as ds was due at Christmas, I got a handmade early christmas card, put a scan picture in it, and printed the due date in the card.

WilsonFrickett · 18/09/2012 20:06

Slight diversion, but I remember telling my much older boss and blushing bright red, because all I could think was 'oh no, now he knows I have sex!!'

Outofnappies · 18/09/2012 20:14

I'm just wondering OP why you are dreading telling your parents...I really hope that when the time comes,as i'm sure it will, that it will be one of the happiest days of your life, and theirs :-)

discrete · 18/09/2012 20:26

I told my Mum on the phone: We're expecting a baby

My mum's response: From where?

Me: The usual place....

We had been told we would be unable to have children.

With PIL, we were at theirs for dinner. DH said: We have something to tell you.

MIL: You're not getting divorced are you?

DH: No, of course not. What is the usual other thing married couples do?

MIL: You've got me stumped.

I love all their faith in medical diagnostics....

Moominsarescary · 18/09/2012 20:27

Ds1 followed her around crying until she guessed
Ds2 on the phone
Ds3 in person one night as they were trying to shove wine at me
Ds4 showed her a scan pick of his penis at 17 weeks, she was shocked as ds3 was only 24 weeks old
Ds5 I'm 19 weeks tomorrow and haven't told her yet

catgirl1976 · 18/09/2012 20:29

I waited till Mothers Day

Then I handed my mum a card

On the front it said:

"We wanted to get you something really special for Mothers Day.

We searched and searched but we couldn't find anything special enough.

So this year, we are making you something instead."

Then inside it said.................

"A Grandma"

cue many tears :)

WillYouDoTheFandango · 18/09/2012 20:32

Outofnappies I dreaded telling mine (currently 26 weeks with DC1) despite being 28, living with DP of 8 years and both with good jobs!

It took me 45 minutes of opening and closing my mouth and nothing coming out! DP repeatedly poked me and mouthed go on!

My mum was thrilled and immediately got out the knitting patterns. She told my dad who was out and he rang to say "Well done". When it was pointed out that this was a weird thing to say he said "Well I dodn't even know you were doing it!" Mortified!

Original poster

bigears22 · 18/09/2012 20:33

Enjoying reading these :) I just have a horrible feeling my mum will do something similar to an earlier mnetter, be a bit flat and 'so what are you going to do' which would crush me. I'm probably being harsh on her but have a feeling.

OP posts:

Original poster

bigears22 · 18/09/2012 20:34

Also never speak about sex!

OP posts:

Outofnappies · 18/09/2012 20:37

Ahhh fandango lovely story. I am loving these posts, our parents and PIL can be so hilarious sometimes...!

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