Women who let their hair go grey

[CJ2010]

I don't understand why women, except the very old, say age 70 plus do not cover their grey hair?

I know a couple of women who have just turned 40 who are letting their grey come through and are just leaving it. It makes them
look so much older and washed out. I don't understand it really. I appreciate that some women are into the 'natural' look and are not fussed with make up and hair dye but I think by not having colour on your hair you age yourself dramatically.

Grey hair looks so wrong on younger women. AIBU?

All these Zombie threads are giving me grey hairs 👵

Nearly every thread I have opened today has been a ZOMBIE ffs

She won't see what you're saying now.
Are you sure? Did the OP declare she was leaving mumsnet, never to return?

Also, why does it matter if she doesn't read it, so long as others are enjoying a thought provoking discussion (which they clearly are)?
I've never understood why people get so angry when an old thread gets restarted - its not doing anyone any harm surely?

Let's hope the OP turns up shortly to say hi.

My mums friend is allergic to hair dye. What do you suggest she does? Oh wait nothing because she's happy with her hair.

Omg this thread is 5 years old lol

Grey hair cut well can look really chic! SIL went grey in her 20s, has a short cut and always looks really elegant.
Judy Dench is a good example.
You need to make peace with growing older, it's going to happen whether you like it or not.

You don't get it because you are shallow. Sadly there is no cure for that.

I do respect personal choice but I don't understand why a relatively young woman would allow herself to go grey.

So... you 'respect' personal choice, but then go on to criticise it. Women don't 'allow' themselves to go grey; it is a natural function of the body. Some women naturally go grey in their 20s, others not until much later on in life; so grey hair is not always an indicator of age. 'Grey' hair has a massive range of colour from pepper-and-salt, to stunning silver, to snowy white. I have a neighbour who went grey in her 20s (now in her 50s) who has a waist-length mane of stunningly beautiful silver hair. It is distinctive and much-admired. It actually makes her seem age less, since her appearance has not altered for years.

Hair colour is a simple anti ageing tool. It's easy to do, cheap, non invasive and doesn't require surgery.

I disagree. Once you start colouring your hair you are stuck on a hamster wheel of regular salon appointments, expensive dyes, tints, highlights, lowlights and root touch-ups. Home dye jobs are cheaper than salons, but still not what I would call cheap and still require regular maintenance. Plus. they are a faff to do at home and it is all too easy to accidentally dye clothing, towels, etc.

Why do some women want to be grey? I don't get it.

Well, clearly you don't get it. Maybe that's because other women are not so ageist or judgemental? What if you had an allergy to hair dye and found yourself having to let your hair grow out grey? And then heard your friends commenting on how old you looked? Especially when it would probably be tosh, and more to do with their just not being accustomed to seeing a grey-haired woman. And maybe that is all about a society that prizes youth and tries to squeeze all women into a conforming ideal of beauty; coloured hair, make-up, false eye lashes, shaped and tinted eyebrows...the list goes on. Maybe we all need to start recognizing that women are beautiful in many different ways, at all ages, and we should empower each other to express ourselves however we want?

Some women look great with grey hair but sadly I'm not one of them! I look unkempt when my greys show through because they sprout up in patches. If I was grey all over I would embrace it!

to 70 plus being very old!!
I have a reverse problem as I'm heading for 70 and my hair is still naturally blonde. I know some people think I should give up the blonde hair and turn grey. Should I dye my hair grey to be appropriate to my age??

She won't see what you're saying now.
Are you sure? Did the OP declare she was leaving mumsnet, never to return?

Also, why does it matter if she doesn't read it, so long as others are enjoying a thought provoking discussion (which they clearly are)? I've never understood why people get so angry when an old thread gets restarted - its not doing anyone any harm surely?

I'm not angry, just perpetually astounded that on seeing a thread with hundreds and hundreds of messages people are still replying to the OP only, and lots of them are specifically addressing CJ2010, the OP, who hasn't posted in that name since 2012.

Excellent this is my Monday night sorted

My hair

wicked,

Did you put that pic on Pinterest aswell. Just saw it there.

Looks great anyway whether it's yours or not!

Are you sure wicked?

You're very Pinterest/Google famous if it is .

This op greycist chick is probably all over Pinterest now and eating her words... Grey has moved on since 2012, thanks to Pinterest...

I'm officially claiming rights to the word 'greycist' BTW... 😂

wickedgames that is amazing! I love it!

I'm 24, dyed my hair for the past 10 years. Now I don't bother and I'm letting my grey hair come through. Does that bother you? Does it effect you?

This thread is getting old. Hope it covers up its grey hairs.

Come to think of it, the OP could very well be old enough to have grey hairs herself. Perhaps she even has WRINKLES! AND LIVER SPOTS!!

I'm not 40 yet, and my grey hairs are showing with gay abandon. Firstly, because I have no fecking time to get to a hairdresser. I'm a busy, beaten-up, exhausted mother, working a full-time job. I don't care.
Secondly, I quite like how they look like tiny crinkled pubes growing from my head at my hairline.

Well...at least I know what a zombie thread it now.

to self

I thought only men thought like you!

I dye my previously very dark brown hair. And it looks like shit. I want to be brave and embrace the grey. But comments by the poster make it hard to do. Judge, judge, the older woman. This has stirred up my angry woman mode. Why is it old chrone, spinster, old maid, blah blah? They don't have these awful stigmas for men. Feeling quite cross now.

My reasons:

Hair dye is toxic and possibly carcinogenic
It grows out quickly leaving an awful badger stripe
It makes me feel ill when I dye my hair
It's chic (grey, I mean)
The cost

You asked....

gets comfy in chair, grabs knitting. Puts knitting down because I can't knit
I'm 45 today.
I'm 9 months dye free, I've got roughly 11 months or so to go until all the dye will be out and it will be at the length I need it to be to start growing it longer. I'm keeping it in a long bob for a few months to make the transition easier, ie, getting a bit cut off now and then so it doesn't look so bad as it grows. I'm loving the grey! I have bright green eyes which seem to have become greener as my greys have become more apparent. I stopped dying because it was making my hair fall out, it looked harsh, unnatural and very aging. My hair is now thick, glossy, no longer falling out and is no longer frizzy.
There's a way of going grey , and it's all to do with attitude. I could not care less what anyone thinks of me, or my decision. If you don't want to look washed out, or wear much make up, accessories are the way forward, just add a pop of colour. Each to their own of course. I would no more judge someone for wearing a clown outfit than I would for not dying their hair with harsh and damaging chemicals. I'm really looking forward to seeing how it turns out, and having long, silky, shimmering, sparkling silver-grey hair all the way down my back. I'm Ok with this, you are perfectly happy to be not Ok with it, after all, it's not your hair. I hope you find happiness and acceptance no matter what you choose to do with your own.