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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to take my baby on public transport?

202 replies

ETUMP · 18/09/2012 17:17

Just returned from a trip to London with my 3 month old baby. Very busy train on the return journey with a lot of luggage so there wasn't room for my pram (quinny with basinet) in the luggage area as i'd politely hung back to allow others to get on in front.

I put it in the next carriage, as advised by a staff member and then a manager asked (very loudly) whose pram was parked next door and it couldn't stay there etc. He was obviously harrassed, but was quite rude and sarcastic to me. After a very publuc discussion he said 'well these trains are not made for prams really'.

If that's the case - why sell family railcards?

OP posts:
BlazerOfGlory · 18/09/2012 22:22

Rucksack, lightweight buggy, hold toddlers hand. Don't carry potties and umbrellas around. Its not that hard, really.
Quite a lot of pfb-ness going on here. You rarely hear parents of several small children complaining in this way, and we use public transport too!

Goldenbear · 18/09/2012 22:42

No PFB sentiments here, I have 2 children, the eldest is 5. No complaints either just arguing in support of the OP and am gobsmacked that so many mums are critical of a mum with a very young baby. Perhaps people could be a bit more helpful in these scenarios than judgemental.

ATourchOfInsanity · 18/09/2012 22:52

One thing I think mothers of older babies seem to forget quickly is how little sleep mothers with young babies are surviving on. My dd was great until 4 months when she began teething but we went through a good 4 months of waking every 3 hours if not more. It is hard to focus and stay calm or happy in these situations with public transport when your body feels as though it needs a week or R&R let alone having to hold and fold and carry nappy bags. I don't want to bang on about being a single mum, but by 13 months with precisely 2 lie ins (one real one and one of an extra hour) which a lot of people don't seem to really 'get'. It just seems sad that people can't empathise a little more with new mum's who don't know all of the tricks or haven't had enough sleep or time to get better aclimatised to motherhood. My dd is now sleeping through most nights, but up at 5:30am every morning and only now do I feel I can get enough sleep to write on MN again at this time of the night! Sorry for long post. Off to bed now but just did a bit of a mental time travel and thought it was worth adding...

LineRunner · 18/09/2012 22:59

The first time I tried to leave the house with DC1 and the pram-thing-buggy I fucking wept, because the pram-thing-buggy and the tiredness and everything was just so shit.

JamieandTheMagicTorch · 19/09/2012 06:34

I gave sympathy. And advice.

booomy · 19/09/2012 07:47

I book a london train a few weeks in advance when visiting family, you can go first class for a fiver more! Especially after 7:30pm. Its £250 more expensive on the day.

Virgin trains have loads of soace in first class for prams and big seat, free wifi and ds can run round the first class lounge while i eat free biscuits Grin

CatsRule · 19/09/2012 08:34

Yanbu

A buzz wouldn't take up much more space than a large suitcase. If you were to fold the chassis and carry the carrycot would you have got a seat?...Would you take up less floor space holding the carrycot?...I doubt it and very much doubt anyone would offer you a seat.

I have been amazed at the ignorance since having my baby. I've carried my pram on and off buses where the driver rudely wouldn't...and could of...parked closer to the kerb and all the while been watched by able bodied people who just stare. They are not obliged to offer help but I would of. I've also had many a door shut on me and my pram by people with no manners...pram or no pram I would always see if someone was behind me before letting go of a door too.

Yes it is not other peoples problem we have prams but there is no need to be rude to those with prams. These are my experiences with public transport and public places....it hasn't encouraged me to leave the car at home!

After my rant op I believe yanbu!

Thingiebob · 19/09/2012 08:46

Linerunner - so did I. In fact, I think I shouted a bit as well.

nickeldaisical · 19/09/2012 10:17

WorraLiberty Tue 18-Sep-12 17:44:24

"The OP hasn't given a single example yet of how the man was rude to her"

it's in the OP:

"then a manager asked (very loudly) whose pram was parked next door and it couldn't stay there etc. He was obviously harrassed, but was quite rude and sarcastic to me. After a very publuc discussion he said 'well these trains are not made for prams really'."

MrDobalina · 19/09/2012 10:28

nickel the guard would have to ask loudly, he was addressing the whole carriage Confused

in the same way of course, the discussion was public...hes not going to usher her into the toilet cubicle is he

I dont see anything rude about what the guard said Confused

nickeldaisical · 19/09/2012 10:30

i copied that bit in because i was highlighting that it was the manager, not because of the loudly bit.
she said he was rude and sarcastic to her.

whether he actually was doesn't really matter: if she perceived him to be then he's the one making the offence.

MrDobalina · 19/09/2012 10:42

I read it, as that being OPs description of how he was rude/sarcastic to her....in which case i dispute that it was rude

Wheresmypopcorn · 19/09/2012 13:45

Baby slings aren't an option for everyone. OP, only 2 people were rude to you the whole journey. What about all the others who weren't? (being glass half full here I know)

StrawberryMonkey · 19/09/2012 22:33

Ps not that anyone cares...I had told my 8y old a few of the comments she does not read MN! (far to busy reading the Hobbit herself).

I think she's a very wise 8y old. ;-)

Pumpster · 19/09/2012 22:39

Yanbu, people take bikes on the train ffs!

BlazerOfGlory · 19/09/2012 22:43

But you are only allowed take bikes on the train at certain times and in certain places. Its not an automatic right.

MrDobalina · 19/09/2012 22:45

there are carriages for bikes; you have to book them on

5madthings · 19/09/2012 22:46

The trains i go on often have a number if bikes. Sometimes tipped up on one back wheel and balanced precariously in that bit inbetween carriages!

Are there rules on.bikes on trains?

5madthings · 19/09/2012 22:47

Well they arenr always used! Maybe it depends on the train company?

Pumpster · 19/09/2012 22:48

The trains I get to London have bikes in every carriage.

MrDobalina · 19/09/2012 22:54

oh ok--im not in london...you cant take bikes on trains here, without booking them on..and then they get put in a carriage with no seat/like freight...

cerealqueen · 19/09/2012 22:56

I have a quinny, live in London and would avoid at all costs getting on any form of transport at rush hour, its just not fair to other travellers having it take up so much space. YABU.

tethersend · 19/09/2012 23:00

Not only do I live in London and regularly travel on trains/tubes, I have a 3yo and a baby and a Cameleon which I NEVER fold.

Sometimes I take my baby out and leave the empty pram UNFOLDED.

In addition to this, I have taught my 3 yo to tell commuters to fuck off and my baby to flick 'v's at them whilst being sick on their shoes.

Do I win £5?

tethersend · 19/09/2012 23:01

And if I'm really feeling like a cunt, I have a 1970s Silver Cross coachbuilt pram with which to make everyone's life a misery.

Pumpster · 19/09/2012 23:07

With a buggy board attached? Grin