Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

Fed my PFB cookie! AIBU?

142 replies

AvoidContactWithEyes · 05/09/2012 08:12

Last night, my husband's grandmother (82) who lives with us (long story) fed crumbs of cookie to DS (you know one of those Millie's cookie things) while I had my head turned. He's 6 months and has so far only had a few spoons of pureed veg.

I snatched DS away and said can you NEVER do that again before flouncing leaving the room to calm down. Feel bad because she is lovely, DS adores her and she is elderly, but she is completely with it and knew well what she was doing (she was being deliberately sneaky about it). I was still seething over breakfast this morning. Husband thinks I should let it go.

PFB thoughts I am having (just to amuse)
Did the cookie contain nuts? What if DS is allergic?
HE COULD HAVE CHOKED!!
What else have you been sneaking him when I haven't been around?
What if it upsets PFB's tummy?
What if PFB rejects my home cooking now for all eternity
Will it have any harmful effects?

Seriously though, am really fucked off. Gah...would you be similarly annoyed if this happened?

OP posts:

TantrumsAndOlympicGoldBalloons · 05/09/2012 09:13

What fanjo said.

valiumredhead · 05/09/2012 09:18

My dad gave me prem ds chocolate cake icing - he was 4 months but in real age only 2 months. I was horrified but got over it pretty quickly.

valiumredhead · 05/09/2012 09:18

my not me

slatternlymother · 05/09/2012 09:19

And cookies are a normal part of a healthy, balanced diet. I never understand people who keep sweeties away from their children, like some kind of forbidden fruit. A few licks of chocolate or a bite of a cookie does no harm. He is a person, after all; albeit a small one so treat him like one. By all means, he needs to be taking in lots of fruit and veg to get his vitamins, but if he occasionally has a nibble of a sweet, it does not matter. Really, it doesn't.

FrankWippery · 05/09/2012 09:19

It's a slippery slope now I'm afraid. There'll be coke in a bottle before you know it.

valiumredhead · 05/09/2012 09:19

Scraps like a dog - ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

TroublesomeEx · 05/09/2012 09:29

It didn't (and still wouldn't) bother me if someone fed the children something I wouldn't/inappropriate inadvertently.

But I do have an issue with it being done deliberately because the person doing the giving knows the parents would like it and it becomes a bit of a 'thing'.

So - Dad's wife babysat DS when much younger whilst dad and I went out for lunch and fed him halved grapes without peeling them (as per recommendations I'd been given before anyone thinks I was just being pfb - something to do with the skin being indigestible and causing colic). I saw her face when I mentioned the peeling after the fact, it was obvious she hadn't done it and obvious she was thinking "shit, I didn't do that". Nothing said. Not a problem.

MIL looking after DS for the day when he wasn't able to attend school - I provided a packed lunch, she told him he didn't need to eat it and could just eat crisps and chocolate instead. Annoyed. And I know this because she told me . All credit to DS though, he refused and insisted on eating his lunch. This is how I know, MIL told me we should be very proud of him as he was so loyal to us because "no matter how many times" she said it, "he refused to eat the chocolate instead of his lunch".

I find it very hard to believe on these threads that everyone who tells the OP to "get a grip" and the like would actually have been that chilled about it at the time.

I wasn't a pfb, but I didn't want to make any mistakes, I wanted to protect my baby from potential harm and it did annoy me when other people deliberately went against my preferences because it's unnecessary and disrespectful.

littlemisssunny · 05/09/2012 09:34

I must admit if it had been my pfb I wouldnt have been pleased, but if it had been my youngest I wouldn't have been bothered, his brother fed him stuff when he was older, I have the cutest video of when he was about 9 months old being fed chocolate mouse by his older brother it's lovely! If I missed a bit when I was sweeping he was on it so fast.

So while I think it wouldn't do him any harm, I understand where you are coming from.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 05/09/2012 09:35

I'm with u folkgirl ! I spent hours juggling work and preparing meals for my dd only to have full lunches returned to me and informed she had enjoyed her toast and cold custard . That is not a balanced meal for a 6m old and I didn't have the time and money to be wasting food all the time.

Y can't grand parents just wait a while til weaning routines are established the baby is known to tolerate all foods so far and them enjoy giving them the odd treat. Saves kids coming home with stomach aches and parents unable to work out y.

naturalbaby · 05/09/2012 09:38

please relax, there are worse 'crimes' such as feeding an ebf baby a bottle of formula without mother's consent/permission. Read a few more posts and you will find dozens of examples to put your incident into perspective.
You will look back in a few years time and laugh at yourself - and if you don't then you should.
My 7month old dc2 grabbed a Magnum ice cream out my hand and ate half of it. He's still alive for us to laugh about it.

squeaver · 05/09/2012 09:42

Of all the LOLs on this thread, the biggest one has to be the "list of first tastes".

Mrsjay · 05/09/2012 09:45

It is a biscuit JEEZ if he was going to have an intense reaction to a biscuit he would have by now IT IS NOT POISON

WorraLiberty · 05/09/2012 09:45

She's ruined him now OP

Get him adopted and have another baby instead

HTH

Mrsjay · 05/09/2012 09:47

She's ruined him now OP

Get him adopted and have another baby instead

sorry i had a vision of a home for ruined PFB all hyped up on sugar and playing video games

WorraLiberty · 05/09/2012 09:49

She'll need to exchange him for one that's untainted by the taste of cookie goodness

Creamtea1 · 05/09/2012 09:50

I agree re the lol @ list of first tastes
Fast forward years to OP's sons first job interview. So tell me, OPs son, is there anything in you could have done differently in your life?
Yes definetly, I should have ensured my first tastes were banana, sweet potato and apple and not allowed them to be infiltrated by filthy dirty Millie's cookie crumbs.
:)

Namechangegalore · 05/09/2012 09:53

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Ormiriathomimus · 05/09/2012 09:53

Oh my lordy lord!

Please chill out, take a deep breath and think about it a bit more carefully. All the thoughts you are having are the ones intended to justify your reaction, and really there is no justification. Say sorry to granny, tell her you overreacted but you only did so because you care about your PFB and worry about getting it wrong. Get her on side. Then maybe she'll be able to follow your rules (although I suspect she will never understand them).

Ormiriathomimus · 05/09/2012 09:55

DS2 at a snail at a few days short of 6m. Not cooked in garlic butter but raw and wrigglin, and still in it's shell. He like the crunch I think.

Ormiriathomimus · 05/09/2012 09:55

ATE not at!

busyboysmum · 05/09/2012 09:55

My MIL was exactly the same, she is lovely and helpful but thinks that we modern women with our love of healthy eating for our kids are rediculous, her kids grew up fine with the crap she gave them etc etc.

She looked after my pfb once I returned to work 2 days and my mum did 2 days. My mum stuck religiously to what I wanted ds to eat but MIL ignored me completely and TBH I couldn't tell her otherwise as she was doing me the favour by having ds. I did however draw the line when I found she was giving him stock cubes to suck on as a snack!

I have since seen her with dn who she is looking after at the moment - SIL is veggie and wanted him brought up a veggie which MIL vehemently disapproved of and would sneak him sausages and the like when SIL was at work.

Herrena · 05/09/2012 09:56

I think the OP over-reacted a bit....

However I do get annoyed when people knowingly dismiss my parental requests and then say 'but it won't do him any harm.' That is not the point! The point is that you are ignoring my wishes for my child!!

OP, I'd go with an apology for flouncing and an explanation of why you got upset. She may well do it again, possibly due to forgetfulness, so if I were you I'd try to relax about it. It is very very unlikely that your DS will reject your cooking :)

BuntyCollocks · 05/09/2012 09:56

YABU. At 6 months, he can have finger foods - even a bit of a Millie's cookie I highly doubt he'd have choked on some crumbs. Unclench.

Ginfox · 05/09/2012 09:56

The sneakiness would bother me most I think. I would let it go, but keep an eye on her, and if she keeps doing this kind of thing as DS gets older, then have a word.

I'm not PFB about "bad" foods, as an occasional treat. However when my Mum suggested that my 5mo DD might like a mince pie, I rather brusquely pointed out that having spent a large percentage of my childhood (and adulthood) in the dentist's chair, I would rather that DD's first food was not sugary. Surprised she didn't remember all the trips to the dentist, but a selective memory seems to be endemic amongst grannies.

TiggyD · 05/09/2012 09:57

Shhhhh!

Don't tell OP.

For PFB

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6