to think my friend is being very very silly

[Fishwife1949]

right my friend has not work in 6 years and has a 5 year old (don't want to debate the rights and wrongs of her not working)

she is now being required to find a job, she has said she is is only willing to work term time because of the children which is fair enough i guess but the thing i find vexing is the fact she is not willing to work in any school out of her local area (confused)

there is a opening at my child's school for a dinner lady but i live in the next LA TO HER BUT ITS ONLY 3.9 MILES AWAY on one direct bus #
she says she needs to be local in case her child takes ill but i fear the job center its losing patience with her and her money will be stopped if she carries on being so inflexible

she has no qualifications and were in tough times so i don't fell she can be to picky i think if she passes this up she is crazy

what can i do to convince her

i fear she thinks things are as they were when you can refuse work and i think its allot better she gets a job that suits her then them getting fed up giving her something or just stopping her money

i have also asked her to find out how long she has to look before the money will stop and she wont ask

i am worried because i love her dearly

And yes your friend is being very very very silly.
She won't get it it will go to a friend of a friend, good school jobs do.
But applying would show willing to the benefits people.

It is under 4 miles so at a push she would be able to walk it in under an hour or buy a bike and cycle in about 10 minutes.
The job centre wouldn't be impressed if you refused to go for a job 4 miles away because you didn't want to travel so far and if she continues to be so fussy she may find the job centre will be making her apply for jobs alot further away.

Fishwife1949,

My neice is in a similar position as your friend. She knows fine well that she needs to start work, but she has absolutely no confidence, barely leaves the house, has no quals and no 'get up and go'.

I am very worried about her, but what can you do? She needs to help herself, it's not like you can force her to go to work. Maybe a serious chat with her and try to find out what the issues are?

But TBH, if she wont try, you will have to let her 'fail' and be there to pick up the pieces when she needs you.

Best of luck.

Ahhh, but I think MN is for me LtEve.

Maybe it is not for you and you should try somewhere more heavily moderated like the nethuns eh? See you around eh ?

I am definitely going now.

I really need to stop using "eh".

BobblyOrangeGoldGussets shouldn't you be off eating your own anus or something?

So complying with MN talk guidelines means you'd be more suited to nethuns does it?

Baffling.

NopofacehaveI we are in london so she would have to get a weekley buss pass weather she workd here or not as she gets a bus to take her child to school

It's pissing down. pull the other one.

Bobbly. I am genuinely interested in what motivates you to do that

Perhaps bobbly you should think about what motivates you to troll hunt. I mean really think about it. I doubt you get anything productive out of it, and it can really upset someone if they are genuine. Two good reasons not to do it in my opinion.

So the travel won't cost her any more?

Have you pointed out that school time jobs are like gold dust? The perfect one is unlikely to just present itself to her.

Does she have anxiety? You mention she's worried about her child being sick? It must be hard if she has no one to rely on to help out if they are not well.

Why wouldn't I be trying to leave this thread and stop arguing to go and do some gardening?

Do you really think I am a troll with three big computer screens set up, all on multiple sites? This is making me laugh now.

I really didn't mean to upset anyone, I really didn't though.

Not Troll Hunting Bobbly, taking the piss .

Easy to get it wrong isn't it? That's why Troll Hunting is against the guidlines.

But it's just applying, it's not as if she's been offered the job already.

I have cut back all the foliage on my tomatoes so they ripen before I pull the plant up. I have some bulbs to put in and I am getting rid of 20 strawberry plants from the border as they either didn't fruit or the slugs ate the strawberries.

Does that prove I am not a hairy handed trucker?

Op I think yanbu, jobs like those are like golddust, and for anyone saying that the salary wouldn't cover the busfare/childcare. Just to say, if you are a single parent you can claim working tax credits which are quite generous and top up your income, you can also claim child tax credits which are also generous, together with a job like that they would top up an income by at least £100 a week, you can also claim 70% towards any childcare costs. So even if she had to put her child in after school club for 30 minutes it wouldn't be the end of the world.

Some people just don't want to work, that job is bloody perfect.

If you want to troll hunt, you might want to make a better job of it.

Haaaaa